I have been lurking for quite sometime now and not sure if I should post or not. I was diagnosed with Post Pardum Depression a few weeks ago. I was always unhappy, had no energy, lost my temper very easy and was always frustrated. I have a good life, a good husband and two great kids. I am also a stay at home mom. I was feeling guilty for feeling the way I did, because I am so blessed. My marriage was suffering and I felt that my kids(2 1/2 and 7 months) hated me because of the mean grump I had become. I felt myself getting worse and worse. My husband felt like we were hermits because I got to the point that I hated leaving the house. I finally talked to my Dr about it and she put me on Lexapro about 3 weeks ago. I have had great results with it so far. I am once again loving life. I actually enjoy being with my kids now and want to do stuff and actually enjoy it. My husband said that I am getting back to my old self and laughing and smiling again. I still have days when I can feel it, but it is definitely easier to control now.
I was wandering if anyone knew how long I would have to be on the meds for PPD? I never want to be like I was before again. Neither my husband and I realized how bad I actually was until I got on Lexapro and we saw the changes.
I initially went on Celexa for post pardum depression after my second child. It has been 18 months now and I still feel that I need it due to other stresses and just being a depressed person in general. It has helped me feel like a normal person. I had no idea how bad off I was until I started taking medication. When I initially started Celexa, it was because I was so depressed I started to have panic attacks. The medication has certainly helped stabalize the panic attacks. I feel that once you feel you have regained your footing, you will know it. Be careful, though. Some people feel good because of the medication and stop because they feel they are ok again. If you have no history of depression, you should be fine in a short amount of time. Just listen to your intuition and your doctor. I'm glad to hear the medication has helped. Post pardum can be really tough.
Thank you so much for your reply. It is always good to know that I am not alone. Like you I had no idea how bad off I was until I started taking the meds. I kept telling myself that it wasn't that bad, when it really was. I am in no rush to get off of them because I don't want to feel that bad ever again. I was planing to stay on them at least 6 months. I feel like I am going to have a bad day today, but my bad days are not as bad as I used to feel all the time.
The joys of being a mother! Especially with two young ones. I know--mine are two and four. You certainly want to be able to enjoy this time with them. It goes too fast!! Medication has helped me to slow down, not get angry and just be the mommy they need me to be. Perhaps when I don't have to be everything for everyone else, I will go back to not leaning on meds. I love my kiddo's, but for me it's really hard to be a mom. That sounds bad, but what I mean is there is hardly any time or energy for me at the end of the day. I have had a hard time letting that freedom go (ok, ok--I know--it's been four years--get over it already!!) I just do the best I can. I love them both with all my might. Sorry if I sound like I'm complaining, but I am really trying to be supportive!!
It is definitely harder with the two then when I just had my daughter. I never have "me" time anymore. It is either the kids, the house or the husband. You are right time does fly! I can't believe my little guy is already 7 month old, actually going on 8. I feel like I missed so much time and that I was in a daze the whole time he was a newborn. It doesn't help that he is already 22lbs. The medication has helped me slow down too. I don't seem to get as stressed anymore. I can still feel the PPD lurking sometimes, but it is easier to control now and no where near as bad. I love my kids more then anything and I am so glad that I got help and that I have a wonderful hubby. Besides people on the internet he is the only one that knows that I am getting help for PPD. I am sure that people have noticed a difference though. My parents are against any type of antidepressant and would not be supportive of my choice to take them. I am just glad that my husband is there for me. At least I have someone. It didn't sound like you were complaining at all. I really appreciate you sharing your thoughts and experience's with me. It makes me not feel as bad. It is hard when you don't have any energy for yourself. Now I feel like I do have a little more energy for myself and also a desire to actually do things. I actually look at my kids in a whole new way now, it is like I have fallen in love with them all over again. I actually feel something again. I hope that doesn't sound bad, but for the past 6 months, I haven't felt much of anything. Thank you so much for being there for me. I am sorry that you have had PPD, but it is good to know that I am not alone.
As a mother of 4 grown children and a grandmother of 6 i can tell you that you both sound normal. Cherish your kids while you have them. They grow up way to soon. Also take some time for yourslef. Keep up with your friends or make new ones. It will only help you be a better mother. Godbless