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Old 03-20-2012, 02:24 AM   #31
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Re: We all need a helping hand...

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Originally Posted by ferd144 View Post
Hi Folks,

Its been awfully quiet the last few days on the forum,and hope everybody is doing OK.I myself have not been feeling well physically(which turns into a semi-depressive state of mind in my simple world)

Every once in awhile,we all go through this.......and that was the message I was sending with my OP.Just being approved for SSDI means NOTHING when you look at the grand scheme of things

Ferd
Hi Fred, I am sorry you are down in the dumps, but i can relate. I agree, most of us have a chronic illness, I have 3 myself. I just got out of the hospital again for my heart failure. I am sick of being sick. I have been depressed as well. It does not help that I live in Oregon where it rains 99% of the time. I also have problems of boredum, there is so much I can no longer do anymore, it sucks. I really hope your health improves, please take care

 
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Old 03-21-2012, 02:46 PM   #32
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Re: We all need a helping hand...

Hi ferd , I am sorry your not feeling too good. That happens to me , where I will just stay inside for several weeks, and not talk to anyone , expect my son. I just want to lay on the couch and sleep as long as possible, the depression is paralyzing at times. Even though Itake a lot of medication. my brother gets really mad at me when I turn off the phones, he only lives a mile away , but does not come over , and wants me to go to his place, and I have no energy whatsoever. Being disabaled is no fun, and some people just do not understand. they think we are lazy and have it made because we get a check each month theydo not understand how bad things can get.

 
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Old 03-21-2012, 05:31 PM   #33
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Re: We all need a helping hand...

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Originally Posted by mscat40 View Post
Hi ferd , I am sorry your not feeling too good. That happens to me , where I will just stay inside for several weeks, and not talk to anyone , expect my son. I just want to lay on the couch and sleep as long as possible, the depression is paralyzing at times. Even though Itake a lot of medication. my brother gets really mad at me when I turn off the phones, he only lives a mile away , but does not come over , and wants me to go to his place, and I have no energy whatsoever. Being disabaled is no fun, and some people just do not understand. they think we are lazy and have it made because we get a check each month theydo not understand how bad things can get.
I fully agree. I am the exact same way as you are Mscat.

 
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Old 03-22-2012, 06:53 AM   #34
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Re: We all need a helping hand...

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Originally Posted by mscat40 View Post
Hi ferd , I am sorry your not feeling too good. That happens to me , where I will just stay inside for several weeks, and not talk to anyone , expect my son. I just want to lay on the couch and sleep as long as possible, the depression is paralyzing at times. Even though Itake a lot of medication. my brother gets really mad at me when I turn off the phones, he only lives a mile away , but does not come over , and wants me to go to his place, and I have no energy whatsoever. Being disabaled is no fun, and some people just do not understand. they think we are lazy and have it made because we get a check each month theydo not understand how bad things can get.
I hear you on the sleep on the couch thing.. I have actually ruined my couch to the point it needs to be replaced and its only a couple years old. I was literally watching the world go by. I HAD to stop that. I started thinking there is going to come a time I am going to wish I had all those hours of laying around back.. So, I did stop it. Its so hard. And harder trying to figure out something to do that I can do - just to get out of the house for an hour or two. Sometimes I just go for a ride to no where. But at todays gas prices, I don't ride too far.


 
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Old 03-22-2012, 12:39 PM   #35
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Re: We all need a helping hand..........

I guess I fail to understand the protocol for this discussion board since I've posted twice in two different areas and they were overlooked. Maybe I was getting into someone else's discussion and that's not acceptable. Although I have seen others share their feelings and opinions and receive replies.

I'll just continue doing my own research in regards to this.

Thanks
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Last edited by Looking4aAnswer; 03-22-2012 at 03:45 PM. Reason: No response

 
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Old 03-22-2012, 02:42 PM   #36
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Re: We all need a helping hand..........

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Originally Posted by Looking4aAnswer View Post
BllueSkies14: My fear is that I will have to explain or validate why I am not working and receiving assistance. I have thoughts of isolating as well because part of me feels a great deal of shame, while the other part of me doesn't have a choice in this matter.
Yeah, thanks for sharing Looking4aAnswer. I have similar feelings.

 
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Old 03-22-2012, 03:20 PM   #37
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Re: We all need a helping hand...

A friend of mine called me today.. she lives up north. I was telling her about the isolating etc and she suggested I join a club of sorts. Of course, I asked - a CLUB? Yeh, JUST what I need. But she went on to explain them. She belongs to a couple of them. They are 'private' and you need to become a member. Usually, annual dues of about $25 year depending on the club. But most of the folks inside are really nice. They have activities AND the best part she claim is many many many of the members are just like us.

