My daughter was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes shortly after her 4th birthday. I completely understand the heart break and sorrow you experienced. My daughter was afraid of all the shots, and would try to hide and begged me to "get her out of this scary place" It hurt my heart even more when after the training, I was the one giving her shots and she said "Daddy why are you hurting me?"
As time went on though, she became accustomed to it and accepted it as something she has to do. Children are so resilient it really is incredible. Now she doesn't even wince and if I act like I forgot to give her a shot, she will actually remind me! She will be 5 in October, and has been dealing with this for a short 8 months.
I guess what I am trying to say, is take heart, it WILL get better. The regiment will always be here to stay, but the fear will go away
Her Dr advised against a pump for someone of her age. Also, I recently read an article about how pumps can possibly be hacked by malicious people and have settings changed or be turned off remotely. Google 'Insulin pump hacked'
Just something to consider- I won't be changing over to the pump for her because of that article. There are too many sick people in the World.
God Bless, and best of luck to your little one!