Please help I am a nervous wreck. My hearing is this coming Thursday with the Judge. I have BP1 not under control, generalized anxiety disorder, fibromyalgia, hypermobility, scoliosis, IBS, gastrisis and divurticulosis and probably something else just can't remember. I don't leave the house, except for doctor's appts. I see my shrink, therapist and pain doc every month and my GP, gastro and dermatologist every couple of months. I don't cook, grocery shop, go out even for lunch. I have no friends but this is not a pity party, this is my life. If I do have to go out, I have to have someone with me due to the BP1 not being under control because if one little thing goes wrong, there will be confrontation.
So you can understand how my nerves are shot about this appt. I feel like this is my last hope and am afraid that because someone cannot see the disability that don't believe you have one. People don't understand the chronic pain I deal with either. I would give anything to be able to work but it is just not possible. I am on 31 pills a day and I don't think anyone would want to take on that liability. I can't sit for long, stand for long, or lay for long. I can't walk for long.
I am scared to death that I will flip while at the hearing with my BP1.
Can someone please tell me what to expect. I have been having a really bad time this last year with the moods and pain but I have been in altercations due to the moods for no reason. Somebody please help. Jenn
Best of luck to you at your hearing...Do you have a lawyer? For lots of "detail" on what to expect, please see the thread titled "Not sure how to feel"....Last post was on 3/25. My post in that thread was on 2/9...I give a pretty long play by play on what to expect.
I am amazed that you have not been awarded disabilty With all the the things you are struggling with? It does not make sense that u have to now face a judge on Thursday and be put though all that. This does not seem right at all. I wish you all the best. your going to be ok! i have not had to do this myself. But, really hoping things go well for you. PLease update us and let us know how things turn out . i can understand your frustration. How long have you waited for this ? I can't believe that you have had to go through so much to win your case! Your suffereing, and need to win! I am on your side for sure. Take care, and plase let us know.
MScat40 Thanks for your reply... I applied in Nov of 2006 and was denied. They advised that I could no longer do my IT computer work but advised that I could do yard work at a church or cememtery or I could do housekeeping at a hospital or hotel. Do these people want to come and check out my house. I can barely do any of the house work. On good days, I try to do the dusting, Clean the toilet and sink, I don't do the bathtub, hurts to bad. I don't cook other than making me 7 all white chicken tenders in the toaster oven. I have to set the alarm on my cell phone and put it in my pocket so that I know when it is time to turn them over. If I don't have this, then there is burnt food. Other than this, this is all I eat for the day. I get up between 5-6am because any longer than this and my body will start to hurt really bad. I take my morning meds and try very hard to make it to the recliner in my living room where I wil nod, off and on until about 10:30 or 11:00 am. Then it is time for another round. This round doesn't make me as tired but it doesn't help either.
The chicken tenders are the only thing I eat everyday and sometimes I don't even eat them. I am just not hungry so why eat. When I do eat, I get really sick and run to the bathroom for the runs for about 4 hours straight. It is not fun.
Sorry for rambling, I am just a nervous wreck. Thank you all for listening.
Executor, I read your post and it was excellent. My problem is that I get really confused and once I do that, it goes downhill from there. I just down know how to keep my emotions in tact. I don't know how I will remember it all. Jenn
It is understandable why your so anxious about your court date on thursday. you have waited three years for this , and in so much pain. For goodness sakes. I feel for you, and it saddens me a great deal. I hope it works out for you. You need to get this , and you deserve a favorable decision. I am very sorry that you are in this amount of pain with little support or help.
I have in home support services. Perhaps this is a possibilty for you? I was able to choose somebody I wanted , and the State pays the person to come in and make meals, clean the place up, and stuff. It helps so much. the person works a certain amount of hrs a month. She/or she can also take you to Dr's appointments and do the shopping or laundry for you. All you need is to be on medicad or medical. I really like the program. My son is on the program too. He is also disabled, and lives with me. I chose my sister N law to help me. I wish you the best.
Jenn you and i can relate so much here. A long wait is very nerve racking and can really trigger the fibro drastically. Reading your post, i hope i can help a bit. Jenn, go back on this disability board to the 2/20/09 post of disability & fibro or is it fibro and disability. See my fog is messing with me trying to think here. Please read those posts there, you have one also posted on it. hopefully this will encourage you to speak out to the judge to understand what you are living with. Also the post EX recommended is a very good one too, i see you did read that, good. Stand tall Jenn, you can do this. My thoughts & prayers are with you and you will do fine.
Keep us posted. Thinking of you.
Jenn.....Just do the best you can. If you go read my post that I referred to, you'll see where the hearing isn't that long. They start by the Judge asking you very basic questions...Name, age, social, & etc. Then, based on all the information they already have, the Judge may ask some questions. Answer them as best you can and as straight forward as you can.
Being that you have a lawyer, he or she will guide you through the whole thing. It's not bad at all. I had a lawyer, and all turned out ok, but I had no idea what I was facing when I went. I would have given about anything for a play-by-play....Just to ease my fears. The "hearing", if you want to call it that....It's really not the right word....More like a "meeting", lasted all of about 20 minutes. It was in a conference room at a long rectangle table.
I got nervous because of the way it was described....A "hearing"...."testimony".....and etc. But in reality, it's just a short meeting of you and your lawyer with the Judge and vocational expert. It's not bad....Really. The fact that you have a lawyer with you is great....He/she will lead and handle everything....Just go along for the ride. You'll do great. It's not that bad, at all. Once it's over, you'll be so relived.
If you feel like doing so, please let us know how it goes afterwards. Take care, and best of luck to you.
sorry i haven't been back... My hearing/meeting is this morning. my meeting with my attorney was tuesday and i had my trigger point injections were yesterday. My attorney wasn't ready for my BP outburst on tuesday i don't believe. I told him he should have had a body guard my husband said that is what he was there for LOL. My attorney asked me about things in my records that I didn't know anything about. He also told me to answer in short one or two word answers and if they needed additional information they would ask. He said the judge is very laid back, compassionate but, we will see. Thank you all for your words of support. I will take your words with me. My 21 year old son just bought me the rosary that he and i made when he was in the 1st grade for good luck. I had no idea he still had it. I just hope the BP doesn't rear its ugly head and jump over the table because the fibro ugly head is already here. Love to you all and many thanks... Jenn
All of your thoughts must have been with me. My attorney had told me on Tuesday that the Judge would be here to listen to many cases and then be off for 6 weeks to go over all the cases and make a decision. You all would not believe what happened as I think I am still in shock along with my attorney. We started out with the pain, then went to the mental part and then the Judge asked the vocational expert if I could do any of the jobs I had done in the past, his answer was no. He then asked him if I could do any job in the economy today, without any hesitation, he answered no. The judge said he was entering a fully favorable decision and was entering the decision at that time. He said that my letter should be here in 4 weeks and I would then need to go to the SS office. I could not believe it. We were in there for about 45-50 minutes. After leaving, my attorney said that rarely does a judge make a decision on the spot. I believe he was even shocked.
Thank you all for your support. I think the best part of it was the validation if you can believe it. Thank you all so much. Jenn