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Old 11-25-2012, 07:32 PM   #1
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My daddy died :(

My daddy died in his sleep a little over a week ago. He was only 55 and they said he had a heart attack. He had never had any thing like that before. How does one go to sleep at such a young age and not wake up.

I am devastated. I dont think I have the tools to deal with him being gone. I have always been daddys little girl and I miss him so much. All I want to do is cry. It was just so unexpected. I didnt get the chance to say goodbye and I am so angry at the world.

I am a Christian, so I know that he is in heaven and I will get to be with him again someday.. but I an angry at God. I know it doesnt do any good, but I am. Why did he take my daddy? Why? I am just so hurt, I feel like I cant function. I go to work and cry, I try to sleep and I cry.

We buried him on Monday and then Thanksgiving was Thursday and my birthday Friday. Its not the same, and I know it hasnt been long.. but I cant see past the grief. I turned 31 and I feel like Im being such a baby. I feel like I am so alone. Is this normal? Will it ever get easier?

 
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Old 11-26-2012, 10:01 PM   #2
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Re: My daddy died :(

I'm so sorry you've lost your daddy way too soon, much less at thanksgiving and your birthday. Everything you are feeling is normal, even being angry at God. Don't rush your grief, some days you will shift from anger to denial and everything in between. Try to think of special times with him and make yourself smile through those memories. Talk about him with some one you know or come back here if it helps. Some days you will not want to talk and that's okay too.
I lost mine when I was 27 in 1999, he was sick so I had time to say good bye...but my mom died suddenly from a heart attack 3 years before in 1996 and my 48 year old sister passed in August 2011 from a heart attack too. I didn't get to tell them good bye either and for me their sudden death's have been harder to deal with. The what if's, could have's, and should have's are the worst. I do know that in time the pain won't stab so deep and the happy memories will come more often. Hope tomorrow takes it a little easier on you!

 
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Old 11-27-2012, 12:57 AM   #3
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Re: My daddy died :(

As crazy as this may sound, I can relate to you in so many ways. My dad died August 18 and I too am a daddy's girl. He was my everything, as I was his. He died in his sleep from a heart attack as well, the days before seemed as nothing was wrong. My heart aches everyday, wishing I could I just have one more day with him. At least to say goodbye, hug him, tell him I love him so much and thanks for being the best dad ever. Although we think it will never get better, we have to keep reminding our selfs it will. The more i think about, would having that one last day be good enough? Probably not. I watched my grandmother die from cancer last December , knowing she wouldn't be here much longer, even held her hand as she took her last breath, and still that wasn't enough. I know my dad wouldn't want me to be sad and dwell on the what ifs. And I'm sure yours wouldn't either. I am 24, he was only 54. What kills me the most is when I was little and my grandpa was a live, he was my everything. I was the apple of his eye just as I was my dads. Knowing my kids will never get to experience him as a granddad brings tears to my eyes every time I think about it. His birthday was September 4th not even a month after he died, not being able to call him was so tough, I cried all day. My birthday is this Friday, and I can already tell it's gong to be even harder, once again not to be able to hear his voice. I have found writing on his Facebook wall is comforting as if he is still on the other side reading it. Even though things this like that sound crazy, do what makes you happy and comforts you from the pain. I don't know how I am suppose to live my life without my dad. I have to keep reminding my self, although we don't know why at the moment, everything happens for a reason. I am sorry you have to go through loosing a parent. I don't wish it on anyone. I have also found that no one truly understands the heartache after loosing a parent. Especially at our young ages. It is normal to be angry, I was very angry. At everything. Why did MY dad have to go? All the questions you ask but don't have an answer for. It will get worse before it gets better. But it will get better. I even felt heartless in away for going back to work so soon but that's what I needed. Get back to some sense of "normal" and yes I cried all through out the day most days but that's ok. That's normal. My dad was cremated and I have a charm filled of his ashes that I wear on a bracelet everyday. When I feel sad I look at my bracelet and think of something he would say or a memory that makes me smile. I hope my story and feelings help you in some way and find peace and comfort in your heart. For me it still seems unreal at times. Confine in family, surround your self with love. At first I didn't want to be around anyone. But quickly learned I needed family more than anything. I my self had ups and downs with my step sister and step mom but have put our problems aside and lean on each other and it's helped a lot. Just take one day at a time and remember its ok to cry, laugh, even be mad or some days not say a word.

 
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Old 11-27-2012, 03:14 PM   #4
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Re: My daddy died :(

Thats exactly how I feel.. why MY daddy? And you are right, forever wouldnt be long enough, but 55 is way too soon. I just cant seem to wrap my brain around it. It hurts so much. Thanks for the kind replies. I really appreciate it. And Im sorry for your losses as well.

 
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Old 11-30-2012, 10:26 AM   #5
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Re: My daddy died :(

Im just so sad. Hes been gone for 2 weeks now and it hurts so much. I miss him every minute of every day. Why MY daddy? He had just turned 55 on 9/5. Way too young. He didnt get to see me get married, no grand babies. I should have started sooner. I just havent found the one and kept putting it off. Just one more thing to hurt over. I go from wanting to scream to crying.

