Re: How keep people from rejecting me for CFS and FM?
I am so sorry you are not only suffering physically, but emotionally as well. I have an idea of how you feel. My back was injured 18 yrs ago and after 4 spinal surgeries, I still suffer terribly. I also think I have some other issues going on with muscle and joint pain. I have a loving fam...parent, 3 sisters, a husband and 2 younger children. My fam has always known what I have gone through with my surgeries and such, yet some of them don't acknowledge that anything is wrong with me. My sister ( who happens to live the closest) for whatever reason has always made comments about me...for example, I have to lay down a good bit and thanks to my wonderful husband, I don't have to get up with the kids in the morning for school...if my sister calls, she'll usually say "oh what, is she still in the rack." When I'm around her shell say things like " we'll we all can't be like (me) and lay around in the rack all day. A number of yrs ago when I had one of my surgeries where I wasn't going to be able to do anything for 6 weeks, she never stopped by, didn't see if we needed anything, and we live 2 miles away. Meanwhile, someone in her neighborhood wife left him and she's making them dinners.
I went to therapy about my chronic pain and didn't even realize how much the comments and such bothered me. I have a disability place card for my car, my father once jumped out before I pulled in the spot out of embaresment, my sister another time told me I shouldn't park there because there are people who actually need it.
Some people obviously have issues admitting that someone in their fam, has a physical problem....especially when it's not fully evident when you look at them. As my therapist said, it's their problem not ours. It is their issue, they don't want to deal with it and its a cop out on their part...perhaps they don't want to face something. Just know you have done nothing wrong and it's not your responsibility to make them understand. Of my 3 sisters, only 1 will ever ask me how I'm feeling and I think that's because she has struggled with things in her life. My mother , husband, and children have always, and no doubt will always, support and encourage me. I know my father cares about me, occasionally he'll mention something about seeing a new dr or when he twinges his back, he makes a comment that he can't imagine how I must feel everyday.
You do what's best for you. If you haven't spoken to a therapist yet, I would suggest doing so. It will help you not worry so much about what they think and let you focus on. You and your children. Good luck