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Old 12-05-2011, 07:52 PM   #1
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Smile End Stage of Liver Disease

My son who is 48 years old has End Stage of Liver Disease. He knows he is to blame for this problem. He had Chrossis of Liver five years ago, got better after not drinking for 2 1/2 years. He said some one had ticked him off and he was offered a beer and took it. He started drinking heavier. Then his dog, Cosmos, 16 years old died in his arms while he was giving him a bath. Cosmos was like his son as Greg never married or had kids. This hurt him deeply and he started drinking Vodka and orange juice at his girlfriends house. He drank 1/2 gallon of Vodka a day, knowing that it would kill him, didn't care. He never came around me drinking as I would have given him a good talking to. Last time I saw Greg was on Mother's Day when he came over to bring me flowers. I noticed his stomach sticking out and ask him about it. He said he was eating good. yeah, right! Then on September 14, 2011, his girlfriend called me and told me Greg had gone to hospital with a stomach ache. My husband and I got dressed and went to the emergency room where he was laying in bed. They admitted him to hospital and said he would be there for a few days, liver trouble. The hospital dismissed him on the 17th and we took him back to his girlfriends home. We were never there when the doctor came so we didn't know at the time how bad he really was. On the 19th of September, he went back to hospital where he stayed until Sept. 29, 2011. We were there when the doctors came in and told us that Greg had End Stage of Liver Disease, with his history of drinking, he would not be eligible for a Liver Transplant. They had done all they could and advised us to call in hospice. We had him home for one week and decided to call hospice to see what they could do for him. My son talked to hospice, told them he had no insurance, no money, no job. They still said they could help him out, so he signed the papers.

Hospice called for a hospital bed with a mattress that rotated air to keep him from having bed sores, and a oxygen tank to help with his breathing, my son also has Asthma. Hospice also called in medicine for him to make him more comfortable. They have the most wonderful staff. Chaplain came, social worker came to see if she could apply for medicaid. We told her the hospital had applied when he was there last time. It is just so hard to see your son suffering and all you can do is give him pills. Greg has lost so much weight since the first of September, 2011. Last week, he slept 2 1/2 days because when he is feeling better, he wants to stay on the go, his nature. My husband takes him to visit his home, neighbors, see his girlfriend and he has not dranked anything stronger than tea or coffee. We keep close tabls on him as we are retired and stay home. Does anyone have suggestions to help him. He won't put his legs up above his heart like his nurse wants him to do and his legs are swollen hard as a rock and his feet. I am afraid his legs will split again like they did before, that was horrible, plus get infections on legs and feet.

Last edited by sonlove; 12-10-2011 at 10:46 AM. Reason: Greg's legs are now starting to leak yesterday, 12/09/11

 
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Old 12-06-2011, 09:43 AM   #2
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jennybyc HB Userjennybyc HB Userjennybyc HB Userjennybyc HB Userjennybyc HB Userjennybyc HB Userjennybyc HB Userjennybyc HB Userjennybyc HB Userjennybyc HB Userjennybyc HB User
Re: End Stage of Liver Disease

Isn't it amazing how it's always someone or something else that makes them drink? Someone ticked him off or his dog died...never that he choose to pick up a drink and consume it. I know....I watched my father drink himself to death too.

End stage liver failure is hard to watch so be prepared. The liver filters out the poisons in the blood that build up from everything we do...like eat and drink. That big belly he had was not from eating.....it was from malnutrition. You know those pictures you see of starving kids in Africa and they have the huge round bellies from malnutrition...same thing. Cirrhosis actually comes from the alcoholic not eating a decent diet and they get malnutrition. That makes the liver swell up as well and become fatty and then in end stage, it shrinks back and gets hard as rock. And it slowly stops working. So toxins build up and they can develop dementia...dad was a nuclear engineer who didn't know where the sun had gone when it got dark. Infections can lead to gangrene because the immune system no longer works...that is what killed my father. Or the liver just shuts down and they die very fast. Dad used to bleed a lot too so be prepared for that as well.

He'll have up days and down days and it can take a long time to finally end. If he develops dementia, you may want to move him to a hospice facility as it can be very hard with that...they don't listen and may wander off or hurt themselves.

I'm sorry you are having to watch your son die but he knew he was committing suicide one drop of alcohol at a time. All you can do now is make it as easy for him and yourselves as you can. But once a liver gets to a point of no return, meaning it can't regenerate anymore, there is nothing anyone can do. Towards the end, he probably won't even know who he is let alone that he is dying. The ones who will feel the most pain will be you.

Please take care of yourselves. He had many chances to stop and save his own life and he made the choice not to. It is incredibly sad. So you need to be very good to yourselves. And if his care gets to be too much, he can go into a nursing home or hospice care somewhere...Medicaid will pay....get the social worker to help you file for him if he won't. You don't have to care for him. And consider some therapy for yourselves to understand what alcohol does to someone and help you manage your own health and feelings as his time draws near. Al-Anon should be a MUST. They will support you too and they know what you are experiencing. Al-Anon is for family, not the alcoholic.

I buried my father with a clean conscience. I tried to help him repeatedly and failed. I held his hand as he lay dying. And I forgave him for being human and not being able to stop drinking. It is so sad but don't let it kill you as well. Help yourselves while helping him. You will survive this and need to be prepared for that time in your lives.

I'm so sorry you have to go through this.

