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Cancer: Lung Message Board
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Old 04-06-2004, 06:54 PM   #1
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mom2o HB User
Thanks for listening about my dying mother.....

My mom is receiving hospice care at this time. I honestly don't know how she is surviving. She doesn't eat, barely drinks and is skeletal. She is bed ridden and is starting to talk wierd. She thought my brother was locked in a closet outside her window. I am 31 and her primary caregiver. This is so devasting. I am just waiting for her to die and be out of this misery. 2 months ago she was "fine" or so we thought. My thoughts and prayers are with everyone going through this terrible disease. By the way, my aunt is Moily on this board...............
Thank you.

 
Old 04-07-2004, 05:17 AM   #2
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mephoto HB User
Re: Thanks for listening about my dying mother.....

mom2o,

Glad to see hospice is involved now. It seems you are nearing the end of this journey with your mom. I remember with dad when it got to this point me and my family had to tell him it was OK to let go. We would sit bedside and just tell him to sleep we will all be OK. We reassured him that Mom would be OK, we will take care of her. It was very important for us to tell him to let go. It makes their passage easier I believe. Soon after we did this he passed away. God Bless you and your family,
K.

 
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Old 04-07-2004, 05:31 AM   #3
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Re: Thanks for listening about my dying mother.....

Thank you. We have done this also. I appreciate your words of comfort.

 
Old 04-07-2004, 09:43 AM   #4
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Re: Thanks for listening about my dying mother.....

Hi niece, Glad to see you found this board. There are alot of kind, knowledgeable people here, who have been or are going through this horrible disease. Your mom, my sister, is so lucky to have raised an exceptional daughter in you. I know she is very proud of you, and if she was well, would tell you so. I'm praying for her and you. Tell her I love her.

 
Old 04-08-2004, 06:35 AM   #5
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Re: Thanks for listening about my dying mother.....

Hi Mom2o

Just to let you know you and your mum are in my prayers. I lost my mum to lung cancer 12 weeks ago…….it all happened so fast that there was no time to move her to a hospice and she died in hospital. I was with her constantly at the end and we made sure we each said just how much we loved each other. It was hard to let her go but she was ready and wanting to die - the end was very gentle and peaceful with me sitting stroking her head and holding her hand……..I hope it will be the same for you.

 
Old 04-08-2004, 07:11 AM   #6
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Re: Thanks for listening about my dying mother.....

My thoughts are with you I was the care giver for my

mom as well. It is very hard and painful to watch them

suffer as they do at the end. My mom to started saying

off the wall stuff. The case with my mom is hospice was

giving her to many meds. When my brother who is a nurse

realized this and had the meds. cut down my mom was

better for another 2 months before she passed away in

March 2003. She was alert and able to communicate with

us up until the day she passed. I know when she was

talking out of her head it was kinda scarey and I have

four children that was very scared going through this and

watching her die. I am thankful that my brother seen

what was happening and we were able to enjoy her last

two months. You will be in my thoughts, Haylee

Last edited by haylee31; 04-08-2004 at 07:19 AM.

 
Old 04-08-2004, 12:01 PM   #7
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mom2o HB User
Re: Thanks for listening about my dying mother.....

Thank you all very much. My mom is still holding on and yes hospice does push to medicate. She doesn't really feel much of anything anymore. It's very distressing and awful to confront. What's even more awful is her heart is strong and just keeps pumping even though she has no body fat or muscle at all left. She has a bad rash on her backside due to falling asleep on the bedpan and I think she forgets and goes in the middle of the night. We have to change her sheets and bedding pads daily and it hurts her when we do it. They couldn't put a catheter in her so she has to suffer even further. I pray that she goes soon and peacefully. It's like watching death everyday - my mother is already gone.

 
Old 04-08-2004, 01:30 PM   #8
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Re: Thanks for listening about my dying mother.....

Trust me - the memories of the way things are now will pass. I can understand only too well how you are feeling - my mum too had sores and also messed herself - there are time that the way she lost her dignity etc is all I can see but I can only tell you that when the time came, her going was peaceful - she was ready and wanting to go - and I was ready to let go. I believe that there is a reason for everything - maybe thats why I found this message board at this time.......my mum won't have died in vain if for just one second our experience can give you some comfort.

One other thought - take care of you.........there will be many calls on you when the inevitable happens - take some time to gather your strength.
xxxx

 
Old 04-09-2004, 04:46 AM   #9
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mom2o HB User
Re: Thanks for listening about my dying mother.....

Thank you for all the comforting words. It means alot.

 
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