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Old 06-20-2008, 01:25 AM   #1
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Location: Texas
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francesca78 HB User
Post-LEEP fear, side effects? and more fear...

Sorry for the level of detail....I am just scared and getting myself worked up...so I figure maybe someone can help me after reading this!

I had my first abnormal pap in mid-Dec 2007, came in one week later for a colop and biopsy, which showed "high grade." I had a LEEP on Jan 31st, 2008, and all seemed well. The biopsy from the surgery was CIN 2, moderate dysplasia.

On Feb 7th, I started bleeding on schedule (somewhat...I also stopped the nuvaring in Oct 2007, a total of 11 years on the pill/hormonal BC...) and then bled for a long time (period plus post-LEEP bleeding, I thought, total 16 days of bleeding)

In March I started bleeding a bit later than usual (after 31 days), but I think it was a normal period.

In April (after 26 days) I spotted for four days before I started bleeding for 5 days.

Around day 26 of the next cycle (May) I started a weird light brown spotting with the occasional drop of blood for six days. Then spotting on and off for another week. Then a CLOT the size of a nickel on May 16th, followed by some thicker bleeding which lasted until the next evening. Then MORE spotting for about 12 days (until May 29th or so.)

I also bled on June 1-2. I'm not really sure about the other days in June...I thought the weird bleeding/spotting FINALLY had stopped...I had a few blessed pad/liner-free days...and then on the 15th my husband and I had somewhat "rougher" sex. I bled slightly afterward, and have been since then (four days now of very dark, maroon-ish, almost stringy blood....sorry if TMI.)

I am getting scared. We more than waited the number of weeks my doc recommended after the LEEP until we had sex. When we finally did, it was painful, and my husband was gentle. It was painful a few times, and finally in late May/early June, it seemed to be getting better. Then we had that last rougher time, and I am bleeding again.

I pray to God that I am still healing, but part of me is getting terrified all over again that there is something bad inside me...that the bad cells are back, or that something worse is happening. After my colpo but before the LEEP I ended up in the ER with a panic attack. I frequently couldn't breathe because I was getting freaked out thinking I was going to die.

Now I find myself being paralyzed by fear again. If anyone managed to read this far and can offer any advice, I'd really appreciate it. Thank you.

 
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Old 07-12-2008, 11:14 AM   #2
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Join Date: Jul 2008
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viking70 HB User
Re: Post-LEEP fear, side effects? and more fear...

Quote:
Originally Posted by francesca78 View Post
Sorry for the level of detail....I am just scared and getting myself worked up...so I figure maybe someone can help me after reading this!

I had my first abnormal pap in mid-Dec 2007, came in one week later for a colop and biopsy, which showed "high grade." I had a LEEP on Jan 31st, 2008, and all seemed well. The biopsy from the surgery was CIN 2, moderate dysplasia.

On Feb 7th, I started bleeding on schedule (somewhat...I also stopped the nuvaring in Oct 2007, a total of 11 years on the pill/hormonal BC...) and then bled for a long time (period plus post-LEEP bleeding, I thought, total 16 days of bleeding)

In March I started bleeding a bit later than usual (after 31 days), but I think it was a normal period.

In April (after 26 days) I spotted for four days before I started bleeding for 5 days.

Around day 26 of the next cycle (May) I started a weird light brown spotting with the occasional drop of blood for six days. Then spotting on and off for another week. Then a CLOT the size of a nickel on May 16th, followed by some thicker bleeding which lasted until the next evening. Then MORE spotting for about 12 days (until May 29th or so.)

I also bled on June 1-2. I'm not really sure about the other days in June...I thought the weird bleeding/spotting FINALLY had stopped...I had a few blessed pad/liner-free days...and then on the 15th my husband and I had somewhat "rougher" sex. I bled slightly afterward, and have been since then (four days now of very dark, maroon-ish, almost stringy blood....sorry if TMI.)

I am getting scared. We more than waited the number of weeks my doc recommended after the LEEP until we had sex. When we finally did, it was painful, and my husband was gentle. It was painful a few times, and finally in late May/early June, it seemed to be getting better. Then we had that last rougher time, and I am bleeding again.

I pray to God that I am still healing, but part of me is getting terrified all over again that there is something bad inside me...that the bad cells are back, or that something worse is happening. After my colpo but before the LEEP I ended up in the ER with a panic attack. I frequently couldn't breathe because I was getting freaked out thinking I was going to die.

Now I find myself being paralyzed by fear again. If anyone managed to read this far and can offer any advice, I'd really appreciate it. Thank you.
Dear Francesca,

I sympathize with you dear, I know the feeling of working yourself up into a panic about what is happening. May I make the suggestion of grounding yourself by talking to your Dr--get the facts. The internet is not always the best place to try and learn about your own symptoms because every person is a little bit different. You will feel better when you have concrete information.
Panic attacks are very frightening, and if those continue, perhaps you will benefit from talking to a therapist who can also help you work through the fear and or see if medication would help you. You don't have to live in fear! You will come out stronger from all of this, try not to worry, although I know it's hard. And I pray God heal you and give you peace of mind.

Peace.

 
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