Hi. I know that this is such a broad question, and that I'll probably get a lot of responses telling me to go do research. I have, I've read through all the symptoms, the online tests, and I'm still not sure.
I guess the question is, where do you draw the line between depression and just being in a bad mood, or having a bad day. I'm 18, I really don't know if I should be getting help or not. Sometimes I think that I'm depressed, then I think that I'm just making it up, trying to create something where there's nothing.
There are times when I just feel empty. Not really upset, not even necessarily sad, just completely empty. I'll look around my room and try to find something to do, and nothing appeals to me, not reading, writing, getting on my computer. I'll come home form hanging out with friends, something that should make me feel good, and just be sad, even if I had a great time. Then again, that could just be nagging doubt about my relationship with my friends, everyone gets that. Some things that I used to enjoy don't appeal to me as much anymore. Sometimes I'll want to do them, but often I couldn't even imagine getting up and doing that same thing over again. The only thing that makes me feel truly happy is being at the barn, with my horse and all the people there.
Sometimes, even a lot of the time, I feel happy, I have a good time. Its like as long as I'm actively having a good time, as long as I'm at the barn, as long as I'm with my friends or family, I'm happy. But that feeling doesn't carry over. And when I'm alone I'm miserable.
But then I sit and think, why should I be depressed? What right do I have to complain about anything? I have a great family that loves me, close friends, I have my horse that makes everything worth it, I'm going to a good school next year, and I've had a good childhood. So how am I depressed? Why should I be?
Wow, that was long, and thanks to anyone who read it. I guess the question is, have any of you experienced these things...and did it turn out to be depression? Or am I just exagerating the feelings that everyone gets?
Hi horsegal. Maybe you're going through some sort of identity struggle, like you're becoming a young adult and don't quite know what to do with yourself. It sounds like you'll be graduating from high school soon, if you hadn't already. Have you thought of any careers you might want to pursue? Do you exercise? Keeping active helps a whole lot.
You're right, I just graduated from high school on last weekend, then leaving for college next fall, which I am exited about. I'd like to pursue a career in journalism, study political science in college too. I work out kind of sparadically, I got busy around graduation time and didn't go running as much as I'd like. I do get regular exercise riding my horse almost every day.
I've had a friend say I've been acting differently, and suggested that it was nervousness about college, or the stress of leaving high school. But it doesn't seem like it. I'm nothing but exited about college...I think.
You say you're sad when you're alone. Can you have issues about abandonment or fear of being alone? Are you worried that something bad might happen when you're alone? Do you look to others to make you happy rather than being content with yourself?
It's wierd, I don't think that I have issues with fear of abandonment or anything like that. It just seems like, without people there, I just feel empty. Like, I need someone there to make me feel happy, or even just content.
The difference between sadness and depression is time. Sadness comes and goes in spurts where as depression just seems to last forever. I agree with the above posters it sounds like your at a crossroad in your life and trying to figure out which direction to take. A high school graduation is a big deal and it tends to make one reflect on all aspects of their life.
Major Depressive Disorder With Psychotic Features
Post Traumatic Stress Disorder
Borderline Personality Disorder
Generalized Anxiety Disorder