 
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Old 11-30-2012, 12:24 PM   #6
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Re: My daddy died :(

I'm so sorry for your loss of your dad.....don't blame yourself for not having kids sooner so he could see them....that's the guilt part of the grieving process. everything you're feeling is normal for someone who is grieving. I lost my dad in 2000, when I was 41 and he was 72, after a very long battle with parkinsons disease. One thing you can take comfort in is that your dad didn't suffer. I'm sorry again.

 
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Old 12-15-2012, 05:21 PM   #7
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Re: My daddy died :(

It was a month yesterday since daddy died and it still hurts like it was yesterday. I cant believe its been a month since I talked to him. Its so fresh, I still cry everyday.. and the closer Christmas comes the worse it seems. He loved the holidays so much. I cant believe he isnt here to share them with anymore.

 
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Old 01-17-2013, 03:52 AM   #8
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Re: My daddy died :(

I'm sorry for your loss! but time will heal your wounds i know you miss your daddy but you have to learn to let it go

 
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Old 01-17-2013, 01:34 PM   #9
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Re: My daddy died :(

Hugs...to everyone here who has lost their dad. =(

 
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Old 03-17-2013, 07:12 AM   #10
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Re: My daddy died :(

Hey I just wanted to say I know exactly how you feel. I lost my Dad is December and I still feel awful. I'm 28 and its hurts that my Dad will miss so much. I didn't get married yet or have kids either. I just don't think its fair my Dad will never get to experience those things with me. It hurts so bad. My Dad helped my Mom raise my Nephew because my sister was not able and my Dad did so much for him. It wasn't even my Dads real blood because it was my half sister my moms daughter from a previous marriage. But my Dad didn't care he loved that kid like it was his own. I feel my Dad will never get the credit he deserved because my nephew was 11 when he died and I don't think he know how much he did for him. I wake up in the middle of the night thinking how my Dad will be forgotten. I feel like I'm the only one still hurting. I just never knew a pain like this and I feel like I have to act like I'm doing ok and do normal things but I'm dying inside. My Mom I know she misses my Dad but I feel like its just this is part of life and we have to move on. How do you move on from the worse thing in life?

 
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Old 04-05-2013, 04:04 PM   #11
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Re: My daddy died :(

Always remember that life is Eternal. Your Daddy is with God at the next level what ever that may be.

I think life is like getting off a train, years ago, and at our departure time, we get back on it for the next station in the Eternal life system.

I hope this helps.

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Originally Posted by rajeenah View Post
Hey I just wanted to say I know exactly how you feel. I lost my Dad is December and I still feel awful. I'm 28 and its hurts that my Dad will miss so much. I didn't get married yet or have kids either. I just don't think its fair my Dad will never get to experience those things with me. It hurts so bad. My Dad helped my Mom raise my Nephew because my sister was not able and my Dad did so much for him. It wasn't even my Dads real blood because it was my half sister my moms daughter from a previous marriage. But my Dad didn't care he loved that kid like it was his own. I feel my Dad will never get the credit he deserved because my nephew was 11 when he died and I don't think he know how much he did for him. I wake up in the middle of the night thinking how my Dad will be forgotten. I feel like I'm the only one still hurting. I just never knew a pain like this and I feel like I have to act like I'm doing ok and do normal things but I'm dying inside. My Mom I know she misses my Dad but I feel like its just this is part of life and we have to move on. How do you move on from the worse thing in life?

 
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Old 10-06-2013, 07:15 PM   #12
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Re: My daddy died :(

I am so very sorry to hear about your father. You must be learning a great deal from doctors and maybe online about what caused that to happen. I also lost my father to heart disease on February 1, 2012. He was young too, only 60 years old. He was playing racquetball and collapsed. He died of cardiac arrest versus a heart attack. It is all stemming from the same problem, heart disease. The trauma of losing someone so suddenly I've learned, is experienced somewhat differently than losing someone over a long-battled illness. I suffered from PTSD for a short period of time and still battle with depression. It will never be the same for you, as it isn't for me. I applaud you though in that you are trying to seek help for yourself so quickly. I attended a grief support group that was free to my community via a local hospice program (even without my loved one having been a patient there). I also see a therapist bi-weekly. I was comforted in hearing similar stories about those who have lost family members in the support group. I would urge you to seek out those who will listen objectively to you, whether in a support group or otherwise. Grief is an incredibly isolating thing to go through and joining a local group may really help. Again, I am so sorry to hear of your loss. God bless you and remember that the love that you have for your father and the love he has for you has not ended. Love never ends in death.

Quote:
Originally Posted by ninny1123 View Post
My daddy died in his sleep a little over a week ago. He was only 55 and they said he had a heart attack. He had never had any thing like that before. How does one go to sleep at such a young age and not wake up.

I am devastated. I dont think I have the tools to deal with him being gone. I have always been daddys little girl and I miss him so much. All I want to do is cry. It was just so unexpected. I didnt get the chance to say goodbye and I am so angry at the world.

I am a Christian, so I know that he is in heaven and I will get to be with him again someday.. but I an angry at God. I know it doesnt do any good, but I am. Why did he take my daddy? Why? I am just so hurt, I feel like I cant function. I go to work and cry, I try to sleep and I cry.

We buried him on Monday and then Thanksgiving was Thursday and my birthday Friday. Its not the same, and I know it hasnt been long.. but I cant see past the grief. I turned 31 and I feel like Im being such a baby. I feel like I am so alone. Is this normal? Will it ever get easier?

 
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