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Depression Message Board
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Old 10-01-2005, 01:09 PM   #1
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Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Boston, MA
Posts: 1
AlwaysBlue HB User
Exclamation Desperation

Hi, I'm new here. I'm am 22 years old, almost 23. I was diagnosed with depression while in college, and was seeing a therapist. I have since not seen one because of my hectic life, and my transition out of college. I come from a verbally and emotionally abusive household, and am finally having to come to terms with how it has effected me as a person. I recently moved in with my boyfriend. As my condition continues to worsen, he likes to remind me that I need help, but now is threatening to break up with me because he "can't handle it." I need him to help me through this right now, not run out on me and leave me by myself to deal with it alone. How do I explain to him that loving someone in this situation means standing by them and making sure they make it out in one piece?

I am getting a doctor as of monday, because I can't put it off anymore. But what do I do!!!!!!

 
Old 10-01-2005, 02:07 PM   #2
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Join Date: Jun 2005
Posts: 110
Ellenc HB User
Re: Desperation

Hello AlwaysBlue......
I think your going in the right direction to post on the depression link and your appointment with a Dr. I have been diagnosed with major depression and have taken meds for many years. The meds have helped me live my life without depression and despair every day. Meds are not used and not wanted by everyone. I respect that.
I suggest keeping a very open mind with the Dr's suggestions and then decide what you think is best for you.
I am sorry you were raised in an abusive household. So much damage can be done to us mentally and emotionally. Today there are so many ways we can be helped.
In my own experience, people we are close to are just scarred for us. Depression is frightening to both of us. I know I fear the "unknown". The love from others does not deminish because they do care just as much as ever. I have treaded softly around many family members. I have had support from them but not what I thought I should have received at the beginning. I did stop and take a look at myself including my emotions and actions. By taking a deep breath, I was able to sort my feelings and emotions before acting on them. Little things help me.
The good news is you have support on this post and many ways you can be helped.
I wish you good information at your Dr. appointment. Take care...Ellen

 
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Old 10-01-2005, 02:48 PM   #3
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Join Date: Dec 2004
Posts: 754
here4support HB User
Lightbulb Re: Desperation

Hello Alwaysblue!

I feel your pain. I'm suffering from some depression, and also have a call in to my therapist, who hasn't called me back. It is so frustrating.

I to want my husband to understand, but he doesn't. I too come from an emotionally abusive household. It isn't easy. I can totally understand where you are coming from. I fear my husband will leave me because he doesn't know how to deal with my depression moments.

A screen user here by the name of MildDepJeff I believe gave me a helpful piece of info. He told me to tell my husband that when he sees me crying, to just hug me, or hold me, that way he will know what to do. Sometimes we have to tell them what to do, or else they feel as helpless as we do, and they want to turn the other way. It is unfortunate but true.

I hope that you can come back and talk to us here......it is nice to meet you.

 
Old 10-01-2005, 03:12 PM   #4
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Join Date: Jul 2005
Posts: 173
Jecca1 HB User
Re: Desperation

If you find out what type depression you have, you could get a book about it and both of you read it together. He needs to be able to understand what you're going through so he will know how to help. If he loves you and wants you two to make it, this is something you need to work at together. He doesn't need to be on the outside.

Best of Luck,

Jecca1

 
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