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Old 03-27-2004, 06:49 AM   #1
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genie04 HB User
Unhappy please, can anyone help? Feeling so desperate.

Hi, I'm quite new here but im feeling so desperate now, I would be so greatful if anyone could please give me some advice. Im not quite sure how to write all this down so please try to bear with me.

About October of last year I started having panic attacks and severe anxiety.It felt like it just came out of nowhere but the feelings were unbearable. After seeing lots of doctors advising me different things, I was told to go on Efexor XR. I started off on 75mg and was on that for about 1 1/2 months but i didnt feel any different, so I was told to increase my dose to 150mg.

After I had done this, the panic attacks stopped but I still felt anxious all the time. I told the doctor this but he told me to stick with the efexor XR. I have now been on them for 4 months and I still dont feel myself at all.

BUT, and this is the part im really asking for advice on...

Apart from feeling anxious still I also feel totally numb inside and I'm finding it so hard to cope. Its hard to describe but I feel like all the life has been sucked out of me. I feel permanently tired like I have no energy. Getting out of bed in the morning is a nightmare and I often lie in until midday as I just cant face getting up and having another day like this.

I used to be so full of energy. I loved going out and I was the life and soul of the party. Now I have no enthusiasm about anything. I dont get excited over ANYTHING anymore. I used to feel so alive and all the wonderful feelings I used to have just dont exist anymore. The part that is the hardest for me to deal with is that I have a boyfriend who I was SO in love with. The feelings I had for him were like nothing I had ever experienced before, but now I feel so numb inside I cant feel those feelings of love and I find this so DISTRESSING. I havent told him this as it would be so damaging and I know I do love him as there is NO one else I would rather be with but I just can FEEL the feelings of being in love anymore. I am so scared that they wont come back.

I dont even know if I am depressed because I can feel anything so as silly as it sounds, I cant tell. Is this what depression can feel like?

I dont know if it is the Efexor that is causing this and whether I need to come off it. Ive never been on ADs before and I'm scared that a) I'll come off it and feel the same or b) i'll come of it and the panic attacks and anxiety will come back. It was so scary I dont want to have to go through that again.

This is the first time I have been on ADs so im new to what to expect from them. The last 2 times I went to the doctor I told him I still didnt feel myself but he kept telling me to stick with them, but I honestly feel they're not helping me. I am also going to counsilling and although talking about my problems helps a bit i dont think it is going to make this go away. I'm just totally at the end of my tether now and I'm beginning to question what is the point in living if I dont feel anything.

I would do ANYTHING to have my feelings back and to be able to feel alive and actually enjoy life again. I dont really know what anyone can say to this but I'm just so desperate at the moment that any replies will be really greatly appreciated.

Thanks x

 
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Old 03-27-2004, 07:34 AM   #2
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kbell HB User
Re: please, can anyone help? Feeling so desperate.

I can definitely relate with what you're going through. Medicine can be so helpful but it can leave you feeling like a blank slate: where you used to have a whole variety of different emotions, you feel almost like you have none or that you're just indifferent towards everything. I don't know if it is the medicine that is meant to help that causes this or what. If you don't feel right, it kind of bothers me that you're doc who prescribed you the meds isn't taking into account the fact that you're feeling this way and the meds may be the cause behind it. I'm not a medical professional so I don't really know. You know you love your boyfriend and he must know you love him. I would say just to talk to him and try to tell him a little bit about what you're going through. That might help. Don't give up.

 
Old 03-27-2004, 08:15 AM   #3
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EVERYDAY SUNDAY HB User
Re: please, can anyone help? Feeling so desperate.

time is a great healer. when i had my second bout of major depression, i had panic attacks where my heart was beating like crazy and I felt so much anxiety especially in the morning. after several months, it went away by itself

 
Old 03-27-2004, 10:57 AM   #4
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WorriedUser HB User
Re: please, can anyone help? Feeling so desperate.

i completely understand what you are going through. activities like yoga could definately help. i took a class and it was nice, it gives you time to completely clear your mind and relax, so you can face the world with strength. hope that helps

Last edited by WorriedUser; 03-27-2004 at 02:48 PM.

