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Old 11-06-2010, 04:35 PM   #1
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How to Handle Discouragement

Hey all,

I was wondering what people do when the pain is really beginning to discourage them? Today I saw a friend who is a chronic pain patient and they finally diagnosed her and they've been giving her the painkillers she needs and she's been moving around and getting up and everything so much better than she has in about a year. She looks great and she seems really chipper. And here I am with my pain spiking in ridiculous ways the past two months and I mean I feel so happy for her and am just overjoyed that her pain is coming down and she can do things again, but it was also so very discouraging. I just came up and laid down on the couch and started crying.

So what do you all do when you feel discouraged about your pain?

Resa

 
Old 11-06-2010, 08:45 PM   #2
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Re: How to Handle Discouragement

What a great question!

I am living with several major illnesses, kidney faliure, strokes, heart attack, and recently endometriosis requiring narcotic pain management.

I rely on positive thoughts, such as.. the arrival of my son from school, a phone call to an old friend, sitting outside on nice days, write a letter, checking in here...I break my days up into tiny little pieces, and keep my tasks small as well.

I think long range thinking makes everything daunting and overwhelming., where as focusing on all the tiny good things that happen to us each day gives us a sense of belonging and participating in life.

I imagine your friend did not enjoy the pain relief since the beginning, she has likely been through several adjustments of her medications, and committed time to each one. I encourage you to devote the same time and trials to get your medications working just as well as your friends....it does happen!

You can always drop by here, there is always someone who could use a listening ear...

 
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Old 11-07-2010, 06:03 AM   #3
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Re: How to Handle Discouragement

I know the feeling! My pain doctor decided to take my Cymbalta away. No reason, just "let's try getting rid of these". The PA didn't understand why either so she tried another NSAID. It didn't work so she put me back on the Cymbalta. All this time my blood glucose has been going nuts. This morning it was 240 before breakfast. So, my pain is up, my sugar is up and I feel like crap. But, I will go to church and try to stay away from some of "those" people. As much as I want to just to back to bed, I will participate in life today!

 
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Old 11-07-2010, 02:39 PM   #4
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Re: How to Handle Discouragement

Thanks to both of you for the encouragement.

I think it's going to take some time to adjust my train of thought, but I am going to try hard to just stay positive. I went to church today because I really try not to let the pain control my life. I still feel discouraged when I sit somewhere I used to be able to stay for hours and not have any problems, now I can only be there for a few minutes and I'm dying to go back home.

Once again, I appreciate your encouragement.

Resa

 
Old 11-07-2010, 04:29 PM   #5
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Re: How to Handle Discouragement

It does take time and commitment, but once you start seeing things in more of a positive light, it will become easier, eventually second nature.

I find myself stopping when confronted with a situation and deciding which way I am going to react, the positive way, or the negative way. If I respond without thought it may be instantly negative, but just the momentary thought of reacting in a positive way becomes much more sensible, with positive results.

 
Old 11-07-2010, 04:35 PM   #6
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Re: How to Handle Discouragement

Good Evening Friends,
When I get discouraged I remind myself that this is a temporary situation. My feeling is that if they could put a man on the moon, they can take care of my pain.
When I was at my worst I used to remind myself of how lucky I am to be living in the greatest country in the world, in a wonderful area, that I'm married to the most wonderful man in the world, that I have two amazing kids, a job that I'm passionate about, and a great and loving family. In other words, I count my blessings. In addition I remind myself that I'm in control of my health, and I do everything possible to lessen the pain. In addition to taking my meds I meditate, read, use ice, do stretching exercises, and whatever else I can do to feel better.
I also think of things my parents taught me. For example, "For every problem, there is a solution". Then there's, "No matter what happens we must keep our sense of humor". I also recall my parents stories of when they were young, and how difficult it was living through the Great Depression, and World War II.
There's an old Irish story about a group of people who were complaining about their problems. God gathered them in a circle and had everyone tell the group their own problems, and then one by one they put their problems in the middle of the circle. When they were finished, God told the people to go into the middle of the circle and take any problem they wanted. When all was said and done, every one took their own problems back.
I've learned to put my pain into perspective. Yes, it's difficult at the moment, but in the big picture of life, it's a small matter.
I hope that my sharing helps someone.
Feel better,
Peggy

 
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Old 11-07-2010, 07:11 PM   #7
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Re: How to Handle Discouragement

Peggy, I wish I could have your attitude. I know God won't let us handle any more than we are able. I also know He likes to push the limit!

 
Old 11-07-2010, 07:47 PM   #8
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Re: How to Handle Discouragement

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Originally Posted by Frederick123 View Post
Peggy, I wish I could have your attitude. I know God won't let us handle any more than we are able. I also know He likes to push the limit!
Frederick,
Thank you for the compliment. I agree with your comment about God pushing the limit. In reply to God doesn't give us more than we can handle, I say, but I wish he wouldn't trust me so much.
Have a great week.
Peggy

 
Old 11-08-2010, 08:02 PM   #9
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Re: How to Handle Discouragement

I agree. Sometimes I feel like I am being pushed to the limit and I have to remind myself that God's grace is sufficient enough for me. I tell myself that over and over whenever I am feeling especially down.

