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Old 03-21-2008, 12:54 PM   #1
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bazhan HB User
i miss my wife so much will i see her again when i die

i miss my wife so much will i see her again when i die. my wife lost her battle with cancer one month ago in wakefield hospice she only went in for pain relief but she got worse and died i was with her on the 21/2/2008 i know i will ever get over this as i loved her so much we was together 30 yrs we were only 16 when we meet and it was love at first sight all i want at this time is to go to her but the only problem is what people say that if you commit suicide i will not go to her as i right this letter i can smell her in the room with me i know what i want to do and i know i will do it as when my wife dyed all my fear about death went and im not afraid of dying no more im relay looking forward to it it will sound silly to a lot but its what i want as every time i close my eyes i see her every time i go out i see her i wake up at night crying as i want to be with her so much . i would like to say a very big thank you to the hospice for all the loving care they give to my wife thank you all barry

 
Old 03-21-2008, 10:38 PM   #2
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Re: i miss my wife so much will i see her again when i die

Hello,
I'm so very sorry for your lose, right now it's all so very new, your still in shock, it's really hard to funtion. I was very close to my dad and when he died, I was a mess, I had a knot in my stomach for three months, I cried daily, I did not sleep well and the littlest thing that reminded me of him brought tears. But then there is a side I did find comfort in and that was he is up in heaven and he is not sick anymore, he is not suffering anymore, that also applies to your wife, she is up in heaven and she is not sick and suffering from cancer anymore. Do you have any children? If so, they need you, they need there Dad more than you know, I think you need to talk to a minter or councler, reach out to them, they can help you.
Karen

 
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Old 03-22-2008, 03:30 PM   #3
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LostN07 HB User
Re: i miss my wife so much will i see her again when i die

Well no one knows for sure until we die. but is death worth the chance of NOT being with her? And living in sheer torture forever? Its far worse than living without her death I can assure you.
I know how you feel I burried my little boy last summer. There are moments im ready to die and mornings I dont want to wake up.
This is normal grieving. You need to talk to someone a prefessional. They might make you feel better.
Please know your not alone and God has his reasons though we may not understand them.

 
Old 03-31-2008, 01:06 PM   #4
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MissB999 HB User
Re: i miss my wife so much will i see her again when i die

Hi Barry

I saw your post and it touched me greatly. I am so very sorry for your loss and the pain you feel. We lost my Grandfather in November last year and Im seeing my Nan and Mum miss him terribly. All I can say is that your family need you and that Im sure your wife is watching over you and hoping you will be strong.
Rachel
x

 
Old 04-01-2008, 10:38 PM   #5
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Re: i miss my wife so much will i see her again when i die

I am sorry for your loss.

It is believed that when we die, It will just seem like we left our loved one that died before us, just a finger snap ago.

Like we never left them.

There is no sense of time in the afterlife, like we have when we are alive.

Even if our loved one died young, and we grow old to be 80 then die, it will be like we never left them.....so it's said.

But we won't know until we die ourselves.

Last edited by NewYawk; 04-02-2008 at 08:00 AM.

 
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Old 04-11-2008, 09:55 PM   #6
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Re: i miss my wife so much will i see her again when i die

You will see her again when you die. I promise you that. I'm pretty sure that there's an afterlife. I don't believe that atheists are right. There has to be an afterlife otherwise this life is meaningless. Your wife is watching over you and waiting for you to meet her in heaven. Just trust god that he's taking good care of her right now, and will take care of you. Death is something that we don't want to go through, but we have to. One day we will all be dead and gone, but our spirits will live on for eternity. Your wife is in a better place now and just remember that this life goes by with a blink of an eye, but the spiritual world goes by forever. It never ends. You and your wife will meet in heaven and be married forever. How good does that sound? It sounds pretty amazing to me. Anyway, just be strong and never lose your faith in god.

We won't know the real answer until we die, but I doubt we just rot in the ground. There's so much experiences that prove there's an afterlife. I can logically prove NDE'S are real:

The brain isn't functioning. It's not there. It's destroyed. It's abnormal. But, yet, it can produce these very clear experiences ... an unconscious state is when the brain ceases to function. For example, if you faint, you fall to the floor, you don't know what's happening and the brain isn't working. The memory systems are particularly sensitive to unconsciousness. So, you won't remember anything. But, yet, after one of these experiences [a NDE], you come out with clear, lucid memories ... This is a real puzzle for science. I have not yet seen any good scientific explanation which can explain that fact.

