Hi Jeanne- I have to be the bad guy here (girl actually)
Sorry! At age 77, I feel like your Mom has the right to do whatever she chooses. Belive me, I know it hurts!!! And I am sorry to say it so bluntly. My husband has small cell lung cancer, and was diagnosed terminall ill in December , with 6-9 months to live. But, he decided to stop his cancer treatment less than 1/2 way through it. At 1st I begged and pleaded with him to continue treatment. But, I then realized how selfish I was being. I was thinking only of myself, and my fear of losing him. It is like he said, we are ALL gonna die, and there is nothing we can do to stop that. If it is my time (he said) then it is just my time. And he said, if it is not my time, then I trust that the Lord will heal me. He said he only took the 1st 1/2 of the treatments because I made him feel so guily. He only took treatments for this cancer that they can not cure, just to make me feel better. So, my emotions are STILL very mixed. Sometimes I still want to drag him to the Oncologist and make him take treatment, even if it is only for me. But I can not do that. He is 44 years old and has made that decision. As his friend and his wife, I will respect and support that decision.
I think instead of trying to make your Mom go. You should find a way to have a more intimate conversation with her and find out WHY she does not want to go. There may be something that she can etll you that will help you come to terms with her decision.
Good Luck, I wish you the best.