Have you ever felt like nothing you ever do is ever good enough and anything you say is wrong? That's what i've come to realize. I'm just never good enough, i'm never pretty enough, i'm not a good enough friend, i'm not a good enough daughter, and the list goes on. nothing i do is ever enough. is it my fault? maybe it is me because all of these people treat me like i'm some kind of punching bag. i can't take anything any more. i just want to move away to some town where no one knows me and i can just hide away from everything. but it's never that easy unfortunately. i just hate the person that i have let myself become. i always thought that i was such a strong person but i gave up about 2 years ago and its been like fighting a losing battle since then. sorry......this week has just been a bad week for me and i'm sorry you had to listen to me vent but i feel like it helps me a little bit. Blessings to everyone.
like trg said, we've all felt that way at one time or another...i know i did, especially about wanting to go away from here, far away to a place where nobody knew me. then again, i wanted to go somewhere where EVERYBODY knew my name....
so, you're not alone in the least!!!
Life is a system of trial and error--forthemasses
that is so very true!!!! you never know what, when, and how things will happen. every turn in the road presents you with a consequence, doesn't it? most of the time we make it...sometimes the shocks are so disturbing though, that we just buckle underneath the weight of it all....but, that's why i like the legend of the phoenix bird...
Be kinder than necessary,
Because everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle...
Hello. when i read this post i thought i had written it. i feel EXACTLY the same way. nothing i do ever seems good enough. NOTHING.
so hey....maybe that makes us ''normal''?? i dont' know. i've been dealing with major depression also for almost 2 years. seems like i'll never be strong again either. well, your not alone is all i can tell ya.
wow, this sure sounds like me most of the time. there are times that i feel better, but most of my life i've always felt that nothing i did was good enough and everything i said was the wrong thing. i either sound stupid or do stupid things. i don't know what more to say, except that my pdoc has me on depakote and lamictal which really seems to help me to overcome alot of this. i am diagnosed with bipolar.
sorry that i can't be of any help to you, just wanted you to know that there probably are alot of people like us out there somewhere.
I understand what you are saying a lot. I have felt like a leftover from loserville for years. I have let family dictate how I feel about me and they don't think nice things. It's like I can't fathom a thought on my own as to who I am and my own worth. So hubby and I at one point decided a new start minus that set of family was in order. Well moving certainly didn't really help as much as I had hoped and it was coupled with new things. I then without the "toxic" family felt even more alone. Sometimes the moving is really running away and I had to wonder what I was afraid of to face. I still am in the fog wondering why I keep trying so hard when life ends up in the same avenue. I know there has to be something more then nothing or feeling as if I am nothing. So take heart and keep trying to find what is missing in you by looking in you. I bet you got a lot to offer to yourself.
Ordinary: I can relate b/c when I'm depressed all I see and feel is negativity and that is something I'm changing, not easy. If you are still going after 2 years sounds like you're a fighter, be gentle with yourself and vent when you need to girl!! Hope this horrible week passes quickly, keep your chin up!!
Last edited by positivity17; 06-21-2007 at 02:56 PM.
Reason: cuss word
Ordinary, if you are looking outside yourself for the approval that you are seeking, what you do will never be good enough. Do you think that you can learn how to give yourself the approval that you are seeking?
Sorry i haven't replied very quickly i was having trouble with my comp. Anyways, thank you so much for the support. this is only like my third post and i can't believe how overwhelming it is to hear the things that you all said. it really did make me feel better but worse knowing that there really are others out there who feel the same way- i would never want to wish those feelings on anyone. i can't even express my gratitude. it's strange because i tried talking to my own family and it's like they don't hear what i say and it just makes everything worse. but all your responses helped me a lot. i think yesterday was the ending of my bad week- i feel better today. i jus wanted you all to know how much i really do appreciate what you said and it really did make a difference. i'll stop rambling now- thank you