I am trying to not thinking about the big picture of me being in pain the past seven years and how much longer I could be in pain, but just look ahead to what tomorrow may bring. It really makes it much easier for me to be more positive about everything. And I have to remind myself that there are so many good things in life despite the fact that I hurt. Such as I have such a great supportive family, many great loving friends, and despite everything I am doing fantastic in school. I just have to remember there is more to life than pain.

Thank you everyone for your words of encouragement. They mean more than I can say.

Resa

 
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Old 11-09-2010, 12:03 PM   #10
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Re: How to Handle Discouragement

Hi Resa, I know how hard it can be, but hang in there. It took me 15 years in pain management before I found the doctor I have now and went on methadone, which gave me back a life I thought was gone forever. I promise you won't have to wait that long, doctors are more and more being better educated about pain control, it is much easier to find a doctor to help you than it used to be.

May I ask who treats your chronic pain now? Maybe you could try switching to your primary doctor, thats who treats me, or can you switch to the same doctor your friend has? It's okay to have a good cry, just remember tomorrow is another day, and we will always be here for you. Take care, Fabby

 
Old 11-09-2010, 03:25 PM   #11
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Re: How to Handle Discouragement

Hi Fabby and Resa..I'm having an extremely hard time with my pain management and the doctors. I've been told about methadone and at this point, I think that's the only thing that is going to help me but finding a doctor that would prescribe it is a whole nother story. My regular doc freaked when I asked about it. I've tried hydrocodone, lyrica, oxycodone, fentanyl patches, and now zanaflex and anti depressants....which I can't take. So I agree about being pushed to the limit and worse, feeling so helpless. jusbeth

 
Old 11-10-2010, 03:08 PM   #12
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Re: How to Handle Discouragement

Hi! I am amazed that so many doctors will prescibe other strong meds like the patch, but not methadone, which is cheap and works really well. It does take more watching by the doctors, they have to titrate you on and off of it very slowly, because methadone acts differently than other opiates, and you need an EKG once in awhile, but the results are so worth it. If I were you I would keep looking for a doctor that will let you try it, or try and educate your doctor on it although some doctors freak out if we mere mortals presume to tell them anything, lol. Good luck and hang in there!
~Fabby

 
Old 11-10-2010, 06:03 PM   #13
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Re: How to Handle Discouragement

Hello Friends,
The other day I wrote about how God never gives us more than he can handle, but sometimes I wish he wouldn't trust me so much. Well, he zapped me again.
I went to work on Monday morning, feeling fine, in a great mood. Within 2 hours I was in the hospital. I was having a stroke. You betcha, one minute I was fine, the next I was having trouble getting my words out.
The good news is... the stroke was mild, minor, and the only lasting side effect is some speech deficits. You can understand me, but it doesn't sound like me. I'm home, and doing well. I can go back to work next week.
I learned one more time that we never know what will happen, that we have to take each day as a blessing, and live life to the fullest.
I know that I was off topic a bit, thanks for letting me share.
Peggy

 
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Old 11-12-2010, 04:32 AM   #14
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Re: How to Handle Discouragement

Quote:
Originally Posted by Fabrashamx View Post
Hi! I am amazed that so many doctors will prescibe other strong meds like the patch, but not methadone, which is cheap and works really well. It does take more watching by the doctors, they have to titrate you on and off of it very slowly, because methadone acts differently than other opiates, and you need an EKG once in awhile, but the results are so worth it. If I were you I would keep looking for a doctor that will let you try it, or try and educate your doctor on it although some doctors freak out if we mere mortals presume to tell them anything, lol. Good luck and hang in there!
~Fabby
**
Fabby, I totally agree with you..on everything. Heaven help us if we try to tell a DOCTOR that we know more about our pain and what we need, than they do. But that's the doctor I've got. So yes, I'm still looking, but dealing with this without any pain meds in the meantime is more than hard to deal with. But thank you. jusbeth

 
Old 11-17-2010, 02:38 AM   #15
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Re: How to Handle Discouragement

I appreciate this thread. Most certainly when we are in in active flare up and get so down. I do think it is a cycle thing, that we get down because of the active flare up.
Life can throw you bad curves to no matter what time of year, even worse as the holidays approach.
My sis whom i dearly love is also dealing with many things we are dealing with.
Her family though has great health insurance and a job. She got to go in for some spinal injections that really helped her. I was so happy she got to go in for treatment, not worry about the cost. She also still manages to work full time an amazing lady.
Recently my husband got a pink slip. Already had been in active stage of my situation , Bad flare ups and can not go in because of lack of health care.
Frederick123, i really get what you are trying to say about nada more then we can handle. However there comes a point like the op stated, it does get dark dreary. Fred glad you recognized there is a direct correlation between flare ups with pain and high sugar readings, Regardless of how well or how careful we were eating.
While some folks here mentioned the tricks and faith, it truly becomes one moment at a time. One pain wave at a time, deep breathing....
A while back before the holidays i started a long thread on how as a chronic pain person deal with the extras. This year i did one of the things on the list.
The few folks we shop fore did it early got it all done and sent a short note, stating in these times this was the way we could do things....
So my encouragment to op and each other one pain wave moment at a time.

 
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