First off, I am (about to be) 28 and feel the same way as you about my teeth. My husband also has only a couple of fillings, and spends half as much time cleaning his teeth.
I am just going through my first (problematic) RCT on a first molar. Another first molar will need one soon. I will probably choose gold onlays instead of crowns (especially porcelain over metal): They take away less tooth structure, prevent the tooth from cracking, since all cusps are covered, and should last longer than porcelain-over-metal crowns, where the porcelain can crack off. Also, if the onlays ever need to be redone, more tooth is left to be prepared for new coverage. Of course, gold is less beautiful, but since you are married
My husband won't mind if a little gold shines through.
If it's any comfort, my teeth are not much better than yours, and I still am a few years younger. Most of my molars have amalgam fillings (that need to be replaced soon; can't wait for more RCT).