 
Old 03-27-2004, 02:09 PM   #5
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Anybody HB User
Re: please, can anyone help? Feeling so desperate.

My feeling is that doctors are too quick to prescribe these anti-depressants.

Mal nutirition can cause anxiety and panic attacks.
Allergies can cause anxiety and panic attacks.

You need a complete work up. I would guess that would be expensive, but this is your life.
Fundamental NEUROBIOCHEMICAL DEFICIENCIES. Organic acids, amino acids, mineral levels, vitamin levels (i.e. folic acid deficiencies common) and metabolite requirements are most often found deficient in patients with depression/anxiety.

These anti depressant medications cannot make up for these deficiencies.

If you cannot afford the work up, Please, for your own sake, study nutirition.
What kind of foods are you now eating? You could start by getting a good multi vitamin-mineral supplement. This won't be cheap either. The one-a-day variety just won't be sufficient. You need something that suggests you use 6 to 9 of tablets a day, 9 to 14 of capsules. Capsules are easier to swallow. Some of those tablets are really big. That's for starters to give you some immediate help.

Next, you need to be aware of the junk you might be eating. Stuff like, candy, cakes, cookies, pies and other sweet stuff are not nutrition. Soft drinks are to be avoided also. They are really poisonous chemical concoctions. Also avoid anything made with white flour. If you eat bread, get whole wheat bread. If you don't like the taste of it, at least get one of the darker wheat mixes. Get bakery bread if possible. Better still, make your own.

 
Old 03-27-2004, 10:41 PM   #6
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lori j HB User
Re: please, can anyone help? Feeling so desperate.

I've been on anti-d's for 7 years maybe a bit longer. The first one I was on worked for those 7 years, did not make me unfeeling or anything like that, it took away all my negative thoughts that I had dwelled on most of my life, it leveled me out to feel good & normal again. Last Oct. it quit working & I've been thru 4 meds now, none of which have worked for one reason or another. This 5th one is making me feel "high" like I'm floating, I know what you mean about not feeling anything. That is what most of these are doing to me. None are working like my very first one did, too bad it quit working. So, I would say that the effexor is not the right med for you, an anti-d or anti-anxiety med that is working properly should not make you feel numb or nothing. I am beginning to think my pdoc is an idiot. I think there are a lot of pdocs out there that just don't seem to hear what we are saying. Find a new one that is willing to listen & truly care how you are feeling.

 
Old 03-27-2004, 11:42 PM   #7
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Re: please, can anyone help? Feeling so desperate.

HI Genie, I wondered what type of work you do. You mention you lay in bed till mid day. I must admit that when I go to work, I get up earlier, and though I feel alittle tired on my AD, I do feel so much more energized once I am involved in work. I work with kids. They are so loving and need attention. It gets all the focus off me...and my medication.
Do you work or go to school?
Now on the weekend, I tend to sleep in. Or if I have a school vacation.
It is about taking ourselves, on meds., and getting out into the world, and see if they help us cope better. Or in my case, and yours...have less anxiety.
Now in your case, the Effexor may not be the med for you.
I am on Celexa. Perhaps you could ask you p.doc about this one....
good luck, and do get a p.doc that you have a good relationship with, and is reputable.
This is my advice. I hope alittle helps....
answer back, I hope with anymore questions or concerns, here to listen,
dagmar



[QUOTE=genie04]
BUT, and this is the part im really asking for advice on...

Apart from feeling anxious still I also feel totally numb inside and I'm finding it so hard to cope. Its hard to describe but I feel like all the life has been sucked out of me. I feel permanently tired like I have no energy. Getting out of bed in the morning is a nightmare and I often lie in until midday as I just cant face getting up and having another day like this.

I used to be so full of energy.

Last edited by dagmarharris; 03-27-2004 at 11:42 PM.

 
Old 03-29-2004, 09:03 AM   #8
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Anybody HB User
Re: please, can anyone help? Feeling so desperate.

Is anyone paying attention to what I am telling you about food and vitamins?

Your body is made of the food you eat, the water you drink, and the air you breath.
It can be negativly impacted by various chemicals that have been added.

If your body is chemically unbalanced your mind will be too. As you have noticed, when you are physically ill, your mind just doesn't work well.

