I have been doing so much better since I got out of that hospital that felt like prison. Gave up alcohol and felt like I had a new lease on life. However, I guess it is my fluctuating moods making me sad lately. My son cannot forgive me for my overdose since the first time. He seems to want nothing to do with me. Now my grandaughter is acting kind of distant. She is only 6 now, but we have always been super close.
I guess being on pins and needles waiting to hear about the jobs, especially when I am desperate for money is causing a lot of stress. Plus the idea of starting the job will be very stressful. I had all but given up on my career, but I decided that I want to continue. It is what I know and I am good at.
My friends (so called) also abandoned me when I first started having this crisis. This all started just not quite 2 years ago. When I needed them the most, they had no time for me. I will not forget this for a long time!!! I am looking forward to getting back to work, meeting new friends and starting all over. It is really tough having no one hardly to talk to. Everyone is too "busy" for me.
My family is difficult and not exactly a cheering section!!! They are a tough crowd. I just feel very sad and alone right now. I am ready to move on, and get out of this house and independent again. I am WAY to old to have to abide by my parents rules!!
Wish me luck, you guys are very supportive.
I may be having a computer problem...I have to reinstall the windows and hope I don't screw it up!!