Hi guys, this is my first post, so go easy on me here. All right. Now, don't get all "oh you are too young for this website blah blah" because you know what? I know. Please, all I joined for is that I really want some help.
Okay, so this is my story. I'm * from New York, and my names Olivia. So.. well I guess you already know this, but.. I think I'm depressed. I'm in 7th grade and I guess you could say I'm middle class. I'm okay in school, but lately, my grades have dropped. And I mean DROPPED. Right now, we are getting our quarterly reports, and I have a 44 average in science. It used to be a 92. My tests- in math, I failed about 5. My parents don't know, but I know they will care. Some of my teachers are saying that if I don't past the quarter exams I will go to summer school. I am a little bit popular in school, but that is slipping away too. Some of my friends are forgetting about me, and I feel like I can never belong. Now, heres where the sadness starts. I always feel like no one knows. I have no one. No one to trust, no one to love, no one to actually see what I'm going through. My mom always talked about me seeing a psychologist, but I brought it up. See, no one knows I am sad. And often, I feel like no one cares. I feel stressed way too much. I get up at 6 every morning, going to sleep around 10:30. I go to chamber and select in the morning and I have to wake up a lot earlier then I should. I read books, and sometimes, I just wish that I was a character in those books, because they have real friends, true friends. Sometimes I feel like all my real friends are all online. I have cut myself once or twice with a razor because.. well I just hated the feeling of being out of control ( a lot of stuff was going on). My parents are divorced, and I know what happened, even though I'm not supposed to. My mom had an affair, and no one knows I know. I hate it; all the time I wish I could just go into a room and scream and cry and... break down. I have had thoughts of suicide, but.. I don't know. I just hate that I never feel myself, and no one can understand me.
Am I depressed? I know I'm not overreacting. Please help. I don't want to tell my mom or dad about this. I feel so lonely. So afraid. Help.
Last edited by mentalhealth mod; 04-14-2010 at 07:54 PM.
Reason: removed age due to posting guidelines
I know you have heard this before but do please be careful what information you give out on the boards ( this website) such as your age, all tho i have only ever meet nice people on here there is no harm in being careful.
A few things you have mention can point alittle towards depression, but at the same time because of your age your hormones will be all over the place which can cause the above sadness. Sadness in its self can cause lose of friends because you just want to be alone or not go out to the movies and so on. Please don't think im saying all the above because of your age i developed depression when i was 14. I can re-late to 98% of what you have said. But you should really speak with either your mum or Dad it takes a bigger person to ask for the help than it does to fight it alone.
You mentioned you have to get up at 6 which is alot earlier than you should is this because it takes you so long to get ready or because you find it up to get up and motivated
It sounds like you're going through a lot. One thing I heard you say repeatedly was that you felt as if you had no one to talk to and felt that no one understands what you're going through.
My advice to you is to go speak with a psychologist/counselor, someone who is neutral that you can open up to and share your thoughts and feelings. I'm sure this will require telling your mom/dad something about what you're going through.
It's important that you know you're not alone. Depression (if that's what you have) does not pick and choose ages. However, being 13 isn't easy and presents its own set of challenges.
I commend you for being proactive and for seeking help. I'd go speak with my parent and discuss your options (counseling).
Hi there, I am so sorry to hear about how you feel. Don't let others fool you by saying you are "too young to be depressed." I started becoming depressed around the age of 14 and STAYED that way for years. I wish I had done something sooner, because I started hurting myself later on in life. I felt very similar... very lonely and just felt like I didn't matter. I still have my moments of feeling that way... it's very tough to get over and takes a long time. I moved a lot when I was younger, so I felt like I was unsuccessful in having friends and felt very alone. I tend to still have trouble with friends at my older age now (I'm in my 20's)... most of my better friends live out of town. I recently got married, which has been wonderful, but I feel like I don't have many girlfriends to just go have fun with. It's definitely hard. I use the time to really focus on being a good person myself. I work hard and I'm working on advancing in my career, work hard at eating right and getting into shape, and just taking care of myself. Remember, you have to take care of yourself FIRST and you deserve it! I used to think that doing nice things for myself was selfish, but then I realized that in order to be a good person to be around, you NEED to do that.
I was constantly feeling left out and out of place and kept having weird things in my mind about it. I felt miserable! I decided to start taking Prozac to help with it. My mind has been SO much more relaxed. I feel much more at peace with my life now. Yes, I feel l onely sometimes, but it doesn't take over my life like it used to. Now that I feel much better than before, I feel more relaxed around people and feel like I can just talk to them more easily and not feel so out of place and left out. I am a pretty tired person and have been pretty stressed out, so I have learned to enjoy my alone time to rest and just take it easy!
Definitely don't be afraid to talk to someone about it. I bet people around you, like your mom, would be very glad that you came to her and will want to help you. If you have a school counselor, that is another option. Sometimes it just helps to hae someone to talk to about it. As things get easier with time, your grades should be easier to maintain too. When you feel depressed or anxious, it's easy for grades to slip or other things in life to not go as well. It WILL get better! Just don't give up! Definitely please look into talking to a trusted person about things and try to keep busy with things you enjoy. I have two adopted dogs that I love to play with when I'm feeling down. They're so sweet and loving, and they always improve my mood! I know that they won't let me down!!
Hi Olivia, and welcome to the Healthboards...we are here to help and support each other, no matter our age or our difficulties. It is often helpful just to get your feelings out, to see them in writing. You are not alone, and depression is not anything to be ashamed or embarrassed about. More and more young people are being treated for depression, due to the added pressures of life today.
While being 13 does have it's trials, what you describe is more than that. I am so happy you are seeking help here, but as the others have pointed out, you do need to share your concerns with your mother. I am a mother too, and I can assure you that there is nothing more a mother would want than her child coming to her when she has a problem. If she knew how you were hurting inside, I bet she would stop the world to help you.
There are many very good anti-depression medications available, that can help you. They are safe, and have few side effects after the first week or two. Please don't let this go too long, because help is out there. Please write back and let us know how you are doing...One of the big lessons in life is that we need help sometimes, and this is one of those times for you.
We are glad you are here...and we are here for you, anytime.