I have an eating disorder. It was a problem to others, but I was fine with it. I feel fine, finally think I look good, and was still losing. I set a low weight goal and figured once I reached it I could focus on maintaining or gaining (a little), and I was almost at that weight.
Bosses and family members have taken me aside and asked me about my health. I found this annoying, but no big deal. But last week my boss said if I kept losing weight and if my job performance was affected he could force me take a leave of absence.
What?! I love my job. My identity IS job and my weekly weight goals. Now I have to gain weight or I could lose my job. I think about weight 24/7. I feel like I lost my best friend. I’m forcing myself to eat but it makes me angry. I’m going to get fat, and can’t do anything about it.
I felt like I was achieving something. I enjoyed attending my eating disorder support group, but I didn’t go this week. I don’t belong there anymore. I’ve lost everything. I have no goals. Nothing to focus on or look forward to. When I come home from work I eat dinner, and go straight to bed. I’m depressed and I have nothing.
My identity IS job and my weekly weight goals. Now I have to gain weight or I could lose my job. I think about weight 24/7. I feel like I lost my best friend. I’m forcing myself to eat but it makes me angry. I’m going to get fat, and can’t do anything about it.
I felt like I was achieving something. I enjoyed attending my eating disorder support group, but I didn’t go this week. I don’t belong there anymore. I’ve lost everything. I have no goals. Nothing to focus on or look forward to.
Maria, I am so sorry. So your identity - job and weight goals - you have to choose between them.
Why can't you go to the support group anymore? You still have an eating disorder even though you are eating. You are angry and you still have the needs to have weight goals in order to feel focused in life.
How do you know you have an eating disorder? Are you underweight?
I don't know something else about this, why would your boss feel that your job performance is affected by how skinny or (fat) you are or you get? That sound absurd to me.
Not all people with an eating disorder are underweight. I suffer from anorexia and bulimia and I'm a normal weight. When you don't properly nourish your body it can affect your thinking and judgement and your ability to make sound decisions. This could have an adverse effect on her job performance. Then, there's also the physical aspect of it, dizziness, lightheadedness, passing out, etc.
Last edited by kittywitty; 06-19-2007 at 06:13 PM.
I wasn't trying to imply that she could ONLY have an eating disorder IF she was underweight. Those were two entirely different questions, just to clear up any confusion.
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