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Old 07-13-2010, 01:57 AM   #1
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chessypuff101 HB User
My dad might die. Financial worries!

Hey guys.

I'm so worried at the moment. I'm a 15-year-old girl, and my dad is about to recieve a stem cell transplant for his ALL Ph+. Everything (besides his age) is looking good for the transplant, but there is a high chance the leukaemia will relapse.

I'm really scared that he is going to die. Firstly and most importantly, the fact that well.. he's my dad. I've grown up with the idea that my dad is strong and can fix anything, so this is a very rude awakening for me. I don't know how I would handle the grief, let alone watch my mother handle it (just imagining my boyfriend with cancer is enough to make me cry, let alone a husband of 26 years!)

Secondly, the financial side. Dad is the breadwinner in this house - he's even been working from home/hospital through most of his treatment, to keep him occupied and to keep the income rolling (he wants to save his sick pay for when he really needs it). My mum has been a housewife for her entire life, as she has a mild learning disability, and is generally just unfit for work.

What is going to happen to our financial position if dad dies? What kind of payments can we go for (in Australia)?
I understand that I am going to be out of home in a few years (perhaps when I settle into University), so the financial side is not going to affect me dearly, but I have a 12-year-old brother who still has many years ahead of him, as well as my mum.

Thanks.

 
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Old 07-19-2010, 09:12 PM   #2
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Join Date: Feb 2010
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justmel30 HB User
Re: My dad might die. Financial worries!

I cant tell you anything about possible programs out there. I'm in the US so I dont really know anything about Australia. But as far as the grief goes, I can tell you a little about that. I lost my husband to a car accident when I was pregnant with my third son. It's been almost 3 years now, and I'm still not over it. However, it's nothing like in the movies. You dont sit in your room and cry for weeks on end, and there is no magical person who will sit next to you and help you snap out of it. It's a long process, but a quiet one if you choose to behave yourself in the middle of it. Acting out does nothing but make it worse once you realize what you've done. There are still good days.....lot's of them in fact, and more and more of them everytime I turn around. But any holliday is hard for me. It just feels fractured..........like a piece of it is missing. I can still have a good day, but I miss having him with me very much. For my kids, they were all babies when this happened. My oldest was only 5. They dont really remember a whole lot, and for teh most part, they are content. I think the most important thing to know about grief is just that it's not something you can just snap out of, but at the same time, it wont kill you so long as you dont let it. Force yourself to keep going, and better times do come.....eventually. I hope your dad ends up being ok. Good luck!
Melissa

 
Old 07-21-2010, 02:37 AM   #3
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Join Date: Jul 2010
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luvn123 HB User
Re: My dad might die. Financial worries!

Quote:
Originally Posted by chessypuff101 View Post
Hey guys.

I'm so worried at the moment. I'm a 15-year-old girl, and my dad is about to recieve a stem cell transplant for his ALL Ph+. Everything (besides his age) is looking good for the transplant, but there is a high chance the leukaemia will relapse.

I'm really scared that he is going to die. Firstly and most importantly, the fact that well.. he's my dad. I've grown up with the idea that my dad is strong and can fix anything, so this is a very rude awakening for me. I don't know how I would handle the grief, let alone watch my mother handle it (just imagining my boyfriend with cancer is enough to make me cry, let alone a husband of 26 years!)

Secondly, the financial side. Dad is the breadwinner in this house - he's even been working from home/hospital through most of his treatment, to keep him occupied and to keep the income rolling (he wants to save his sick pay for when he really needs it). My mum has been a housewife for her entire life, as she has a mild learning disability, and is generally just unfit for work.

What is going to happen to our financial position if dad dies? What kind of payments can we go for (in Australia)?
I understand that I am going to be out of home in a few years (perhaps when I settle into University), so the financial side is not going to affect me dearly, but I have a 12-year-old brother who still has many years ahead of him, as well as my mum.

Thanks.
Well first off I want to say best luck for ur dad. I hope everything goes okay. Also the financial part, that's going to be ruff. I'm. In the same situation as u. My dad is the breadmaker, and my mom is the housewife. My mother has never worked a day since she has been with my daddy (25 years). My dad has diabetis and he has always worked, and he is very sick of his liver. Its hard to see my dad still working knowing how sick he is he takes care of me and my 2 children, my sister and her 2 children, and my mother. My dad got really sick once that he couldn't work for almost a year....it was hard, we lost our cars, house,the kids didn't have what they needed, no money for my dads pills... always scared asking ourselves "what's going to happen next". So what me and my sisters did (3 sisters no brothers) was get jobs, so my dad wouldn't worry as much and just get better. So we made enough to get by, it was the worst year of my life.never in a million years did I think I would see my dad not able to provide for us, but we as a family stuck together and did everything we could to provide for ourselfs. After this yr went by and my dad is working again, my parents opened up a savings and put 1,000 every pay check. So if anything like this would ever happen again we would be prepared, so my advice to u is be strong for what ever may happen, but I promise it will get better, comfort each other and never forget "family comes first". And if u want to try to work, if not old enough do other stuff, I used to cut yards, bake and sell, make key chains....there are a lot of ways to make money. Best wishes to you.

 
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