Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Louisville, KY
Re: CT Scan..
Hi Bekka- The very first thing you have to do is take a deep breath, and relax! I know that is easier said than done. My husband has cancer and he feels the anxiety of not knowing, the upset stomach, the headaches. We are also playing teh waiting game, 8 days before we kno all of the details of where it has spread this time, and what they can do for him. You know, he should be down here replying to you. One of these days, I will gehim on here. He s a good advisor, he just has to come to terms with his problem first, and then matbe...! I will telll you this. Yesterday was a turning point for Scott. He made a firm decision "I will fight this, I have many reasons to live".. and you know what, because he decided that, we had a wonderful evening. If you are stubborn, this type of attitude adjustment might just work for you to Bekka. We went to dinner (he could not eat for several days) and then we visited friends, worked a crossword puzzle, played with the puppies, and laughed.. and laughed.. and laughed some more. Laughter is good medicine. Your joy comes from within you, but hard to find you are are caught in the flurry of a storm (that is what it feels like). What works me is, I sit down and think of all of the wonderful gifts God has given me in my life, and then I thank him! Scott and I have a new motto, every morning we say "Thank you God, bless me again". I do realize, I am not the one that has cancer, and I have never had cancer. Scott has cancer, and I dedicate my life to making him happy, to helping him find his joy, and to make sure that he NEVER forgets that God loves him, and God wants good things for him... Even if that means going home (I hope it is not time for that). I wish I could tell you how to deal with it. Are you sleeping? We think we have discovered that a big party of Scott's recent depression was NO SLEEP. Scott took a natural supplement called Melatonen (spelling?), he took 3 mg's.. and he also took 1 TylenoPM, he slept like a baby Monday night and woke up Tuesday with a anew attitude. Yesterday, the oncologist gave him a script for a sleep aid called purepac, he did not like that, he said his mixture was better, so he is going back to his sleep aid. The oncologist said that lack of sleep brings forth a lot of emotions, and said sleep is one of the most important things Scott needs right now.
I do not know where you stand with Religion, or if you are a Christian. But if you would, try to read Ephesians 6:10,11,13 (This entire book is good, but it is these verses that Scott keeps repeating) . This is what Scott is reading now, and he says he feels stronger, and feels protected and safe.
Sorry I rambled.. I do that! I can never just say anything simply.
Bekka- I will say a special prayer, just for you. I do hope all of the tests come back with nothing but good news.
I am not on here as muc as I woudl like to be, but I do check in. Anytime you want to talk, I will try to be here and I will always try to help, if I can.