CP and having children - Cerebral Palsy Message Board

Steffers2318 · 06-03-2006, 06:22 PM

Hi,

Some comments in the other thread got me thinking. Whenever my mom asks, I always say that I don't want kids...but I don't know if I don't want them, or if it's that I'm afraid I couldn't take care of them. I think it would break my heart if other kids made fun of my kids at a young age because I'm not "normal", or if my kids would become embarassed of me being different. However, I know those things can be overcome by talking to them...I'm more concerned about physical things. For example, I have to use crutches or a walker to walk. How would I carry them up stairs, chase them when they're misbehaving, just PICK THEM UP...stuff like that.

Albertarose, Adinahwithkaden, you guys said you have kids...how do/did you handle the physical stuff? (Mostly I'm talking about when they're really little.) Can you walk independently? Are your husbands AB or disabled (if you don't mind me asking)? CPChick, how do your friend with CP and her disabled husband manage? Basically, if you or anyone else with CP could share your experiences with children I'd really appreciate it!

Teryn · 06-03-2006, 10:44 PM

There's a book written by Denise Sherer Jacobson called "The
Question of David." that is the story of her and her husband, both with CP and in wheelchairs and the process they went through to adopt their son David. Denise was very honest about their struggles but they found a way to make it work!

NitroChic · 06-03-2006, 11:09 PM

I work with a gentleman that is blind. He has been divorced for about 3 years, and his son is now 7. This child was raised with a blind father, and he know how he is to behave because he was raised that way. Your children would be raised with you as their parent, so your children will behave and adjust accordingly. I think alot of people believe they they need to adjust their life to the children...It's not the case. Children should fit into the family and life already established when they are born. It sounds as though you will probably have plenty of support, so don't count yourself out as a fantastic parent.

Steffers2318 · 06-04-2006, 08:35 AM

Thanks, I'll have to check out that book. And I guess I never thought of it that way, that the children learn to behave certain ways based on the situation. That makes sense, though! Hmmm.

Thrill Lover · 06-04-2006, 09:58 AM

I don't have children, but I am going to babysit my one-year-old nephew by myself during the day for the next 3 days. We have a one-story house, but if for some reason, I need to go down the basement with him, I think the easiest way is to get down on my butt with him in my arms. This isn't the "normal" way, but it's what I have to deal with. I don't want to risk us both falling down the stairs. And for when babies small enough, I plan on using Baby B'jorns (a pouch that you wear in front of you), and slings. I'm not sure if that would hurt my back, but I'll try it.

I agree that children learn to adapt to your needs. I read somewhere that children learn things, such as how they should hang on to their disabled parents, and things like that. There is definitely a way.