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Old 12-09-2003, 01:48 PM   #1
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ChazzyBear HB User
bone mets

we where told today that Moms cancer has spread to her bones, pelvic, femer, shoulders, spice, lower back, neck, skull!! Can anyone tell me what is next??? Maybe a time frame??? There is so many things that need done... many things she wants to do before she is called to the Lords home. I must also tell you ... she has chosen to do no more treatments .... she says she wants to live whats left to the fullest!!! Has any one been this far into this that they can let me know what is to come! Advance warnings are better to deal with. THanks for all you help.
May GOd Bless all of you

 
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Old 12-09-2003, 02:31 PM   #2
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Re: bone mets

Quote:
Originally Posted by ChazzyBear
we where told today that Moms cancer has spread to her bones, pelvic, femer, shoulders, spice, lower back, neck, skull!! Can anyone tell me what is next??? Maybe a time frame??? There is so many things that need done... many things she wants to do before she is called to the Lords home. I must also tell you ... she has chosen to do no more treatments .... she says she wants to live whats left to the fullest!!! Has any one been this far into this that they can let me know what is to come! Advance warnings are better to deal with. THanks for all you help.
May GOd Bless all of you
Hi there...I am very sorry to hear about your mother. I'm sure she must be suffering a great deal. What's next? Well, it all depends on your mother and how much she fights. Usually, patients like these live for about 3 to 6 more months, but that's only an average. It may be less, it may be more. The biggest thing for your mother right now is comfort. Bone mets can be extremely painful, and another thing to worry about is spinal cord compression from mets. Doctors can offer her pharmacological treatment through narcotics and also radiation treatments to reduce the size of the bone mets. These radiation treatments are not looking at cure, rather, to alleviate painful symptoms.

I am glad that you have a positive attitude about the situation, because right now, your mother needs nothing more than the support of her family.

 
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Old 12-10-2003, 06:22 AM   #3
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Re: bone mets

Thanks so much for your insite, however I have a question...... what is spinal cord compression? Maybe in a few weeks she will decide to do some type of treatment, but as right now she says she is done. She is taking pain meds from the doc. to help assist with the pain.
Thanks again for all your help in this matter. Honestly I could not face this tough road if it were not for people like you who are willing to sacrafice time to assist people as my self. May God Bless You.
Have you had someone who has went thru this?

 
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Old 12-10-2003, 07:28 AM   #4
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Re: bone mets

Chazzy-- I am so sorry that you are having to go through this -- it is a hard road to travel. My dad also had bone met (Cancer originated in his lung- but we didn't even know he had cancer until it had spread to the bones). He made it only 2 1/2 months after his diagnosis. My best piece of advice is to consult the hospice facility that her oncologists office recommends. No one could have been more hesitant to do that than I was. Even after all of the great people on this board suggested it-- I still didn't want to do it. But once we did it - it was so much easier. The hospice nurses had seen EVERYTHING before and would prepare me and comfort me. They were quick to our door when we needed them but we were still able to have our "alone" time with the family. They answered all of the questions I had -- if you and your mother haven't already consulted them please do so-- if you have just know that you are in my prayers anyway. It has been 7 months since I lost both my parents from this terrible disease and I am still crying everyday- in the car, in the shower, in my office whenever it is quiet I still see them both suffering and dying it is still so hard, but in a weird way I am thankful that the Lord trusted me enough to let me care for them during the most important journey of their life. So as hard as it is dear, you'll make it and then in the very end she will meet you when it is your turn to join her. Lots of prayers. Hope B. Memphis, Tn.

 
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Old 12-10-2003, 10:41 AM   #5
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trinker HB User
Re: bone mets

Quote:
Originally Posted by ChazzyBear
we where told today that Moms cancer has spread to her bones, pelvic, femer, shoulders, spice, lower back, neck, skull!! Can anyone tell me what is next??? Maybe a time frame??? There is so many things that need done... many things she wants to do before she is called to the Lords home. I must also tell you ... she has chosen to do no more treatments .... she says she wants to live whats left to the fullest!!! Has any one been this far into this that they can let me know what is to come! Advance warnings are better to deal with. THanks for all you help.
May GOd Bless all of you
Chazzybear,

I'm so very sorry to here about your mom and the new things that she is going through right now. My sure that you talk to the hospic as they can really help you through this. They will answer any question that you have. As for your mom not taking any more treatment - I know that radiation will help with the pain (my mom has taken it and it helped her). There really isn't to much we can say to easy the pain that your family is going through right now. Just know that all the people that come to this board are there to support you in any way we can even if it is just listening. Try and be there as much as you can for your mom and try and do whatever it is that she wants. Just treasurer each and every moment with her and keep her close to your heart. I think about you and pray for you each and every day. Take care.

T.

 
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Old 12-10-2003, 10:54 AM   #6
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Re: bone mets

Trinker,
Thanks so much for your kindness.... but you did not mention your Mom.... how are things going for you???? Is your Mom past this part yet?
I ask alot from the good Lord for strenth... I feel sooooo weak some days wondering how I will face another day. Then I feel guilty when I see how strong she is being.
I believe the last time we had talked you and your Mom were going thru what my Mom had already been thru---is that right? Please let me know how she is and how you are doing.
God Bless you and yours

 
Old 12-10-2003, 10:59 AM   #7
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mephoto HB User
Re: bone mets

Hi ChazzyBear,

I am so sorry to hear your news. My dad had something very similar...he had lung cancer that spread to the bone (hip), he lived for 6 months once it spread to the bone. He got along pretty well with the bone met, he underwent radiation, limped a little but did OK up until the last two months. The pain became excrushitating for him, he was on some very high dose morphine. It would work for a few days then the pain would come back. Bone mets are extremely painfull from what I hear. I would suggest calling hospice also, we did with dad and they were there everytime we needed them. If we needed our alone time and space they gave it to us, when we needed them for pain control they were right there. They were absolutely wonderful.

Hope1220, I know the feeling you have. I just lost my dad on Thanksgiving morning, it is soooo hard to go on. I have an hour commute every moring to work, I cry everyday, in the shower, when the kids are sleeping, it is so sad. I thought time would heal this void, but I see you lost your parents 7 months ago, I guess time doesn't ever lessen the pain. I am so thankful that I got to spend as much time with him as I did in the end, and I was there the last 48 hours of his life holding onto his hand. It is just something I will never forget for as long as I live.
K.

 
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