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Old 11-05-2005, 11:33 PM   #1
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How to Best Support My Boyfriend...and Encourage My Mom

I recently learned that my boyfriend's mother has lung cancer. She also has a tumor behind her heart (which is probably related to the lung cancer). I'm VERY worried, though I try not to seem as worried when I'm around him. He and I are very close, so I have let him know that I am absolutely behind him, love him, and will be there for him. I have also let his parents know that I am there for them. I have encouraged him to be as positive around his mom as he can, as a positive attitude goes a long way in the healing process.

His mom will be going to chemo/surgery in about three weeks (which, I'm concerned, is too long to wait), and she is currently taking medication to slow down the spread of the cancer. I hope that this visit will prove to be just what she needs...but if it's not, I'm going to really need some advice about how to support someone who knows he will be losing a loved one. He and his mom are really close, too, so this has been really hard on him. I'm actually starting to worry about my own mom, as she has been coughing a lot for the past year, and she still will not see a doctor about it. This is one of the symptoms that my boyfriend's mother has. My BF's mother is an ex-smoker (for about 5 years now), so that's what I think caused the cancer. My mom, the daughter of a chain smoker, is also at risk for second-hand diseases, and I know that second hand smoke can actually be more damaging than for the smoker, herself.

Does anybody have any advice for me about how to give my BF the best support possible? Also, how can I convince my mom to see the doctor about her own coughing??

Thank You in Advance,
Colleen

 
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