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Old 11-06-2003, 10:13 AM   #1
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Exclamation 2 1/2 year old with imaginary friend...This is kinda long

Hello. my 2 1/2 year old daughter just started picking up an imaginary friend. I am new to this. It kinda freaks me out! She carrys full conversations with this person named "Lolly." My DH asked her one day if Lolly was a boy or girl. She responed with "girl." My brother who lives with us, tells me he can hear her at night talking, and sometimes yelling at Lolly. Isn't she a little young to start this? Should I worry?

From the time she was really little she has always been above average in everything. Talking, knowing her ABC's and shapes etc. I have heard that children who are really smart tend to have imaginary friends. Is this true?
My father just passed away a few months ago. He and Jade, my daughter, were inseperable. He was with her from birth until the day he died. She kept him going most days. Some people in my family believe that she is the reason why he lived so long with his illness. Could this be her way of dealing with the loss?
Also, Jade tells me things that have come true. For instance, I am pregnant and we all thought it was a boy. Jade kept telling us it was a girl. She would get mad at us if we called the baby a boy. Well, we found out yesterday that it is a girl. She was right! She tells us that the baby is sitting on grandpa's lap in heaven. Sometimes it can go as far as her telling me who is on the phone as it is ringing. She has never been wrong. This is so strange to me. Am I overreacting? Help.
Sorry for so many questions, I just don't know where to go with this? Anyone had this happen to them in any way?
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Old 11-06-2003, 12:27 PM   #2
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We have an imaginary friend here also. Lauren has been friends with "Aleisha" for about 2 years. She just turned 4. So it is not too young for her to start.

I am a person who is really big on faith. I have faith that there are things go on that we dont see or hear but are there none the less. You can drive yourself crazy trying to come up with explanations to everything.

I would take the focus off of any gift that she might have, let her have the friend, and let her just work through her emotions about her grandfather in her own way. Imaginary friends can be the best help a child has. Laruen's came up right after we lost my father in law to a brain tumor. I have seen nothing harmful about it and will continue to let them be best friends. Good luck
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Old 11-06-2003, 02:28 PM   #3
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Hi Slaughter17
Funny but I had a conversation just yesterday on this subject. I did a diploma in graphic design a few years ago. There were 12 of us in the class & 5 came under the Virgo sign! - very creative, precise & picky people. I also discovered that quite a few of us had imaginary friends when we were little.

I did a bit of research & all the stuff I found said that people who have imaginary friends tend to be very creative & there we all were doing this graphic design diploma, so I'll go with that theory.


I've also read that kids can be far more psychic than adults & pick up on stuff we tend to lose as we get older, unless we keep using it.

I really don't think you have anything to worry about.

Best wishes.
Lidia

 
Old 11-06-2003, 03:14 PM   #4
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My son reminds me of your daughter, Try not to take things so seriously. Maybe you are right. Who knows. Does it really matter. Would you love her any less or more. My mother in law always makes a huge deal out of things when my 3 year old says something and it comes true. Sometimes I even thinks she reads a lot into things. I don't know what to think about it. My son is very ahead of the game also. I used to focus on that but then I realized he just like any other kid, besides he has the rest of his life to be labeled. My plan: just to keep loving him.

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Old 11-06-2003, 04:29 PM   #5
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My son was about 2 1/2 when he became friends with "friend bad guy" He is an only child and most of his time he spent with me. It was often cute to see him talking to Friend bad guy in his room or setting up a place at the table for him. sometimes though when he would start giggling out of nowhere because friend bad guy was "peeing on the carpet" it became a little disturbing, but when he started day care around age 4, friend bad guy "went back home"
My son is 9 now and we laugh about it sometimes, I think it was just his creativeness coming out. No harm at all. Just make sure to potty train the imaginary friends too!

 
Old 11-11-2003, 07:44 AM   #6
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Laura79 HB User
Slaughter-

I just read your post, and I think it is wonderful that your daughter has her "imaginary" friend! My daugher is 19 months old. For the past month, she has been watching the ceiling, pointing, laughing and saying "hi" to someone or something. She is very smart for her age too..she knows how to count to 10, some of her colors, shapes and all the animals and their sounds. I walked into her room one day and she was laughing and looking up towards the ceiling. I asked her what she was laughing at, she said, "boy" and pointed up. I don't really believe in "imaginary" friends...I believe children and animals can sense and even see things that we cannot. The family jokes around now about it and thinks it is neat that our daughter has a "guardian angel" watching over her. I wouldn't let your daughter's friend worry you. She probably has a friend watching over her too.
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Old 11-11-2003, 08:49 AM   #7
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Thanks so much for all the replies! I feel better about the whole thing. I too believe that children and animals can sense things that adults cannot. I am not worried about her friend anymore, She is still the same little girl. I just need to include "Lolly" also. My mother thinks she is talking to my dad. I am not sure about that, but I know he comes around and checks on her from time to time. Thanks again for listening to me.
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Old 11-11-2003, 11:01 PM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by slaughter17
Thanks so much for all the replies! I feel better about the whole thing. I too believe that children and animals can sense things that adults cannot. I am not worried about her friend anymore, She is still the same little girl. I just need to include "Lolly" also. My mother thinks she is talking to my dad. I am not sure about that, but I know he comes around and checks on her from time to time. Thanks again for listening to me.

