stage 3b please help - Cancer: Lung Message Board

poe0020 · 12-18-2003, 03:53 PM

my mother was just diagnosed with stage 3b non small cell cancer. I feel like i am in a nightmare just last week she was working, perfectly fine. Today we get the news she will not live more than 6 months. How can that be? She is perfectly fine except a bad cough. The cancer has mallesized through her lungs, wind pipes and in the nodes. I cant handle her leaving. The thought of her dying makes me want to just check out. Does anyone have any experience of the docs saying 6 months but the cancer went into remission? Is 6 months accurate? I need answers

MichaelNYC · 12-18-2003, 07:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by poe0020

my mother was just diagnosed with stage 3b non small cell cancer. I feel like i am in a nightmare just last week she was working, perfectly fine. Today we get the news she will not live more than 6 months. How can that be? She is perfectly fine except a bad cough. The cancer has mallesized through her lungs, wind pipes and in the nodes. I cant handle her leaving. The thought of her dying makes me want to just check out. Does anyone have any experience of the docs saying 6 months but the cancer went into remission? Is 6 months accurate? I need answers

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mephoto · 12-19-2003, 07:59 AM

Hi poe0200,

I am so sorry to hear of your news. My dad just went through what your mom is going through. It's a very good sign that your mom looks and feels OK. Keep her spirits up, it does wonders! When your mentally strong and physically strong you can fight this disease longer. That's the way my dad was. My dad had stage IIIA and he lived for 2 years. He just passed away on Thanksgiving morning. His doctor said he beat all the odds by living that long, I think his positive attitude and will to live made him fight this harder. Yes he did get sick, he did have mets to the bone and the other lung, and he had pain but he had all of his witt, since of humor and was very mobile up until the day before he passed. I wish you and your mom the best, you have a long road ahead, but be positive, you will enjoy the time together more. I read this on a post here and it is so true: I used it on my dad's picture board at the wake:

In the beginning we wished for a mistake or a misdiagnosis...
Later we wished for a remission or a miracle....
Then we wished for peace...and that is what he got...peace...

You are in the second part of this phrase, keep the spirits up, you will make it through this.
K.

poe0020 · 12-19-2003, 11:24 AM

med thanks for the reply but was your dad sick when he was diagnosed. My mom had no absolutely no symptoms prior to the diagnosis. She finally had a CT scan and Xrays and a mass showed up. She had surgery last Monday and they said the primary tumor was removed but it has spread throughout her right lung, mediasterum (sp?), lumph nodes etc. They tested her bones and brain and it is not there. How can you be perfectly fine and have someone tell you you have about 6 months to live? It is insane. I will not be fine. I cannot stop crying. I am so close to her and live with her. My daughter is also very close. I am so confused and angry. One minute I am praying to god and the next cursing him. I have so much rage inside of me, not at her but she is such a wonderful person and does not deserve this. How accurate are these oncologist? We want her to go to Houston they apparently have the best cancer hospital in the nation there.

ChazzyBear · 12-19-2003, 02:03 PM

Poo20,
CHerrish every last moment, take pictures, hug touch laugh, hug, touch , laugh and then again.... This is a time God is giving you and your family, please do not be mad at God as he also needs GREAT MOMS AND GRANDMAS in heaven---she will always be with you in mind and spirit..KNOW IS YOUR TURN TO BE THERE FOR YOUR MOM AS SHE WAS FOR YOU WHEN YOU WERE GROWING UP. Dont be sad but pick her spirits up and make her laugh. Help her to get right with God if she needs to and pray alot!!!
My Mom has stage 4 and her days are numbered, BUT we have created sooo many great memories and we have hugged and talked about sooooo many things that I will cherrish forever----these are momments I THANK GOD FOR , moments i would not have gotten with her if she would have gotten killed in a car accident. Yes the accident would be easier on me BUT I really would have lost out on so much more!!
May God Bless You , Keep The Faith
CHazzy