Recently I have been having a lot of trouble with myself. I accomplished in the last few years many goals that i set out for. After accomplishing one goal instead of feeling better i ussually ended up feeling worse? I am on meds and it usually kept me sane let me live a normal life for the past years. But now things are starting to get really bad its like NOTHING interests me. I use to be so social and had all these friends now when im not working I just hide out in my apt away from everyone. I dont return phone calls either.
I am so tired of being tired all the time im 26 i want the energy that everyone else has! im in decent shape also and eat great take my vitamins yet my 60 year old mother (who use to have cancer) and my father BOTH have more energy then me! Isnt that sad? I just dont get whats wrong with me...
I gained a bit of weight after having cosmetic surgery done (had my hairline moved down) I wonder if thats causing me to not care about anything or anyone and just trying to hide all the time. Im 26 years old i just want to get my life back on the road make improvements but this time around it just seems so hard. The problem is I work myself up to a point in my life where I am starting to feel secure and confident then i throw it all away to booze and recreational drugs but ive cut that out of my life now and things just seem so crappy. I just wish i had some motivation or some way to feel happyness. I have a great shrink but there are things i hide from him i just dont have the guts to tell somethings and they stick with me and never get solved. Im sure some of you have really personal things that you dont talk to anyone about and keep to yourself and even feel uncomfortable talking to your shrink about??!?
Last edited by son1981; 06-15-2007 at 10:48 PM.
Reason: fixing it up more
Hi poisen, do you love you? Seems like your always trying to reach some unattainable goal, when you reach that goal your still not satisfied. Do you critise and judge yourself in your head or praise yourself for how you are doing? Maybe you think your not worthy or deserving of feeling good, so you sabatage yourself by being abusive to yourself.
I remember a time in my life where I woke up depressed every morning. When I would wake up, my criticle tape would start on me. How bad I was, I couldn't do anything right, I was such a terrible person in my own mind. I was just carrying on where my dad left off in my head. Even now it takes work, I have to love myself, and find things that I like about me. I make a list of things to be thankful for. Depression can really sap your energy.....
Love yourself, the good and the bad......((((HUGS))))
Poison, you really need to get it ALL out there, no matter how hard. It might be uncomfortable at first, but eventually it will feel great. No matter how bad you think it is, I'm sure your shrink has heard it all. Remember- they aren't here to judge us, they are here to help us. Plus, once you lay everything on the table, you can get to the root of your problems and start to feel better little by little. It obviously takes time but you need to work hard and do it for yourself. It is hard to be positive and think we'll ever be happy again when we are feeling at our worst but just keep working for YOU.