very persistent thoughts
I was on here a week or so ago and wanted to say thanks for the support. Things are changing again, recently I've been having dreams about dying. I don't usually dream and if I do I don't remember them. Last night I woke up when I shot myself in a dream. Practically when I look at my life I know it could be a lot worse than it is, but recently the sense of futility has been over riding and this time its not going away. My life plods along, like an endless stream of grey. I'm fed, I have a place to live and decent friends. This doesn't stop me from seeing the whole picture and there is nothing but a feeling of pointlessness.
I know some people here will feel the same or similar and I wondered if it ever goes away or if you have a way to break it as a cycle. Because when I say pointless, I mean absolutely everything. Why should I stay married, why should I see friends, why should I build my business....and it goes on. I feel empty and bored by myself.
So I will sign off now and say thanks in advance