Ever since I was little, my normally-sunny mood would disintegrate if I got too tired. Growing up, this was "managed" by early bedtimes and daily naps...a luxury in the life of a busy professional.
Last week I had one of my "meltdowns", prompting my internist to put me on an antidepressant. Now, I've tried any number of them in the past to no avail (and gained 70 pounds in the process), and I'm not at all convinced I'm depressed, bipolar, etc...I'm EXHAUSTED.
My internist has done every test and sent me to specialists and the only medical source of possible fatigue they found is anemia. I've been on 325mg iron three times a day for several months and my levels have increased, and yet...still tired.
I also have chronic pain issues (which I believe also cause physical and mental fatigue, personally), and found long ago that taking 1/2 a Percodan boosts my energy level slightly, making me feel almost "normal"...for about 15 minutes, followed by a horrible crash.
I am getting injections in my neck for one of the two pain issues next week and would really like to get off the narcotic pain meds, as the rollercoaster ride only worsens the fatigue.
Getting to my point, have any of you been diagnosed with depression rather than chronic fatigue and treated with psych meds? If so, did they help? I hate the side effects of them, and I don't understand prescribing them for fatigue UNLESS that fatigue is definitely depression-related, and I just don't think mine is.
My internist is sending me to a psychiatrist next week in an effort to determine a "which came first, the chicken or the egg?" sort of thing: do I have depression that is causing fatigue, or do I have chronic fatigue that has gone untreated for over 20 years now and am totally exhausted, which "looks" like depression b/c I'm more easily overwhelmed than someone who is well-rested would be?
I'm also being referred for a sleep study; even with 5mg of Ambien at night, I just don't sleep well and am up several times a night. My son was up studying last night and I went into his room at 1:30am to ask if his younger brother could use his flip flops at the beach today...which tells me I was fretting about that prior to waking up. My younger son said I came downstairs at 2:30 and worked on laundry for half an hour...Ambien amnesia.
I hope I am making sense; I'm sure many of you have wrestled with this issue, and I appreciate your input greatly. After all the hoops I've already jumped through, I had hoped my doctor would at least let me try dextroamphetamine to get through the work day (and maybe even have enough energy to make dinner for my sons), but she won't write for it until a psychiatrist rules out depression. I know she is just being cautious, but all the stress of visits to specialists, spending more money, and missing more work just adds to the exhaustion and makes me more prone to "meltdowns".
Lastly, she mentioned putting me on Provigil once my "moods are regulated", but I've read it causes hair loss and I really don't want to go there! I have read as much as possible and it seems like dextroamphetamine might be the better option.
Depression feels close to being possessed by an evil spirit. It takes you so out of your "normal" state of mind. It's like something else is taking control of it. And all you want to do is cry and over dramatize every problem.
What's a meltdown? Are you getting upset and crying over your health problems? I don't think that means your depressed. It's more so probably just having a hard time dealing with the health issues. Which is perfectly normal.
So sorry, but I have had a similar problem. I been on depression meds for years and helped for a while but they have had to change them around several times but I'm not really noticing any difference. I stay tired all the time. Most of the time I sleep all day, then sleep all night too. I feel like I am sleeping my life away, and am still tired. A visit to the doctor wipes me out completely. My doctor also feels I need to have a sleep study done. I have had several of these thru the years and they never show any sleeping disorder. I was watching a program one day and chronic fatigue syndrome came up and it sounded so much like a lot of my problems. I don't know how to get a doctor to understand this and how frustrating it is. My current doctor just kinda laughed it off and said, "well we all have that". From my understanding, I don't think most doctors believe in this and the ones that do say there is no cure. Do what you can on your good days.
Sometimes I wish I could rest when I want/need to, but the reality is that I'm a single mom who drives 60 miles round-trip to work each day and holds down a very busy, responsible position. I'm sure all of this contributes not only to the daily all-consuming fatigue, but also the "meltdowns", which are the times when I just get so overwhelmed by my circumstances that I have a crying spell or panic attack. It passes quickly enough b/c I am optimistic by nature, but not having any REAL answers or plan of treatment really bothers me.
My internist wants to try me on Provigil once any psych issues are ruled out, so perhaps that will help. Maybe the sleep study will give us some clues as well, though I haven't scheduled it yet.
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