Re: I think my 10 yr old son has ODD
It's hard to advise on the situation as I don't know the ins and outs of your family life. I've seen things in the waiting room of mental health. Little boys yelling "I hate you" at their mothers and the mothers saying calmly I hate you right back. Some think its an effective way of parenting when in fact it's not. They go in because they believe their child has add/ADHD and leave disappointed. It's just bad parenting. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying your a bad parent in any way. What I'm getting at was maybe there was a mistake made somewhere along the line and possibly continued to be made and corrective action could be taken. Perhaps I could be very wrong, ther could possibly be something wrong, who knows?
My daughter, now 8 went through a very brief (and when I say brief I mean very brief) phase of not wanting to get her own drinks and plates. It is customary in our house for me to fix my husbands plate. He sits at the head of the table. My daughter is now old enough to fix her own plate, I fix my own, my husband gets his drink, he gets mine. She gets her own drink. She eats from children's plastic dinnerware, it is not breakable. The buffet table is low enough to where reaching everything is not a problem. She would sit at the table and demand to be fed and drink set before her, as if she were a baby again. We asked her how old she was, she answered proudly, 8! When then asked her how late do 8 year old stay up. 8 o'clock. This went on for a bit until we got to the final question. Do 8 year olds fix their own plates and drinks? "But I like the way mommy does it" my husband replies with "Do you like the way mommy cooks it? Because you won't know if you don't make a plate." He then got up and acted like he was going to eat it all.
We have our bumps along the road. My daughter hates water. So I bought zero calorie sugar free kool aid. She's a water addict now. She has eczema but hates aquaphor so I put her prescription cream in a bottle and wrote slug slime on it. She puts it on regularly now (gross). Sometimes the most difficult problem has the simplest solution.