| missing mom
I lost my mother a long time ago. I never actually got to know her. I don't remember her. My brothers do, they were a bit older than me. I feel angry a lot. I feel like she left me...even though I know she didn't. I still get mad sometimes. She died in a fire, along with 5 of her friends. She was 23 and the oldest - the youngest was 16. It was a housefire. Everyone was sleeping, well thats what I was told anyway. I hope she was sleeping. I hope the smoke killed her first... I hope she didn't feel any pain. God you would think I'd be so over this by now. My dad lost it after she died but he was sick before. He has scizophrenia (spelling?). It was pretty scary growing up with him. Once he set our house on fire...but something woke me up, it was all smoky - and I woke everyone else up, we all got out ok. I still get mad when I see people mistreating their moms, like you don't know what you have....I wonder why I never dream of her...
anyone else feel cheated, angry even after so long?
| 