She demystified these private clubs. I see them all over the place-you probably do too. I always wondered about them. She said they will interview if you want to become a member and don't know anyone who can sponsor you, just to sure you're 'ok'.

Most of these clubs all have lounges/bars.. er, "social rooms" that are open every day & cocktails, should you wish to partake - then you'd be happy to hear are at the price level of the 70s!!

They continually fund raise for cancer or heart etc. They organize trips once or twice a year - that all depends on the activity of the club itself, to casino's or cruises, sometimes a european trip. Its done so far in advance so you can save up for it if you want to go. None of it is mandatory. Its usually just an activity that some members thought would be nice to do and took it upon them self to organize. Some of these clubs have lunches available every day, some do dinners a few times a week. again depends on the activity of the club. Once you're sworn in as a member of that club then all the 'sister' clubs allows you to go to all/any of the other 'like' clubs in the area or around the country. Many have district, state and national conventions even. she said they seemed to have all started as 'mens' clubs, but most all have auxiliaries for the (women folk). LOL. A couple allow the clubs to have both men and women at the meetings and don't separate them. And you aren't mandated to go to meetings if you don't want to go.

She urged me to check them out. She loves the 2 she belongs to and when she and her husband travel they find the nearest club at their destination and stop in for a drink or chatter with the locals.

There are a few around me. I'm not military, so (those clubs) won't work for me unless I pull info from relatives - but that could be done also. Or I could join one of the military clubs as a non voting member in the auxiliary.

There are all kinds of clubs in all of our towns.. If you don't drink I'm certain that can't be a stopping point. I'd bet there is something you could get involved in to help kids, or raise money for cancer or for diabetes (HELLO) or heart fund.. or heck - just sit and gab. No one is doing a credit check to see where your income is generated, us SSDI folks can just be freakin retired or happily unemployed.. or sufficiently secure.. or even my favorite one: "independently poor" (as I used to say eons ago to be a smart @ss when people would get too nosy about my personal business). couples can join too.. they aren't singles joints.. but I guess they could be.. not every one is married or single - and the members are all ages. She even seems to think some of these private clubs have sub clubs for those interested in motorcycles - and they do cycle trips.

Its something to think about. Go to the yellow pages to Organization/clubs. finds them. Make a couple phone calls to the ones in your area. See what the membership requires; What the age group that is active is.. What activities do they do..etc.

Its just a phone call.
Ya ain't doin' nuttin else...
CALL.
I'm going to. Better than
watching paint dry. right?

Hugs,

 
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Old 03-22-2012, 03:40 PM   #38
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Re: We all need a helping hand...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jacki345 View Post
A friend of mine called me today.. she lives up north. I was telling her about the isolating etc and she suggested I join a club of sorts. Of course, I asked - a CLUB? Yeh, JUST what I need. But she went on to explain them. She belongs to a couple of them. They are 'private' and you need to become a member. Usually, annual dues of about $25 year depending on the club. But most of the folks inside are really nice. They have activities AND the best part she claim is many many many of the members are just like us.

She demystified these private clubs. I see them all over the place-you probably do too. I always wondered about them. She said they will interview if you want to become a member and don't know anyone who can sponsor you, just to sure you're 'ok'.

Most of these clubs all have lounges/bars.. er, "social rooms" that are open every day & cocktails, should you wish to partake - then you'd be happy to hear are at the price level of the 70s!!

They continually fund raise for cancer or heart etc. They organize trips once or twice a year - that all depends on the activity of the club itself, to casino's or cruises, sometimes a european trip. Its done so far in advance so you can save up for it if you want to go. None of it is mandatory. Its usually just an activity that some members thought would be nice to do and took it upon them self to organize. Some of these clubs have lunches available every day, some do dinners a few times a week. again depends on the activity of the club. Once you're sworn in as a member of that club then all the 'sister' clubs allows you to go to all/any of the other 'like' clubs in the area or around the country. Many have district, state and national conventions even. she said they seemed to have all started as 'mens' clubs, but most all have auxiliaries for the (women folk). LOL. A couple allow the clubs to have both men and women at the meetings and don't separate them. And you aren't mandated to go to meetings if you don't want to go.

She urged me to check them out. She loves the 2 she belongs to and when she and her husband travel they find the nearest club at their destination and stop in for a drink or chatter with the locals.