Jenny

 
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Old 12-09-2011, 02:35 PM   #3
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Post Re: End Stage of Liver Disease

My son's legs and feet have now started bleeding or leaking. His stomach is swollen big, he is in hospice care and they won't let him go to hospital to get his stomach drained, last time was Sept. 29, 2011 at hospital, 5 liters came out,

He is in an angry stage now. He knows it is his fault for drinking and messing his life up. I told him that God was in control of his life and no one knows when they will die. He is in my home, hospital bed in living room where he knows what is going on. His so call friends haven't been around, don't want to see him like he is. His nurse was here on Wednesday from hospice and he was grouchy to her. When she touched his tummy around bellybutton, he hollered at her that it hurt for her to touch him. She took his vitals, 102 over 70 and listen to his heart and chest. When she finished with him, I walked her to the door and outside on our porch. She asked me, "Is he like that all the time?" I said yes, here lately he has been grouchy, uncomfortable, cold, can't get him warmed up. I have piled so many blankets and throws on his bed, it is heavy to lift back for him to get in. That is the only way he can warm up.

I went to Wal-mart's to buy him nylon jogging pants. He put them on last night and said they kept him warmer than therma underwear. At last, I made him happy for a short while. His younger brother came over to see him and spend night on sofa to talk and watch tv . My oldest son and his wife came over to see him also, trying to cheer him up. My oldest son didn't want to go on his trip to Alaska today because he was worried about him dying while he was gone. I told him to go and have fun with my great grandddaughter .

I just want to know how long this will go on. He was told in Sept. 2011 about his End Stage Liver Disease. Some say from 0 to 6 months. That would make it around his birthday 26th of March.

 
Old 12-09-2011, 05:01 PM   #4
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sonlove HB User
Angry Re: End Stage of Liver Disease

My son had Chrossis of Liver five years ago, got better after not drinking for 2 1/2 years. He said some one had ticked him off and he was offered a beer and took it. He started drinking heavier. Then his dog, Cosmos, 16 years old died in his arms while he was giving him a bath. Cosmos was like his son as Greg never married or had kids. This hurt him deeply and he started drinking Vodka and orange juice at his girlfriends house. He drank 1/2 gallon of Vodka a day, knowing that it would kill him, didn't care. He never came around me drinking as I would have given him a good talking to. Last time I saw Greg was on Mother's Day when he came over to bring me flowers. I noticed his stomach sticking out and ask him about it. He said he was eating good. yeah, right! Then on September 14, 2011, his girlfriend called me and told me Greg had gone to hospital with a stomach ache. My husband and I got dressed and went to the emergency room where he was laying in bed. They admitted him to hospital and said he would be there for a few days, liver trouble. The hospital dismissed him on the 17th and we took him back to his girlfriends home. We were never there when the doctor came so we didn't know at the time how bad he really was. On the 19th of September, he went back to hospital where he stayed until Sept. 29, 2011. We were there when the doctors came in and told us that Greg had End Stage of Liver Disease, with his history of drinking, he would not be eligible for a Liver Transplant. They had done all they could and advised us to call in hospice. We had him home for one week and decided to call hospice to see what they could do for him. My son talked to hospice, told them he had no insurance, no money, no job. They still said they could help him out, so he signed the papers.

Hospice called for a hospital bed with a mattress that rotated air to keep him from having bed sores, and a oxygen tank to help with his breathing, my son also has Asthma. Hospice also called in medicine for him to make him more comfortable. They have the most wonderful staff. Chaplain came, social worker came to see if she could apply for medicaid. We told her the hospital had applied when he was there last time. It is just so hard to see your son suffering and all you can do is give him pills. Greg has lost so much weight since the first of September, 2011. Last week, he slept 2 1/2 days because when he is feeling better, he wants to stay on the go, his nature. My husband takes him to visit his home, neighbors, see his girlfriend and he has not dranked anything stronger than tea or coffee. We keep close tabs on him as we are retired and stay home. Does anyone have suggestions to help him. He won't put his legs up above his heart like his nurse wants him to do and his legs are swollen hard as a rock and his feet. I am afraid his legs will split again like they did before, that was horrible, plus get infections on legs and feet. You would think he knew better than to drink like that. Drinking doesn't solve anything, Praying does.

Last edited by Administrator; 12-20-2011 at 10:41 PM.

 
Old 12-10-2011, 12:47 AM   #5
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amyd HB Useramyd HB Useramyd HB Useramyd HB Useramyd HB Useramyd HB User
Re: End Stage of Liver Disease

Quote:
I just want to know how long this will go on. He was told in Sept. 2011 about his End Stage Liver Disease. Some say from 0 to 6 months. That would make it around his birthday 26th of March.
Nobody knows for sure, however from your description, I would probably say not too much time at all. <someone I knew> was exactly like your son; same self imposed liver disease; close to the same age; same guilt feelings for having brought this upon himself. He knew he was dying. His family also knew, however when it did happen it tough for all of us that were/became close to him.

"Hospice will neither hasten nor prolong death" or something similar; therefore if you seek out medical intervention to keep the patient alive, i.e., being admitted to a hospital to postpone death, you will be dropped from their program. With hospice, the patient will receive all the necessary medications to control pain/anxiety; will be taken care of by a CNA two/three times a week; have spiritual guidance as well as companion volunteers visiting as often as possible, if desired.
I am sorry for your son and for your family. It is one of the most terrible things loved ones go through.

Last edited by Administrator; 12-20-2011 at 10:44 PM.

 
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