Hi Charlene:
First of all, I'm not a dentist. Not even close. But I am deathly afraid of dentists (even thought I currently work for a dental insurance company...go figure!)
Secondly, You're only 30. If you are in relatively good health otherwise, then you may have a little to be concerned about, but nothing that a dentist can't help you with.
Third, If you are that worried about the dentist treating you differently because this is your first time, most dentists I speak to (and I talk to them nearly every day in the course of my work) will be so happy that you are taking that first step, they will only try to give you a real idea of the shape your mouth is in, and as many options as they can think of. Just like most things in regular medicine, a dental fix won't work unless you work with it.
Here's a suggestion: I've moved around quite a bit. When I move to a new place, I usually get around to making a dental appointment after the first year, year-and-a-half, and I always end up calling the receptionist back at least once and asking if the dentist I've chosen is good with paranoid patients (my words, not a diagnosis for you!! LOL)I have to wonder if your dad didn't cancel that first appointment when he was 30, and that's why he had problems.
Also, understand that women's bodies metabolise calcium and other minerals useful to teeth differently. If you've had several pregnancies, then the sooner you get in, the better. If not, then you should still go in, but your body has probably made a little bit better use of the calcium in your diet. Men are better with other minerals (usually the ones we really need!!!!). Even though you are your father's child, you still have your mother's genes. How are her teeth? If they are good, then don't worry so much. If they are not so good, then ask her how old she was the first time she went.
Finally, maybe take a friend..someone you have to look brave in front of. The dentist is mostly fear of the unknown. My biggest issue (and I didn't know this until AFTER I started working for the dental company) was that dentists were doctors who did medical things to you with no anesthesia. Kind of like giving birth with a vet in attendance. I now know different, and strongly urge you to keep a stiff upper lip (pun intended!! LOL) and keep your appointment. If you have to be scared, then go ahead. But tell the dentist and the hygienist that you are. Contrary to popular belief, dentisits don't like causing pain as a rule!
Good luck
Dawn