I am a little confused with the hours! I do not know whether you have been to the team dinner yet or !
Anyway, I have been in your shoes many times and in the end I even refused to show up. But quess who was the loser?
Now that I am feeling a little better and my self esteem is on the rise, I do not give those dinners or any outing a second thought. I just put on my best outfit, make myself really looking good AND sexy and go, indifferent as to what others think of me. I also hold conversations on every topic they raise and voice my opinion really clearly and hold on to my ground. I found that this is the best approach to be taken seriously. The fact that I look good and sexy makes me feel very confident and gives me the ability to take them on their own game.!!!.
If you try this approach, Maria, rather than having negative thoughts these people underestimate you, you will first of all surprise them and secondly raise the stakes at their own game.
Try and see what happens.