It sounds like you might be parenting "Indigo" children. If you're curious, look them up on the web.

A simple test is most Indigo's see aura's. People's spirit selves that glow in a myriad of colors. All you do is ask her, " So Honey, do you see colors around people? What color is momma today? What color is daddy?" And ask her repetitively. Ask her to color a picture of some one, and see what colors she chooses for them.

Some of it is a childish whim.. likeing colors. Over time it will become more specific and defined. I know. My daughter does the same thing. I never believed in Indigo's before I gave birth to her. She does all the same things your children do, and then some. She's also 5, so shes much more articulate and can explain thought in a more logical pattern so its easier to understand.

On a rare occasion she draws my attention to some one, "Oh Mamma, he's sad." And the gent she is referring to is laughing and joking. I ask her how she knows she says, " He's all grey." Or. I dont like that man, he's black!" And its a clearly caucasion person she's referring to and she says, "No, his light. Its black." And I take her away from the kind-seeming man handing out a shopping cart as fast as I can!

 
Old 11-17-2003, 06:43 AM   #9
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I just had to respond to this!! First of all, my 2 year old has been talking to little friend named "Bio", strange name huh?? I guess it never really bothered me. I would actually talk to him about "Bio" and see exactly how he saw his friend and what his friend was doing. I would notice that my son was taking the more adult role in the realtionship and was telling "Bio" things that I, as his Mother, would tell him. Very interesting!! My son is now almost 3 and "Bio" continues to hang around our house. I also wanted you to know that I had an imaginary friend myself. Its funny, cause I remember what he looked like, where he slept, what he did, and the things I did with him. Trust me, the fact that I had an imaginary friend never affected me in any way. Some say its a sign of creativity, some say that its a classic occurance if the child is an only child or is competeing for attention in a multi-child family. I really dont think this is grounds for panic or trips to the psychologist. He or she may grow out of it in months or years, but eventually other things will take over and their friend will disappear. I also have to tell you all to rent a movie called "Drop Dead Fred"!! This movie is adorable and will really put a new perpesctive on the lives of children and their imaginary friends.

Im sorry for getting so chatty, but I just wanted to put a lighter twist on the subject and let anyone whos afraid of their children having "friends" to let the phase play itself out and become active and interested in their perspective on the imaginary world.

Saph

Last edited by Sapphire926; 11-17-2003 at 06:43 AM.

 
Old 11-21-2003, 04:59 PM   #10
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Re: 2 1/2 year old with imaginary friend...This is kinda long

Hi...I know you posted this a few weeks ago, but I just thought I'd comment too since my 4 year old daughter has several imaginary friends. I don't think any of them have friends, but she carries on some elaborate conversations and I love to listen to them. She is a bit of a dictator and will scold them when they do something wrong! I'll hear her talking in the back seat while we're driving and when I say, "what did you say?", she responds with, "I'm not talking to you." She gets very dramatic in her conversations and I think it is a very healthy form of creative expression.

My daughter is also very creative - she loves to draw, paint and write-these are her passions! She is also very bright and is in a pre-K program at a private elementary school and we're already having problems with her getting bored. She does everything so much faster than the other kids, that waiting for them to finish their turns is a real struggle for her!

I know this is long, but I want to share this with you so you'll know you're really not alone! When my daughter was about 2, we were in a restaurant and an elderly lady kept staring at her. I was used to this because she has been a magnet for people since the day she was bored, but it just puts me on my guard a lot! As this lady was leaving the restaurant, she came over and told me that my daughter was very special. I said I thought so too and she said, "No, you can't begin to know how special she is. She will change the world one day. She has a very important job to do and will impact the world in a big way." This floored me because someone else had told me when she was about 4 months old that she would have a big impact on world peace one day and that she had a very specific, important purpose in this world." We accidentally told her a little about the events of 9/11 and she informed us that the "people who are in those other countries looking for the bad guys need my help and I need to go help them, but I can't drive there." Thankfully, she still has her childish humor!!

I believe there are many, many children in this world with extra special gifts of some sort. I think it's important, though, not to dwell on the gifts and just let them be the beautiful children that they are and we need to just do the best we can as parents to keep them safe and teach them to be the best people they can be.

Good Luck!

 
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