Originally Posted by kenbob71
First thing. Don't let anyone (even your mom) guilt you into anything. I suspect you were "guilted" into the agreement in your 20's, anyway.
Having been a caregiver for my wife for a year and a half before she died, I can tell you that it is the most stressful thing I"ve ever been thru. And I knew the end was not far away. I cannot imagine looking forward that the next ???? years if my life would be like that.
It will destroy your marriage, your work life, forget about a social life. Caregiving WILL BECOME your life. And you are way too young for that to happen. You will feel like you are in a prison and resent every minute of it.
There are other care possibilities out there. Explore them and find one that will help you fulfill your responsibilities to your brother, but that will be fair to you and your family.
I couldn't add anymore than what's already been said here, especially the part of letting go of the guilt your mother is putting on you.
Not only will caregiving become your life while you're DOING it, it's with you and burdens your emotionally AFTER the fact as well.