How do you deal with the uncertainty/waiting? (just venting) - Cancer: Skin Message Board

TampaSal51 · 04-27-2006, 04:14 PM

So right now I feel like screaming. I feel like crying. I want to smash something or punch someone. I will do none of that. I will drain, scrub and refill the hot tub and drink a beer or two.

I got a certified letter in the mail today stating that my last biopsy needed "further treatment". A little over a year ago I had my first skin cancer surgery.....basal cell carcinoma on my face. Since then I have had a number of biopsies done. Most came back as normal/benign. One came back with unclear borders and will be watched. The last biopsy result initially came back as just a normal mole....benign. Now this letter, three weeks later stating something was not right with the initial biopsy results.

I know most of you are going through so much worse than I am right now and I am so sorry to dump on you all, but I can't dump on anyone else just now. One time you were in my shoes. How did you deal with it? Did you feel like I do now? I know this will turn out to be nothing. Just another mole with unclear borders, but the uncertainty is what drives me nuts!!! Why couldn't they just call me and tell me this? Why send a certified letter that would arrive days after a phone call could have cleared this up?

ARRGGGGGGGHHH!!! Guess it's time to go scrub some more and then sit down with a beer and see if my hummingbird comes by to soothe my soul.

Thank you all for listening to my drivel.

Ladypepper · 04-27-2006, 08:00 PM

I am sorry that you are frustrated and worried. I know how you feel. I was biopsied in Jan, results in Feb... came back as malignant melanoma. Took me until April to have the surgery and SNB... another 2 weeks for any info on that... just to find out it is worse than they thought and I have to go back in for more surgery. But I just kind of figure, getting upset isn't going to change one thing... so I just wait. LOL I hope that you get good news and everything is fine. In the meantime, a beer sounds good.

Ga Lady · 04-27-2006, 08:57 PM

Not saying that yours is trivial in the least SO PLEASE don't take this the wrong way OK? If I had got the call mine was Basal Cell I would of jumped for joy! Mine was Malignant Melanoma also. Basal is not a killer. Melanoma is. Sounds harsh I know. But please (while your drinkin' your beer and cleaning every corner) be thankful! Thank God that you were diagnosed with one of the least invasive skin cancers there is.

Now, it's ok to vent and cry and smash stuff. I believe I done a number of things. But now, I look at life in a whole different perspective. We live one day at a time. Never promised tomorrow. Never quaranteed the next breath. Enjoy life. Dance as if no one were watching you. And smile so the whole world will wonder what you're up to!

You're in my prayers. Regardless of the situation Cancer is a scarey word. I know. Love and Hugs and (wanna come clean my house while your in the mood?) from the North Georgia Mountains!

TampaSal51 · 04-28-2006, 02:58 AM

Thanks for the kind words.

GALady, the basal cell diagnosis was a year ago last November. This one is undiagnosed as yet. I am praying that this biopsy too will be basal cell. I'll keep you all posted and thanks once again for letting me vent here.

effieklinker · 04-28-2006, 10:49 AM

We live one day at a time. Never promised tomorrow. Never quaranteed the next breath. Enjoy life. Dance as if no one were watching you. And smile so the whole world will wonder what you're up to!

Hey GaLady

You are absolutely right there. I had a malignant melanoma too & it sure does alter your perspective on life, doesn't it? I hope like me that you have been free of it for some years.

Hang in there Tampa Sal. The waiting game is a tough one. I've been there a few times. I hope you get good news.