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Old 04-21-2010, 10:23 PM   #1
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am i depressed, bi polar, or what is wrong with me

before, i would have days where i just felt depressed some of the day then i would go to bed wake up and be fine. passed couple years, its been happening more and more. im single, lonely, and every woman i get hooked up with ends up leaving me within a month. lately i just feel like giving up. i feel depressed all day, wake up, and feel depressed. my sleeping is all *** up, im drinking almost every day and if i dont drink il start getting headaches. ive lost 30 lbs in the last 2 months. some days are better than others but mainly i just feel like **** all the time. i dont know what to do. dont really have any family. ive lost most of my good friends, people dont seem like they even like to be around me anymore. i have never felt this miserable. empty. lonely....sigh

 
Old 04-22-2010, 12:48 AM   #2
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Re: am i depressed, bi polar, or what is wrong with me

Hi.Sorry to hear about how you feel...The alcohol consumption probably isn't helping you though.Alcohol is a depressant and stays in your system days after drinking it,causing you depressive symptoms.If you are already depressed,it will magnify your feelings.
Getting some type of therapy seems like it would be best to help you figure out why your relationships aren't working.It is also possible you have depression,anxiety,bipolar or a personality disorder.

 
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Old 04-22-2010, 09:12 AM   #3
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Re: am i depressed, bi polar, or what is wrong with me

personality disorder? never even heard of that

 
Old 04-22-2010, 09:41 AM   #4
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Re: am i depressed, bi polar, or what is wrong with me

KMone-

You're in a destructive cycle and only you can stop it. As long as you are allowing yourself to be miserable and drink a lot, people will find it difficult to be around you.

You should see a doctor, first, because it sounds like you are depressed- or, as mentioned earlier, have a personality disorder. You might benefit by going on antidepressants.

And you need to stop drinking. When alcohol becomes a crutch, you're abusing it, and it isn't helping you. Alcohol also disrupts sleep, and you said your sleep is all messed up. Stop drinking.

Start taking care of yourself and finding activities that make you happy and friends will follow. People will gravitate towards you once you start taking care of yourself.

If you believe in God, start attending a church, synagogue, whatever. If you like to read, join a book club. If you like music, go to a coffee house that has live music in the evenings. You will meet people with similar interests that way, plus you'll be out and doing things you enjoy. That will automatically make you happier and easier for people to relate to. Stay away from bars. Some people are there to have fun, but more people are there to escape and they are unhappy and that won't help your situation.

 
Old 04-22-2010, 10:57 AM   #5
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Re: am i depressed, bi polar, or what is wrong with me

i really honestly wanna be happy again. id rather be happy and alone than depressed drunk and alone.

 
Old 04-22-2010, 12:08 PM   #6
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Re: am i depressed, bi polar, or what is wrong with me

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Originally Posted by kmone View Post
i really honestly wanna be happy again. id rather be happy and alone than depressed drunk and alone.
Good. That's the first step. You have to be willing to make the change.

I'd say- first, quit drinking. Second, go to the doctor to be evaluated for depression. Third, get out there and do activities that interest you. Be willing to do them alone- but my bet is that once people see you are having fun and that you're interesting you will make some new friends.

I promise you it's do-able. When I was 21 I had anxiety so bad I was house-bound for 3 months- I never went anywhere. So I know what it's like to be alone and to have to make new friends, but I'm happy now. I don't have LOTS of friends, but I have quality friends and that's what matters.

 
Old 04-22-2010, 11:12 PM   #7
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Re: am i depressed, bi polar, or what is wrong with me

this morning i went and worked out before work....(i used to work out alot back in the day) and i can honestly say i felt better after that than i have in the passed month. i might start making a daily thing out of it if it makes me feel better. besides it cant hurt to get back in shape.

Another thing, i dont want to go see a shrink. i mean i already know im messed up, i dont need somebody to tell me that. id rather find a natural approach. also i dont think i want to quit drinkin all together, but i am definitly willing to make a huge cutback.

 
Old 04-23-2010, 09:15 AM   #8
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Re: am i depressed, bi polar, or what is wrong with me

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Originally Posted by kmone View Post
this morning i went and worked out before work....(i used to work out alot back in the day) and i can honestly say i felt better after that than i have in the passed month. i might start making a daily thing out of it if it makes me feel better. besides it cant hurt to get back in shape.

Another thing, i dont want to go see a shrink. i mean i already know im messed up, i dont need somebody to tell me that. id rather find a natural approach. also i dont think i want to quit drinkin all together, but i am definitly willing to make a huge cutback.
That is EXCELLENT that you went and worked out. Exercise is known for helping with both anxiety and depression, as well as addiction. And getting in shape will also give you more confidence, which will further enable you to make friends. Everyone loves a confident person.

You don't have to see a psychiatrist if you don't want to. A GP can diagnose depression and they will just give you pills, generally, not insist you talk about it. You should talk to people, but you can do that online (like here) as well.

If you want to go 100% natural then keep on exercising, get out and do activities where there will be other people (but not bars), consider trying hypnosis (there are applications for iPod and CD's you can buy, you don't have to go see anyone), consider massage, meditation, yoga, etc. You don't have to do all of those, I'm just tossing out things that are known to help with anxiety and depression. The biggest thing, I think, is to get yourself into situations where you can meet people over a mutual interest. You never said what your interests are but I'm betting you have at least a few that you could turn into an opportunity to meet people.

You remember when we were kids and making friends was so easy? I miss that. When I was 10, on my first day in a new school a girl came up to me at the end of the day and said, "Hi, my name is Jennifer. You want to spend the night at my house?". It's just so easy as a kid. We adults have to work harder at it, but I know you can do it.

 
Old 06-23-2011, 09:53 AM   #9
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Re: am i depressed, bi polar, or what is wrong with me

Quote:
Originally Posted by kmone View Post
before, i would have days where i just felt depressed some of the day then i would go to bed wake up and be fine. passed couple years, its been happening more and more. im single, lonely, and every woman i get hooked up with ends up leaving me within a month. lately i just feel like giving up. i feel depressed all day, wake up, and feel depressed. my sleeping is all *** up, im drinking almost every day and if i dont drink il start getting headaches. ive lost 30 lbs in the last 2 months. some days are better than others but mainly i just feel like **** all the time. i dont know what to do. dont really have any family. ive lost most of my good friends, people dont seem like they even like to be around me anymore. i have never felt this miserable. empty. lonely....sigh
Looks like we are feeling about the same. I am not drinking any more as that stopped working for me. I am exercising alot but lately I even start crying in the middle of a run which can be a little embarrassing out in public. Cant put my finger on or wrap my mind around what is happening. It feels like an unraveling then come the headaches. Never felt like this before as I have always woke up happy and ready to roll. My heart goes out to you, this is surely just a phase we are going through. I hope and pray that some day soon we will think back on this and say "Thank God that's over with" Keep on trying new things, thats what I am doing.

 
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