Noodles001

I am terrified, but not for me.
My best friend said to me the other day that he had 'male problems' and needed to go to the doctors. We were talking over the internet and joking about it. I asked him to tell me what he meant, he said that it may scare me though and he would prefer not to say. I joked; 'Oh come on, how bad could it be? Testicular cancer?'

It took him a very long time to answer. I could tell by his face over ****** that my statement had really hit home. He simple replied 'I don't know, thats a possiblity.'

I have known this boy all my life, hes my best friend, I love him and I hate that there is nothing I can do. Its not even like I can be there for him. He said I wouldn't understand because I am a girl. That is fine, and I respect if that is his opinion, but I want to understand. I want to be there for him, but in his opinion, I am missing the parts to be able to do that.

We have been though thick and thin together since we have met. I have gone through a lot of rubbish and hes always been there, holding my hand, and now it really matters I can't do that for him, and he wont even let me do my best.

I don't even know how to approach the subject. I know if he goes to the doctors and it turns out to be bad, he wont tell me. He'll bottle it up. I know he will. I need him to know that even if its about something I could never relate to, I'll still be here for him.

Cancer scares me incredibly. My other best friend died of Leucemia a few months ago, and I can't let it steal another loved one from me.

We are only 17. He is only 17. Surely thats too young? Of course not, I know, I just wish it was.
I know however scared I am, he will be feeling a thousand times worse.

I don't even know why I am writing this.
Its such a ramble, and I apologise.

Do any of you have any suggestions as to what I can say or do, just to make him realise I am always here.
This has really shaken him up, like nothing I've ever seen before. Normally when I tell him I'll never leave his side, I can tell by his eyes he knows I mean it. I say it in reference to this and there is so much doubt.

I know that it is nothing personal - its just because he is full of so much fear. I am not concerned about this being personal, I am just wanting advice on how to comfort him that has any sort of affect.

I wish all of you on this board the best of luck with your problems and thank you in advance for any advice given. I really am terrified.

Noodles. xxxx