Our hearts are heavy and light.

god bless.

 
Old 04-12-2008, 01:26 PM   #7
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Re: i miss my wife so much will i see her again when i die

Hi there...what you are feeling is a normal part of the grieving process...I have never lost a spouse to death (just divorce) which I sometimes think may be harder because in divorce the person chooses to leave us, in death they have no choice. I did however, lose my firstborn son to a tragic car accident when he was 16 years old..the pain and loss will always be with you, but I PROMISE it does fade with time.....please do not do anything rash out of your grief, your wife would not want that....you will recover, possibly love again..so please hang in there...my thoughts and prayers are with you.....ST

 
Old 04-12-2008, 04:50 PM   #8
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Re: i miss my wife so much will i see her again when i die

I'm very sorry for your loss and can totally relate to your feelings and thoughts of committing suicide to be with your loved one. Yes, the idea that it might be an unforgivable sin and that I would not be with my Ben, took those thoughts away from my head. You must not even think about this as an alternative! Your wife does live on, in another place, that someday, at the right time, you will be also. I have cried many tears and asked for signs that my Ben lived on. I received them, and am sure he is in another place and that at the right time, I will be with him again. You need to contact a grief support group,(hospice can put you in contact with one, as they did me) and also reading books by John Edwards, James Prague about life after death helped me. The next year will be very hard for you, but believe me please, it will get better. I had cried and cried, screamed that I wanted him back, but that can never be in this life. After 3 years have passed, yes, I still love and miss Ben, but my life has gone on, and I am happy again. I will always miss what I had, but I feel fortunate to have had him in my life and need to live on, as he would have wanted. Your wife also wants you to live on, for the two of you. She is with you every moment, please believe this. Reach out and get support and know that the hurt will lessen as time goes on.

 
Old 04-17-2008, 07:15 AM   #9
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Re: i miss my wife so much will i see her again when i die

hello barry.i lost my husband last october the day after his birthday and i also have had thoughts of suicide. i think i would have gone mad if it wasnt for my family ,he had his 68th birthday .he had cancer .i agreed to councelling and i found it helped.i miss him so bad that i find myself talking to him all the time ,i say goodnight to him every night .im not afraid of death anymore because i know he will be there to meet me when my time comes.i know there is an afterlife and we will all meet up again when the time is right.we were married for 46 years.i thought i was going to be ok when he went but you are never prepared for it.it is going to take time to get through it but they say it will happen.im sure you will see her again just as i will see my husband again .just keep believing .i wish you all the best. love jenny.

 
Old 04-17-2008, 10:48 PM   #10
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irena HB User
Re: i miss my wife so much will i see her again when i die

Quote:
Originally Posted by bazhan View Post
i miss my wife so much will i see her again when i die. my wife lost her battle with cancer one month ago in wakefield hospice she only went in for pain relief but she got worse and died i was with her on the 21/2/2008 i know i will ever get over this as i loved her so much we was together 30 yrs we were only 16 when we meet and it was love at first sight all i want at this time is to go to her but the only problem is what people say that if you commit suicide i will not go to her as i right this letter i can smell her in the room with me i know what i want to do and i know i will do it as when my wife dyed all my fear about death went and im not afraid of dying no more im relay looking forward to it it will sound silly to a lot but its what i want as every time i close my eyes i see her every time i go out i see her i wake up at night crying as i want to be with her so much . i would like to say a very big thank you to the hospice for all the loving care they give to my wife thank you all barry

 
Old 04-17-2008, 11:15 PM   #11
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Re: i miss my wife so much will i see her again when i die

Barry my heart goes out to you with the loss of your wife.I was so surprised to see some one from Wakefield, a place I know well, and being six thousand miles away, I send you my heartfelt sympathy. Your loss is such a short time ago, and it will get better with time, even though now you cant see life without her, she wouldn't wish for you to suffer, and take your life. One day you will be together again, till then share the grief with your family and friends, they need, and will help you too.

God Bless, and take care.

Ir-ena.

