slurpygood1

I know you said you need your job, and I'm sorry to possibly offer a suggestion that you cannot use, but I understand how you feel and I'm speaking from my own experience. I recently lost my job. But I'm not upset. I had this job for over two years and I HATED it. I mean, I could barely drag myself out of bed in the morning sometimes. I have other issues in my life, but this job brought me down so much that it was causing me an extreme amount of mental anguish to the point where I would cry every day and call in sick and honestly, I stopped caring about it. And gradually, I stopped caring about everything in my life. Because when you work 40 hours a week someplace you hate, that's a lot of time and it can overshadow a lot of other things in your life that might otherwise be good. I suffer with depression as it is and I tried to kill myself because I thought I'd rather be dead than go to work anymore. Well, I'll stop rambling about myself. I know I was kind of an extreme case. My point, finally, is that it's NOT WORTH IT. I understand you can't just up and quit. I live on my own and have rent and bills and whatever as well. But if you are so miserable, you should TRY and find a way to take a leave, or, as someone said, go on disability. Whatever. You will feel so much better. Maybe you will find a new position if you have some time off to clear your mind. It will make a world of difference.