WarGerbil

To make a long story short, I've been chronically nauseated for about 14 years now with no known cause. Six months ago I had "minor" surgery and got c-diff twice from having been on 2 rounds of high dose broad spectrum antibiotics. So that was 2 more rounds of AB's for the c-diff. Since then I've had severe, disabling stomach pain and nausea, though I no longer have c-diff. I'm now on my third gastroenterologist -- this one actually is nice and is willing to work with me. She thinks I have gastritis from all the AB's and has me on meds for that, but is concerned about my high lvl of nausea and wants to do an Upper GI (and possibly an endoscopy, but we're not there yet). I agreed to it, but I'm terrified.

1. I'm really bad at drinking non-clear liquids. I gag a lot on things at random anyway, but I have a really hard time getting down think liquids and pretty much as soon as they hit my stomach I start to feel nauseated. I told her there'd been an attempt at this in the past but I couldn't drink the barium and she said the stuff is better now and can be thinned if I need it to be.

2. I'm also afraid that it's going to make me MORE nauseated than I already am, and it's already at an intolerable level. To make things more complicated, I have a vomiting phobia and I am afraid it's going to make me sick. The doctor doesn't know about the phobia because past experience has taught me that as soon as they know, all your problems end up being "in your head" and I need treatment for the pain.

3. My third concern is that I've had to drink contrast material twice in the past for CT scans when I had appendicitis, and it caused nearly instant diarrhea. While this is less concerning than the other two, I'd like to know what I'm in for so I can plan for it. The doc said it's much more likely to cause constipation.

I'd appreciate any advice/experience/words of wisdom anyone may have who has been through this. Thanks.