There are a few around me. I'm not military, so (those clubs) won't work for me unless I pull info from relatives - but that could be done also. Or I could join one of the military clubs as a non voting member in the auxiliary.

There are all kinds of clubs in all of our towns.. If you don't drink I'm certain that can't be a stopping point. I'd bet there is something you could get involved in to help kids, or raise money for cancer or for diabetes (HELLO) or heart fund.. or heck - just sit and gab. No one is doing a credit check to see where your income is generated, us SSDI folks can just be freakin retired or happily unemployed.. or sufficiently secure.. or even my favorite one: "independently poor" (as I used to say eons ago to be a smart @ss when people would get too nosy about my personal business). couples can join too.. they aren't singles joints.. but I guess they could be.. not every one is married or single - and the members are all ages. She even seems to think some of these private clubs have sub clubs for those interested in motorcycles - and they do cycle trips.

Its something to think about. Go to the yellow pages to Organization/clubs. finds them. Make a couple phone calls to the ones in your area. See what the membership requires; What the age group that is active is.. What activities do they do..etc.

Its just a phone call.
Ya ain't doin' nuttin else...
CALL.
I'm going to. Better than
watching paint dry. right?

Hugs,
Great Post Jacki...........I think ideas like this such as social clubs,support groups,etc are a tremendous idea and can/and should be very fulfilling.It is amazing how the ups and downs of disability affect each of us in some way,shape or form.

In my opinion,whatever makes your day an *easier one* is a blessing in my book.Whether it be a physical or mental disability,things like this make me feel better when others understand this


 
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Old 03-22-2012, 04:38 PM   #39
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Re: We all need a helping hand..........

Quote:
Originally Posted by Looking4aAnswer View Post
I guess I fail to understand the protocol for this discussion board since I've posted twice in two different areas and they were overlooked. Maybe I was getting into someone else's discussion and that's not acceptable. Although I have seen others share their feelings and opinions and receive replies.

I'll just continue doing my own research in regards to this.

Thanks
Hi Looking4Answers

I just noticed your post above, and feel terrible that no-one replied to you with your questions.I have not been that active the last week or so but would be glad to try an help you.That is what this forum is for.

IMHO there is no particular protocol on this forum as to where/how you post a particular question.The main problem is you might post *within* an existing thread and it gets skimmed over/or overlooked by the many helpful members here if its not on the same subject line.If its a specific issue,that no one has replied to ........then start a new thread

My suggestions would be:

1) If the question/or subject does NOT pertain to the original thread/title...........then start a new thread where it will stand out more.In this manner many more folks will see it and will then address your question

2) If the question is *within" a thread......quote the OP(original poster) and you will have a better chance at a response

These suggestions go to everyone here.....newbies or oldtimers

Either way,if you would like to ask your questions again,I would be glad to attempt to help you.And if I cant ,there is plenty of great advice from the many experienced members here that will surely give it a try

GL,
Ferd144

 
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Old 03-22-2012, 05:29 PM   #40
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Re: We all need a helping hand..........

Quote:
Originally Posted by Looking4aAnswer View Post
I guess I fail to understand the protocol for this discussion board since I've posted twice in two different areas and they were overlooked. Maybe I was getting into someone else's discussion and that's not acceptable. Although I have seen others share their feelings and opinions and receive replies.

I'll just continue doing my own research in regards to this.

Thanks
No, keep posting Looking4aAnswer. You are doing nothing wrong. Sometimes, I will ask a question and might not get many responses and other times, get many responses back in another thread. Sometimes , when people are not feeling well, they quit posting for a little while but most regulars who post to this particular board will start posting back again and will respond to you even if it is to say I don't know or I am not sure.

 
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Old 03-22-2012, 05:37 PM   #41
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Re: We all need a helping hand...

Hi Looking4aAnswer,

I just went in search for your original question - I do not find it. I searched, but see many posts in other HB forums.

Please repost your question for us.. Do so by starting a new thread/topic so everyone will see it, and it won't get buried in this one.

Hugs,

 
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Old 03-22-2012, 06:08 PM   #42
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Re: We all need a helping hand..........

Ferd144: Thanks. I'm just struggling with applying for disability and trying to explain it to others who expect me to have a successful career. I've seen comments where people isolate and I believe that would be the best approach for me because the avoidance would prevent the cross examination as to why I'm not working.

Thanks!!
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Old 03-22-2012, 06:11 PM   #43
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Re: We all need a helping hand...

Jacki345: I will post this on a separate one. Thanks.
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