i hate this world - Depression Message Board

ChangingMyLife · 09-14-2002, 07:55 PM

i hate everyone. nobody likes me.
everyone at my school has plans tonight except me, this world stinks.

ffsmith · 09-14-2002, 08:19 PM

Yeah weekends are the worst you are right.

You are lucky though you have Star Trek, The Next Generation, Deep Space 9, and Voyager. I just had the first two. Pretty sad huh.

I used to do homework all weekend.

Or drive home and waist my life donating my time for a very ungrateful father.
I guess you could call that charity work?

How is the campus?

I use to just walk around sometimes and explore all the labs and buildings. And of course the library. I spent a lot of time there. I would read paperback books to, ‘The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy’ that is a pretty funny series, and of course ‘Catcher In The Rye’ you got to read that in College. How about romance novels are you into those; they can be a distracting.

I love to escape into a fantasy world because as you say this world stinks.
Are you into video games or music? I was not.

If I get tired of ‘fantasy’ friends I usually just sleep.

The more I think about it I want to go back to college at least the cops did not beat me up there. They were reasonable

Well good luck friend

[This message has been edited by ffsmith (edited 09-14-2002).]

ChangingMyLife · 09-14-2002, 08:36 PM

i hate being in college, i mean i like it but its horrible to be all alone. I talk to everyone, but i can make any friends. i dont know what to do.

ffsmith · 09-15-2002, 01:08 PM

You definitely have a good idea of what you want. Namely friends.
And it sounds like you are trying very hard and for quite a while.
And it sounds like you are very frustrated.

I can relate to all that. And I feel bad for you.

I do not know what the answer is, but I do know that hating the world is not going to help.

I know that walking around thinking I am ugly does not help me one bit.

The world is never going to be the way I want it, that makes me sad but it is out of my control.

Being alone can be very horrible, but it can be ok and fun to. For me I am so tense around people that being alone is at least a relief. You can do some things that are fun alone, use you imagination.

But if I dwell on how alone I am things can seem sad an hopeless like they probably do for you. So I try and distract myself.

I know you have tried therapy, but I would keep trying it. And up the dose on the Zoloft

MargyP · 09-15-2002, 02:27 PM

Hiya!
I was really worried about you as I read some of your older posts.
(For the others here that know me I'm sorry I haven't been around but since coming back from my little holiday I got really down again, partly 'cos of having to come back to my "normal" life and partly because of the holiday itself, and I felt a bit daft posting again 'cos I was Mrs Positive and I didn't feel that way anymore and I was sure you were all getting sick of my positive attitude)
Anyway Sue, Nice to meet you! I did send a message to your icq number but you probably didn't get it.
I want you to know that I feel the same way you do and I even said to my cousellor that if I was good looking my life wouldn't be this bad because I would have had more chances and met someone and got married years ago etc..etc...instead of living in the craphole I do now!
If I'd have liked myself more I would have set my standards higher and not settled for whoever came along and wanted me! But I never thought I was worth it!
I don't really know what I'm trying to tell you here maybe that I do know how you feel, I have one real life friend so I know what you mean when you say you have no friends. I know you want real life friends but believe me the people here on this board are real life friends we may not go to the movies or out for a drink together but they are friends all the same. (Thats why I feel so bad for just dissapearing on them when things went downhill for me again ( I'm Sorry Guys

)

I was worried about you I even posted a message asking about you!
Take care xxxx

Margy

I bet I'm the ugliest!! :-P

[ ~~ MargyP, it is not permissable to post personal contact detail. ~~ Thanks, Minerva ]

[This message has been edited by minerva (edited 09-16-2002).]