Yes, life is good since my med increases but now I have to watch for overdoing which is exactly what I did Saturday and I have been paying the price since.
I walked an outlet mall -- I know - INSANE!! But you have to realize I have not been able to do this in four years. Okay, I get the stupid award of the year. But hey I got 5 pairs of shoes to go with that award!!
This has made me realize that my meds are powerful and I don't have the pain but I still have the underlying spinal mechanical issues. Those problems are still going to cause me problems because they have not gone away. My meds made me forget that little fact.
If you have not already figured it out, I am a type A individual. Really, honestly! I often can plow thru things so pain meds can probably be dangerous for me in this aspect.
Sunday, I was in pain but not pain. Meaning I could feel the soreness and feel the pain but not feel it. Not to mention I was beyond exhausted. Most intelligent people would have stayed home and rested but I am not the smartest cookie in the world I went to church and was totally wiped out for the remainder of the day.
Yesterday, Monday, I hung around the house and baked cookies with the munchkins. Then Monday after the pain hit me...I felt pain and had to take a breakthru - 10 mg. of oxycontin. I remained in my heated recliner the remainder of the night and contemplated what all this means.
I have decided:
*I don't have strength and need to build up slowly.
*Meds are a good thing and allow us to do more.
*Meds can be a bad thing because they allow us to do more.
*My underlying problems are still present.
*I have to figure out what moderation means.
*I am thankful to have pain meds.
*This is the first time in a week I had to take a BT.
Today, my pain is better but gosh am I wiped. I think I have alot to learn.
This isn't a matter of intelligence. It's more live and learn. And thank God you get to do this.
You need to keep in mind that you are not in shape. Pain has robbed you of conditioning. The years of suffering and inactivity takes a heavy toll and you need to work at regaining strength and endurance. This is one reason why, after my heart failure last year and the subsequent weight loss, I asked my doc to OK taking a preventative dose of BT meds so I could work out. I needed the same as you do now or I would just be injuring myself each time I put out.
Talk to your new PM about strength and endurance exercises. And remember that the return to conditioning will take time. Even after more than a year at this I am still not to where I want to be. I still fall short of my desired ability and it gets frustrating. So you need to set realistic goals and be patient.
I bet a few months ago thoughts of exercise were non-existent. See what I mean about a whole new outlook on life? Start slow and go slow and soon you'll be doing more and paying less for it. None of us can hope to return to the strength of our youth, and there's much we should no longer even consider doing, but we should do what we can - and we'll feel so much better for it.
This is an ongoing thing for me. I can some really good days and then boom!
Moderation is the key! It's harder for others to understand that I can have good days and bad days because on my good days no one can tell that I have pain.
Just the ongoing struggles of a cper.....it's always something!!!
undiagnosed lung and back pain after pneumonia in '03, tmj, migraines,(two failed surgeries for) Kienbock's disease
Moderation, moderation, moderation. That said, way to go on the shoe count! Maybe for now just do part and do some more another day. I can certainly understand getting carried away if you haven't been for 4 years though.
Looks like you can join Imelda Marcus with the shoe collection, boy it was great to be able to do it.
Yes its like the mind wants to keep going but the body cant. Of course you feel it, the meds are masking it and making you able to do stuff. But the muscles are now so weak, just like my own. Think you are right about doing the strengthing exercises, even if it is in the recliner lifting a bag of sugar or a water bottle up in the air and back down again. You would be surprised how tired your arms gets. At the moment as I have weak hamstrings my exercises are lying on the floor and raising you leg up and hold for 20 sec down for 10secs and repeat 20 times.
But diet despite everything bet you feel you have a life back again...... I am so happy for you, you truely deserve this pain relief. take care my pet,
Pepper darlin', I have to echo everyone else's advice. I know how tempting it can be to just jump right back on that horse and ride away like the old days, but remember, as Steve (I think) said in a post a while back, you have been through a kind of war, of sorts. And you have many residual effects from this war. When our bodies have been through so much, we have to go very slowly, and build up our strength and endurance. I know, even after 8 years of this, I have days when I feel like I can do more than I actually can. But, I have learned to take a step back, and ask myself some questions first.
Have I built up enough strength over the past few days/weeks to be able to accomplish this task? Am I prepared to deal with the payback that is inevitable? Is there some way that I can do some of this today, and finish it tomorrow or the next day? Is this task really necessary and/or worth the payback?
I think, eventually, this process will become second nature to you. But for now, please just experiment, slowly and cautiously, so that you can learn to listen to exactly what your body is telling you. Congrats on the shoes! I think the last time that I bought new shoes, they were more slippers. I've gotten to a point where I look at a pair of heels and cringe! It's been a loooong time!
Sending lots of prayers and hugs your way, girl! CMP/MM
Put my two cents worth in. My brain says to tell you to take it easy, don't overdo, be careful......but my heart says, YOU GO GIRL!!! 5 pairs of shoes? Well, you had to make up for lost time . They ARE all flats, right? Well Pepper, do take it easy, but being a Type A myself I know how hard that can be! I'm so happy for you!
Pepper, I was knew this would happen. Since most of us would do the same if we were in your shoes. I hate to say it, but I agree. moderation.
I am always enforcing that a rule at work, to do everything in moderation which makes me feel like a fraud because I struggle with that myself. Then again I have valid excuse being ADHD, but even I am learning.
Still I cant contain how happy I am for you. I so look forward to hearing how you are enjoying more of a pain free lifestyle. We know that the meds are just a bandaide so to speak, my PM makes sure I realize that. Its hard when you have good days to not try to do something that you have been wanting to do.
Four pair of shoes? I am jealous, shoes & purses are my weak spot. I do not allow myself to go into a shoe store to often, then again I am a budget freak & only look at clearance shoes unless its a huge sale. I will admitt I broke down & bought 3 purses this summer, which I can go with out buying one for along time. I was feeling blue & wanted to cheer myself up. Even my husbund raised his eyes at the last one I bought. He knows I normally wont spend much on me, just this past summer I have bought myself some things.
I pretty much told him I have worked hard & I waited till the dang purse went on clearance so I was getting it & that was that. I hope you enjoy your new shoes. Please slow down abit.
I have been wanting to ask you what your families reaction to all of this?
I know they must be thrilled, but I'll bet there is alot of smiling faces at your house these days & I am so happy for you & your family. Sammy
Pepper...or I think I'll start calling you "Peppy", because you've got your Pep back!!! I just can't even put into words how happy I am for you. You deserve every pair of shoes, and I am elated that you got to go to church! Isn't God good? You've finally been able to join "life" again. I know you are so thankful. Does your family comment on the positive change in you?