Originally Posted by britendarkk
I thought I was doing better because my bad thoughts didn't seem to have as much of an emotional impact on me. But sunday I went into a downward spiral and ended up cutting. I can't ever seem to get ahead, and frankly the times when I do feel good, I can't trust it or enjoy it because I know it's not going to last. And it never does. I feel like life is done with me.
I know how you feel. I was doing great until yesterday and everything just caved in at once. I've never cut, but my thing was always drugs and alcohol to the point of near death. I would drink till the point where I should probably be dead.
I woke up this morning saying to myself how exhausted I am and how I'm just ready to throw in the towel.
It's so unfair that people like you and I have to put up this exhausting constant fight every single day while there's people out there who seemingly live full happy lives. I'm so sick of watching people that smile all day long, and have great friends that pick them back up when they fall....
Depression is a lonely disorder. It seems no one understands. I'm as exhausted as you are. I tell myself everyday that I just don't know how much longer I can hang on. It really pisses me off that we have to go through this. It's not fair. I can't live my life.
Hope things get better for you.