Please do yourself a favor and start off with those good vitamins.

Maybe you'e not ready. Some folks enjoy their miseries.

Maybe there is some undisclosed "pay off" to having this condition.
Sympathy, attention, self punishment, an excuse to delay some dreaded task.

 
Old 03-29-2004, 11:45 PM   #9
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MonNiteFootball HB User
Re: please, can anyone help? Feeling so desperate.

Genie,
It sounds like your medication is numbing your feelings. Do NOT stop it cold turkey though. You need to talk to your doctor about weaning off of it very slowly. "Anybody" gave you some great advice. Anxiety and depression is often always caused by nutritional deficiencies, particularly Magnesium(#1) and B-complex. You need to start off with high doses in the beginning to bring your body back into some kind of balance.
I hope you feel better soon,
Football Fan

 
Old 03-31-2004, 06:29 PM   #10
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possum HB User
Re: please, can anyone help? Feeling so desperate.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Anybody
Please do yourself a favor and start off with those good vitamins.

Maybe you'e not ready. Some folks enjoy their miseries.
I went on the anti-stress high potency vitamin thing over 20 years ago.

It didn't work!

IN MY OPINION, vitamins and the whole health industry is a scam. Products you can obtain cheaply (or even grow yourself) are rediculously marked up.

I do have multi-vitamins tablets in the house, and took one occasionally when I knew my diet was inadequate. Since my wife left however, I am in control of what I eat and now I concetrate on healthier foods.

Everyday I MUST have at least half a glass of nutritional vegetable juice AND (not at the same time) FRESH fruit with half a glass of fruit juice. The other things I eat fill in the nutritional "void".

I think the nutrition industry lost the plot decades ago. Why? Have a very close look at what they recommend to people 1.) Trying to lose weight 2.) Trying to gain weight. You'll notice the only difference is the amount of calories.

I personally think the well balanced diet is a crock of **** (insert vulgar slang term meaning faeces). If we needed a well balanced diet EVERY DAY, then why does our body store SOME vitamins and not others?

I believe the "balanced diet" should be planned over a week, rather than daily, varying not just vitamin and miniral intake, but calorie and fat intake aswell. Also, since the dawn of time, (till recently) people have eaten seasonally. Changing your diet from summer to winter may seem strange (because we don't have to NOW) but it was perfectly natural till the invention of the electric refrigerator.

Then there are cultural differences. People whos' ancestors NEVER had flour in their diet should seriously reconsider the amount of processed white bread in their diet for example.
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Old 03-31-2004, 10:15 PM   #11
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possum HB User
Re: please, can anyone help? Feeling so desperate.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Anybody
You could start by getting a good multi vitamin-mineral supplement. This won't be cheap either. The one-a-day variety just won't be sufficient. You need something that suggests you use 6 to 9 of tablets a day, 9 to 14 of capsules.
It just occured to me from I bit of trivia I learnt as a child (don't eat bears liver).

DO NOT take 6 to 9 of tablets a day, 9 to 14 of capsules in a day!

Vitamin A in high doses is TOXIC. You will die or damage your liver at the very least.

Always consult a GP before going on any irregular supplement program.
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Old 04-01-2004, 11:37 PM   #12
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artichack HB User
Re: please, can anyone help? Feeling so desperate.

I too can relate to your feelings. Depression has the tell tale signs of having no feelings what so ever...except for feeling miserable, guilty, anxious, tired all of the time along with having insomnia.... I'm not a doctor, but I have suffered from major depression, my second bout beginning in sept,o3, and I'm still not quite 100 percent...my suggestion to you would first find out if maybe somethings wrong physically...get a full physical to rule out anyother causes...get blood work done, this also can eliminate other causes. If you are diagnosed with depression...know that it's not the end of the world...depression does go away...the earlier you catch it, and treat it. the faster you will be back feeling like your old self. If your medication is not working...try something else...tell your doctor...you have to take care of yourself.....ask questions...find out as much as you can about depression..anxiety...as they mirror each other....and can go hand in hand. Don't give up, wev'e all been where you are...so deep down it's hard to see up and out of the hole....but with time, you will get back feelings of love, and happiness...best of luck....hang in there!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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