My prayers are with you and your family, babbles. I m going through this with my mom and dad right now and sometimes try to figure out if it were me what would I prefer. I have 3 boys (14 yo / 12 yo and 5 years old) and I feel I too would want my last days to be at home where if they wanted to "sneak in" to see me in the middle of the night just to hug me they could. I was sheilding my boys from their gparents because the pain it caused me was so great I didn't want them to feel this pain. But one of them asked why they couldn't go with me sometimes to see them. Well I took them the next time and while the older boys realized that both gparents are ill, they told me it was nothing compared to what they were imagining. Lesson learned for me. As a side note I bought the book "final gifts" the other day-- it is a bit painful to read I find myself crying while I'm reading it (but have cried reading the tv guide lately too) but I am finding this book extremely helpful and insightful. Hope B.