My 3 year old daughter has had a lot of issues with constipation and fissures. In turn she has been holding in her bowel movements. It is starting to affect how she functions and I'm getting very concerned. She seems to be holding it in longer and longer each time. When she feels the urge she will go lay down until it passes. It happens several times a day and even when we are out or when she's in school. He teachers tell me she has not been her usual self. She does not have any fun because she is always dealing with this. I give her Miralax but with this she has explosive bowel movements. I can't find a medium. It's one extreme or the other. What can I do to get her to go when she needs to?
This probably ins't the best way to handle it, but if I were in your shoes, I would have something she really loves ready ( like a cup cake or a lolipop ) and tell her once she does her potty she can have what ever the incentive is.
When you see the familiar signs, you have to get her on the toilet. Then sit with her and try to distract her while she is having the movement by reading a book together, singing, or playing simon says. Make her stay on the toilet until she has the movement.
Once she knows that she doesn't leave the bathroom until she has completed the mission she will probably begin to go quicker and once she is regulated again she will see can can pass them without pain and it should get easier.
My oldest son, who is now 12, went through the same thing at about the same age. He would start holding it in for so long he would get constipated and then it would hurt for him to go and then he would be too scared to go. I tried everything and nothing worked until my doctor suggested mineral oil. It was amazing. It would make his bm's so soft he couldn't hold it in. After about one week of giving him the oil, we never had any problems again. And this was a battle we had fought for about a year. It doesn't have a taste, but the oil isn't the easiest thing to get down. I would mix 2 tablespoons in orange juice or applesauce, twice a day. Good luck!
My Daughter would hold in her BM's also. She started about the time she was 2.5. I took her to many Peds and they didn't know what to tell me , just that she was constipated. If I had known better I would have insisted on getting a referal to a ped GI doc. She would not go for weeks at a time. Her little tummy was so hard and swollen and she didn't want to eat more than a few bites. We had her on mineral oil for a little bit and it made her have diarrhea. Also made her hair start falling out. I read that mineral oil strips all vitamins and minerals form the body. Long story short, we beagn potty training her but we didn't push the poop thing beacuse it was already such a major issue. Eventually she went on the potty one day and ever since then she hasn't had any major problems. I'm in no way saying that it was overnight, she took a long time to get regular. She would go once a week maybe, and then once every 5 days, until finally she would go every day. She was about 5 before it all ended. I understand your frustration, it is something so stupid yet so worrisome. I have heard of a few moms since then who have the same issues with their daughters. All of them say that their daughters are high strung, emotional, and need to be in control. My daughter is the same. Perhaps it is a control issue, thats all they can control at this point. I wish you all the best and know that you are not alone.
Thanks for the replies. She has been doing a bit better. I think she is realizing that she feels much better after she goes. I'm still giving her Mirilax but in smaller amounts and trying to get her to eat more fiber. Dannysmom, I think you are right about the control issue. She does always seem to want control. She has been going on the toilet since 20 months so that isn't an issue.