 
Old 06-14-2008, 11:09 AM   #12
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SouthernTemptress HB User
Re: i miss my wife so much will i see her again when i die

I am so sorry for your loss> I cannot imagine the difficulty you are experiencing with all this pain.
I really wish we had the choice of not dying alone as it seems some people have such a bond, they are meant to exit at the same time. You both sound like you loved eachother so much.. with that much positive energy bonding you two, who knows what may or may not be possible.

 
Old 04-24-2009, 02:01 AM   #13
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Re: i miss my wife so much will i see her again when i die

Are you still there? I feel the same. Please let me know!!

 
Old 04-24-2009, 06:32 AM   #14
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caringsister54 HB Usercaringsister54 HB Usercaringsister54 HB Usercaringsister54 HB Usercaringsister54 HB User
Re: i miss my wife so much will i see her again when i die

Barry and everyone

I had a close relationship with my Dad who I lost in 1995. After awhile he appeared to me one night and I've had numerous "visits" ever since only since I also lost my husband 4 years ago, they've been less frequent.

Here are the answers Dad gave me about what is his life in heaven like

1) First when you die and arrive in heaven, you are greeted by others you know who pre-deceased you. You are then taken to an orientation area

2) If you arrived in heaven disabled in anyway -- you find you are immediately whole. If you were blind, you now have sight. If you were deaf you now can hear. If you had a limb loss, you have all of them back

3) God's angels then ask on his behalf -- what was the age in life you were the most happiest? when you answer, you are forever that age

4) God then assigns you children being born at that moment as their guardian angel so you can never be the guardian angel of your family on earth
but you can tell their guardian angel things that will help them help the person they oversee

5) God allows them to visit on earth occasionally but their visits are brief
as there are no real time, seasons, etc in heaven. Everyday is a glorious day filled with beauty, music, arts, etc.

6) In heaven the most important thing is you are no longer part of a single family dynamic. You live in harmony with everyone else. While you have an internal stronger feeling when dealing with one person over another in heaven, its not the family 'commitment' feelings so there's no conflicts over one side of a person's family versus another. Everyone just lives together in peace -- there's no coupling or anything. God just has everyone together.

That's what Daddy shared with me. Believe it or not. I also read a good book its called "90 minutes in heaven by Don Porter" and it so helped me during my grieving time about my Mikey. He died at 48 very suddenly of heart failure in front of me.

I miss all that I loss in my life. But while the normal grieving process does have periods where we'd all love to join our loved ones simply to make our own heart-ache stop or lessen, it does pass.

Its been 4 years for me -- First I prayed that God would send me someone again so I can once again have a purpose on earth. then when he didn't answer that prayer, I changed it to God, just help me get through the next day, hour, minute. Help me cry less, enjoy my Mikey memories more, and help me learn have to be fulfilled and helpful for the rest of my life. But most of all, heal me so I can live the remainings days alone and still find happiness.

a few weeks later, I got an invite for coffee from someone within an internet dating site. I met the man, realized I knew him from somewhere -- turned out he use to work for my company many years ago and we'd pass in the hall & cafeteria but never spoke.

We started dating -- been together almost two years now. I love him and he apparently loves me but I also realize that the love I have with my new friend is nothing compared to the breath-taking love I had for my Mikey. its love but just different and maybe its because of the age I am now compared to the age I was when my Mikey came along.

I'm just trying to comfort you and others to know that there is life after death and that's what the message has been through the ages. Hang in there, write often -- I write letters to Mikey all the time, reading them again lets me know how far I've come in my grieving process.

Love
CaringSister54

 
Old 05-02-2009, 06:46 PM   #15
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misE08 HB User
Re: i miss my wife so much will i see her again when i die

I also agree...the 90 minutes in heaven book really helped me to understand the "process" and feelings of heaven and just what my daddy was experiencing and it made me feel better. I am sorry you feel so lost, if it does get better it takes time...it has been 10 mos. for my loss of daddy and I still have hard times everyday, but some days are better. I know patience is hard and times seem as though we dont think we can make it thru the next day, but with the Grace of God, the memories we have, and knowing they would not want us sad really keeps me going....plus, I can't stop living because my daddy isnt here. I have a son, a husband and a mom to take care of and that is what we must live for.
If you trust in the Lord as your personal saviour, you will see your wife again one day, WHEN its your turn for God to call you home. God Bless you. I will pray for your comfort.
Missy

 
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