It finally got through to me that the odd sore that keeps rehealing and breaking open on my ear may be cancerous. I have an appointment Mon am with my pcp to get his take on it and the options after that.
After I made the appt, I went online and did a lit search on skin cancer. (I am a scientist, so it is natural for me to do this kind of thing). Saw some pics I kinda wish I hadn't.
This kinda scares me, , for a couple of reasons: one is that it is on the edge of my ear, and has actually been there for a long time w/o me recognizing it (more on that in a bit), so if it is cancer I am likely to incur some difiguration as a result of treatment. The other is that I know that moves me into a higher risk group for melanoma, and I already am in a high risk group, as one of my brothers died of metastatic melanoma.
I have chronic Lyme disease, in remission right now, and over the years I've experienced a variety of odd rashes and lesions as a result of the disease. I thought this one was just another one. Then I realized that it has been at least two years since I'd had skin problems from Lyme. This lesion is at the approximate site of an old Lyme-related lesion, but I was reading that often both bcc and scc will arise at sites of irritation, scars, etc.
When I really took a look at this, I realized that I'd been ignoring the thin pale tissue around it, extending into the shell of my ear. After reading, I now understand that this may be an extension of the lesion.
I am not doing well emotionally right now. Haven't talked to my family or friends yet, no point upsetting them until I have a better idea of what I'm dealing with (I live alone, so there's no one here to sort of rattle off to-- makes it lonesome at times like this). So went cruising for an on-line support group for skin cancer so I could at least talk about my concerns.
Here I am. I guess it would be more appropriate to say that right now I am scared and near tears.
BTW, I just clicked on Lyme disease, and the info provided by HealthNet through WebDr (I think that is what it is) is outdated and uninformed. Somehow it doesn't give me a lot of confidence in the rest of the site. But I really needed to talk to someone about this.
Hello,
I can't help you at all with this but I just wanted to say I can understand how frightened you must be and that I will be praying for you. Is it possible for you to go the emergency room instead of waiting until Monday? This is easy to say but if you must wait until Monday, try to focus on something to keep you busy. During my worst times I keep busy and focus on "I can do all things through God who gives me strength." I really will keep you in my prayers. Let us know how you are. Bern
Thanks, Bern. serendipitous-- one of my favorite Lyme folks is also named Bern!
No point in going to the emergency room-- they would just look at it and suggest that I see my pcp for a biopsy or referral. I've had this for a long time, the only thing that's changed is that I really SAW it, if that makes sense. And made me realize I've been avoiding seeing it.
For 20 years I have lived with a disease that dismantled my life, messed up my brain, and nearly killed me. I can wait another day or two to find out what for sure this is on my ear. One thing that Lyme teaches you is patience and the ability to take things as they come (because you have to!).
Assuming it is cancer,this is not likely to kill me, and is not likely to dismantle my life the way Lyme did, but what I feel right now is a bit of shock-- something ELSE to have to adapt to and accommodate. And the prospect of possibly losing part of my ear.
Of course, the second thought that entered my mind is, well, I guess I'd better start letting my hair grow long!
As for keeping busy-- LOL, since being treated for Lyme, it is such pure ecstacy to be able to do things that I probably am busier than I need to be. At times, I've had to give myself a gift of times of quiet and idleness, to make sure I don't overdo.
But it sure helps to write about my feelings to other people who have been through this kind of uncertainty. It's good to be heard. Thank you so very much for responding.
Years ago, I had a mole on the top of my left ear. Over the years, I've had a couple of surgeries on it because the place reoccurred several years after the first surgery. So I have a small nick in the top of my ear - big deal. It's been about 10 years now since I had a problem there.
But there's a better solution if this might be a disfiguring surgery. For bcc or squamous skin cancers, I would demand a reference to a competent surgeon who specializes in Moh's surgery. Moh's surgery, of course, involves removing thin slices of the cancerous lesion, fixing and examining them until clear margins are obtained. Then, if skin grafts are needed, the surgeon can perform them at that time or later.
I recently had a fairly large bcc on the side of my nose, extending into the cheek. Moh's surgery was performed, and a goodly sized chunk of the side of my nose proved cancerous and fell victim to this process.
The surgeon simply extracted a piece of the inside of my shell-pink ear and transplanted it. He explained that the inside of the ear would come closest to matching the side of my nose down toward the nostril. And he was right! A perfect match was the result. You would have to examine my nose and cheek carefully to see that anything was done.
I've had a huge number of bcc's removed over about 40 years. Most were easily removed and left no scar. Now I have semi-annual inspections of my entire body by good dermatologists. Just had that done again last week, so I have bunch of red blotches where keratoses were frozen off my face and arms.
Keep up with the danged things (skin cancers) and they won't give you too much trouble, even though the first positive biopsy is scary. I of course refer to basal cell and squamous cancers. Melanoma needs immediate attention.
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