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Old 10-29-2008, 10:29 PM   #1
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Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Ashville,AL
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mrstassin HB User
Angry Help he's eating us out of house and home!!!!

I am a married mother of 5 who 7 months ago took in 22 yr old my half brother. He is type 1 diabetic and requires 4 insulin shots daily, plus metformin and potassium. I found out recently he was kicked out by every family member we have plus a few of his friends due to lack of taking care of himself properly. I also found out he's been hospitalized 7 times due to being found unconscious from lack of taking his meds properly. He doesn't test his glucose levels except once in a blue moon. I'll go in and check up behind him and see what his levels are and either they are 75 or lower or above 600. He does NOT to care what-so-ever! He sleeps all day, stays up all night and contributes nothing. Also the mood swings are awful!!
The last 5 months with him have been a living nightmare. I have spent at least 4000 in groceries alone. Yes you read that right $4000. Granted yes I have a big family but I keep track of where every item of food goes and 75% of it is eaten by him and him alone. I have taken action recently to kick him out handing him a list of homeless shelters. Ultimately my husband told him he could stay because he knew I was and would worry non stop due to his health.
Now I do not know much about diabetes that being the reason I am here. I myself am on the opposite end of the spectrum where my blood glucose is too low. I've had a developed routine for quite sometime with it. Sadly now I am having problems myself because there is never any food to eat to help me maintain though I have taken to hiding food in my bedroom closet. But what kind of life is that where I actually have to sneak to eat in my own home.
I've tried talking to him about it and it does nothing. I've tried removing any and all unhealthy foods. Nothing! I don't know what else to do!
He is far too young, just a child, to not care this much about his own health and wellbeing.
Can someone, anyone, give me some kind of advice on how to deal with this. I know extreme hunger is a side effect and boy am I being run over by it.
Thanks for your time! God Bless!

 
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Old 10-30-2008, 07:34 AM   #2
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Location: Orwigsburg, PA, USA
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tfkeel HB User
Re: Help he's eating us out of house and home!!!!

It is so very unfortunate that your brother has this outlook upon his life. And you are correct, extreme hunger is a symptom of high blood sugar levels.

I don't know what I can tell you, honestly. It is not possible to change another person. Only ourselves.... you cannot "control" your brother to maintain his health any more than throwing away booze makes an alcoholic stop drinking.... the desire to live and to survive and succeed has to come from within him, and he has to seek God for the wisdom and strength to do so.

This desire does not come about through the life of ease that your brother has being provided by you and your husband. In fact, the words of our Lord and Saviour in the parable of the prodigal son illustrate clearly that this desire comes about when "....he would fain have filled his belly with the husks..."

My advice is this. Go get that list of homeless shelters, and speak to your husband about allowing God to take responsibility for His own child.

 
Old 10-30-2008, 08:28 AM   #3
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Join Date: Oct 2008
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mrstassin HB User
Re: Help he's eating us out of house and home!!!!

Thank you very much for your insight. I have found it to be most helpful and an answer to my prayers. I have prayed fervently over this situation and I come to the same conclusion each time being exatly what you pointed out. He must learn to stand on his own two feet without someone providing a cushy life for him. He needs tough love and he will be getting a healthy dose of it today. I know I cannot help someone who chooses not to help himself. He is in God's hands now!
Again I say thank you! May God Bless you!

 
Old 10-30-2008, 09:02 AM   #4
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Join Date: Jan 2002
Posts: 2,361
AnnD HB UserAnnD HB User
Re: Help he's eating us out of house and home!!!!

For one thing he is not a child and you and your husband are not helping him. Absolutely the only way you can help him is to expect him to leave your home. The problem with everyone is that this young man should of been committed to the mental health system long ago and that can happen if someone cares enough to take it on themselves to get him committed to a mental health hospital so that at least he will get the counseling that he so desperately needs and he will be in a system that can take care of him and not be a drain on you all. That is why just bringing him in your home is not helping him get better and he seriously needs help. Call your local mental health clinic or hospital and ask how you can get him committed...for harming himself(by not taking care of his own diabetic condition he will die so this is what is known as harming yourself) so find out what the procedure is in your state for getting him committed...you might even find your states requirements online. You need to get him out of your home and into the system that can provide for all his needs. And be sure to tell them that you are not responsible for this young mans medical bills. If you can get him into the system they can then apply for Medicaid benefits for him. Good luck to you.

 
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