My mother died - Cancer: Lung Message Board

courtenaynt · 03-04-2007, 11:09 AM

My mother died.

It is strange to even write that. We had less than four months with her. We are all still in shock--really believed we could win, that we had a chance.

I have been thinking about you all, and feeling pain and sadness for all of our individual struggles. I had no idea it could or would be like this. I don't even know how I will go on without her.

Everyone who's offered support, courage, advice, or even an ear: thank you. My thoughts and prayers remain with you and your families during your fights with this difficult and relentless disease.

tadalaja · 03-04-2007, 12:27 PM

So sorry you lost your Mum. It is important for us all to make the most of the time we have with our loved one's we take them for granted its only when they get sick that we really think about how important they are. My thoughts and prayers are with you at this sad time I hope you have support and love around you to help you through.

lisalandless · 03-04-2007, 01:35 PM

I am living in fear of one day being in your position with my Dad as my Mum has already passed away 6 years ago. Seems like a lifetime ago. how sad and lost you must feel without her. I feel your pain and hope to give you strength in the fact that even though how could I go on, six years later I am still here. My life has changed and that hole in your stomache never goes but I am happy and look forward to one day being with her again. God bless.

Janmarie2 · 03-04-2007, 05:50 PM

My sympathies for the loss of your mother. It is never easy to loose a loved one and I think parents are difficult as we only have one mom and dad. You will miss her most every day but that does not mean your life stops. My mom died from NSCLC on Nov. 25. 2006 and I miss her alot but my life continues, I laugh, I smile, I have good times and yes sometimes I feel sad and cry.Some people look at me and ask "how can you be so happy you just lost your mom and I know how close you and she were ? "

The secret is I focus not on what I have lost but on what I had. I had a GREAT mom, she was loving , kind, funny and had a way of making even a stranger feel special.Alot of people never have that and to me that is so much sadder then having that and loosing it. My mom made me who I am today a and because I respect her I am not going to waste my life feeling depressed that she has moved on in her spititual journey. My mom is gone in a physical sense but she lives on in the hearts of so many people. I see her in her grandsons who were the apples of her eyes and who she spent alot of time with and I see her in most of the people that loved her so no she is not lost to me.

Yes I miss her but to have had her and lost her verses never having had her in my life the choice is too easy. I know without a doubt that when I am taking in my last physical breath as my life ends my mom will be there waiting to welcome me to lifes next great adventure.

I will send prayers to help you get through the difficult days and to find
the inner strength to focus on what you had verses what you lost. I think what most of us want when our mom's die is a big hug and someone to tell us things will be ok so here is just that a big ((((((((HUG))))))))

and yes things will be ok. JanMarie

Hammer6401 · 03-04-2007, 06:30 PM

I am so sorry to hear that your Mother passed....I wish there wassomething I could say that woulld make you feel better or take away the pain...or more importantly answer some of those why questions that are flooding your head...the truth is I can't...I do know what you are going through though...i lost my father to cancer in 2005...there is not a day that goes by that I don't think of him and wish he was still here....not much but hugs and a a good listener helped me....it will get better as time passes, but it will take time...I would suggest you continue to talk to those wh have gone through the same and try to remember the great things about your Mom...she would want you to continue on and to be happy...that always helps me...I know my Dad would kick my *** if he knew I was sad all the time because of his death...i try to look at how lucky I was to have such a great Dad...many wonderful memories...they will never die..good luck and God Bless you and your family.