I have been reading the messages on this board lately, and I just though I'd share my story to get some input. Maybe it might help.
So I am a 21 year old male college student. As I have felt down since I was 15, I am able to hide it really well. I am able to fake a smile, or at least, that used to be the case. About a year ago, I finally went to my doctors and he put me on Lexapro. That worked well for a year, but now I am feeling worse then ever. My doctor switched my medication, but I am still feeling horrible.
My deal is, I don't understand why I am depressed. I have absolutely no reason to be. Granted, I don't really have a lot of friends, but I still got a fair amount. I have had epiphanies about what it is, but they always turn out to be false. For example, I thought it was because I was in majoring in architecture, so I switched to civil engineering. I felt really glad and happy for the whole part of a day, but then went back to how I was. This happens everytime.
Now I realize I'm not even hoping for anything anymore. I'm not striving anymore, and this is affecting my work and my relations. I have read a couple posts of how people in their 30's or 40's are feeling bad that were kind of as depressed as I at my age. I really don't want to be fighting this when I am that old.
Are there any suggestions? I have no idea why I feel so miserable.
I have been reading the messages on this board lately, and I just though I'd share my story to get some input. Maybe it might help.
So I am a 21 year old male college student. As I have felt down since I was 15, I am able to hide it really well. I am able to fake a smile, or at least, that used to be the case. About a year ago, I finally went to my doctors and he put me on Lexapro. That worked well for a year, but now I am feeling worse then ever. My doctor switched my medication, but I am still feeling horrible.
My deal is, I don't understand why I am depressed. I have absolutely no reason to be. Granted, I don't really have a lot of friends, but I still got a fair amount. I have had epiphanies about what it is, but they always turn out to be false. For example, I thought it was because I was in majoring in architecture, so I switched to civil engineering. I felt really glad and happy for the whole part of a day, but then went back to how I was. This happens everytime.
Now I realize I'm not even hoping for anything anymore. I'm not striving anymore, and this is affecting my work and my relations. I have read a couple posts of how people in their 30's or 40's are feeling bad that were kind of as depressed as I at my age. I really don't want to be fighting this when I am that old.
Are there any suggestions? I have no idea why I feel so miserable.
Thanks for reading.
I don't think depression needs a reason to raise its ugly head. It just is. It is due to an imbalance of chemicals in the brain. You just need to keep working with your Doc until you get the right dosage or mix of meds for your body. I had to list the reasons everyday that shouldn't be depressed just to get out of bed. I think I have the mix now and am on my way to recovery. It also doesn'thurt to find someone to talk to about depression.
Depression does come out of remission. Just be ready if and when it does so that you can tackle it.
Hi Donoy. Unfortuantly depression isnt restricted to the older people, it can hit any age for any reason. I think people in their 30's and beyond are perhaps a little more comfortable talking about it or at least admitting it and getting help.
I think you should see it as a great strength of your character that at your age, you are able to identify your depression. Be proud of that.
You say that you dont know why you feel this way. There will be some sort of trigger that is behind the depression. Sometime it really isnt obvious. Yes medication is terrific and can address the chemical imbalances in your brain but it is important that you also talk about your depression with someone ( a therapist) who can help unravel your emotions and your thought processes so that you can fight it postively.
Take care of yourself. It's nothing to be ashamed of, depression is just another illness and it can be treated.
I am 37 and I have suffered depression for several years now, I talk low dose zoloft and see a psych every two weeks or so and am beginning to feel so much better and more capable. If I was honest I would look back and I had depressive symptoms in my early 20's, perhaps even in my late teens. Perhaps if I had been mature enough to recognise what was happening (like you) and bold enough to seelk treatment I may have not been in the position I have been in!!!!
I'm 45 and after an extremely happy childhood, I was slammed in the head with depression at 19. I always thought that after certain conditions were met, I would then be happy. Well I have a great wife, job, kids, extended family.........but my depression has never lifted. I have tried ten different therapists and a multitude of anti depressants. I realize that unless something drastically changes in the treatment of "THE BEAST" I am stuck with it for life.
I am very functional and if you were to meet me you would think I am the happiest guy in the world because I always try to keep laughing and a positive attitude. I could win an academy award for the show I put on sometimes.
I have good hours but I haven't had a good full day since I was in high school.
I don't really know why I laid this all down on your post, but reality really sucks sometimes............I think I posted my misery because of the title of your thread. I am truly on a one way ticket to hell.
For a new approach consider volunteering..... I block out all thoughts concerning myself. Granted, this takes practice. My attention is solely on the people I am helping. I forget about being depressed and giving is wonderful for the mind.
My deal is, I don't understand why I am depressed. I have absolutely no reason to be. Granted, I don't really have a lot of friends, but I still got a fair amount. I have had epiphanies about what it is, but they always turn out to be false. For example, I thought it was because I was in majoring in architecture, so I switched to civil engineering. I felt really glad and happy for the whole part of a day, but then went back to how I was. This happens everytime.
I think group therapy is one of the best ways to figure this out. It's common for people to come in not knowing why they are depressed. It's not easy to understand sometimes. They share their stories and listen to the feedback from the other 6 or 7 people. Once the whole story comes out, triggers emerge. Seemingly unimportant things to the person can be contributing to the depression. The reasons are often similar so others in the group can relate.
Group therapy is confidential like individual therapy. There is no outside contact. People encourage each other along the way. Change is easier when there are so many people supporting you.
Please help 
