Asking for Advice - Caregivers Message Board

briggsy61 · 05-19-2004, 06:40 AM

My brother suffered a stroke in Jan. Was in hospital until end of March. He suffers left side paralysis in the arm he is able to walk with the aid of a quad cane. The hospital was going to send him to a nursing home but my husband and I decided to bring him to our house. Things were good at first but now i think we may have bit off more than we could chew. I work full time, my husband is disabled from 5 back surgeries and he is the one home with my brother all day and it is starting to take a toll on him physically and mentally.
When he first came home we had home care but that stopped after a month. Now everything is put on basically me. I have to sponge bath him because of the type of bathtub we have (claw foot) he cannot get into it. My question is does anyone know of anyplace i can go to get help???

Marie55 · 05-19-2004, 10:00 PM

Check with the hospital social services, they will be able to guide you or make arrangements for help, such as home health care. Usually someone will come in 1-3 times a week and give bath, etc.

caregiver · 06-07-2004, 12:28 PM

Is your brother in any type of physical therapy? The reason I ask is this could give him more mobility and independance, at least to the point that he might be able to participate more in his own care. I also think the hospitals social services person should at least be able to give you a starting point.

Try to get a close friend or family member to come sit with him a couple of hours a week to give and your hubby some down time. They don't even really have to do anything except keep an eye on him. Take this time to go to a movie, the beach, out to dinner, whatever you and your husband do to relax.

Good luck

mel1977 · 07-28-2004, 11:12 PM

I work for a rehab hospital as a CNA and have worked extensively with stroke patients. First, I want to commend you for taking your brother to live with you. It is so important in one's recovery to have family that is loving and supportive. But, stroke can be the hardest debilitation to have, live with, and deal with. You said it was his left side affected? Does he have apraxia at all or is he pretty with it? I ask b/c certain sides of stroke have effects on speech and body function. I think that those who suffer a Left CVA are the ones with the speech and mental dysfunctions, but I may be confusing that, so pardon me if I am. One thing you should do is sit with your brother and talk to him about this. You want to do this in a caring manner so that he doesn't feel anger or resentment or guilt. He shouldn't feel like he is a burden. However, he does need to understand that is not his fault and that physically your family is not able to give him the good care he deserves. A rehab hospital would be very beneficial. How much function does he have?? This part is very important. He may qualify for in-patient rehab. This would not only help in him becoming more independent, but give you and your husband a good break. Then, after his stay, it can be decided how things will be done from there.
For bathing, see if insurance will pay for a hoyer lift. This would make getting in and out of the tub much easier, and require no lifting. The sling can even go in the tub with him, and you can use a hoyer to get in and out of bed and his chair. You can even use them on toilets. Anyway, there are also day programs and I strongly suggest seeking out a stroke support group. This would be beneficial not only for you and your husband but be good for your brother as well. Feel free to ask any other questions you may have. I have worked in Rehab for five years, My mother is an RN in the same company and our specialty areas are stroke, brain injury and other general disabilities including spinal cord injuries.
Good luck and best wishes!